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The Counterintuitive Reason You’re Spinning Your Wheels in Business

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Whenever you’re looking to reach a goal in your life, especially if that’s building your own business, there’s one piece of advice you hear over and over again. You must have a ‘why’ that keeps you going when things get tough. And that’s good advice…but it’s incomplete. Picking just one why—no matter how compelling it may seem—isn’t enough to carry you through when things get tough. And they are going to get tough (that’s an inevitability!)  Hanging the success of your big dream on one why is setting you on a path to failure.

The Single Why problem

The problem with a single why is that it’s sneaky. It’s not readily apparent that the why you’ve chosen can’t hold up to the stress that comes with being a business owner because the why is incomplete. And let’s be honest—there’s more anxiety and fear in the entrepreneurial journey than anyone realizes before embarking on this path. It’s one of those things that you can’t truly understand until you’ve lived through it.

Most whys are not nearly specific enough. Focusing your why generally on things like financial freedom, becoming a millionaire, or giving your children more than you had can’t hold up to the pressure of the journey. They’re not specific and tangible enough to keep you going when the challenge is so clear and in your face. You must make your why specific. To get specific with your why, paint the scene of the experience with the emotions that will fill you and let yourself really go there in your mind.

A why like this looks like:

  • So I can buy my dream house in the mountains to host Christmas every year for my entire family, baking cookies, going sledding in the backyard, and making sure my parents are surrounded by their grandkids to take more photos than any one human ever needs to commemorate it all.
  • So I can go to the store and buy anything without having to triple check my account, sliding my card at the register with more peace than I would have sitting at the beach.
  • So I can take two hours to myself each morning and focus on my connection to my Higher Power, feel grounded in my body, work out, and feel ready to take on the day before I ever check my phone because there is no one else to answer to. I make the rules.

The more specific you make your why, the more compelling it will be. But you’re not done yet.

Having a compelling why is great—and it’s much stronger than a flat, one-dimensional, wrote-it-in-five-seconds-at-a-conference why. But you actually need more than one why.

“When you know your why, you’ll know your way.” – Michael Hyatt

The Six-dimensional Why

One why is never enough to really create massive change and amazing things in your life. A single why is too flimsy to truly support incredible dreams. And let’s face it, if you’re reading this, chances are your dreams are big, bold, and some may even say a little crazy. The bigger the dream, the more difficult the journey.

That means there will be times that you are so frustrated, anxious, or stressed that your one why can collapse under the pressure. If the pain of now is more compelling than your why, then the pain of now will win over your why every time. That leads to you telling yourself things like:

  • “I want time freedom, but it seems too hard—so just let me get a job.” 
  • “I want to create this for my kids, but right now, I want to sell those kids to a circus.”
  • “I want to publish a book to leave a legacy, but I never seem to have any time. So I may as well pack that dream away.”

The pain of not having your dream must be more excruciating than the pain of accomplishing your goals. That’s why the Six-dimensional why™ will act as your safety net and catch you when things get rough. The Six-dimensional why™ puts the pain of not having what you most desire front and center in your mind to keep you going. Here’s why it works so well.

Having a Six-dimensional why™ means you never have to rely on just one motivational vision. You can clearly see how your goal will impact every area of your life. When one why falls short, the others pick up the slack. The Six Dimensions are:

  • Financial
  • Emotional
  • Mental 
  • Physical
  • Social 
  • Spiritual

These whys might look like:

  • Financial: So I can pay off my student loans in the next three years, and then put all of that money toward an investment account for my kids so that when they graduate college, they’re set up for a successful start. 
  • Emotional: So I can finally walk into a bookstore and see the center display full of my books, watching passersby pick up a copy and carry it with them to the checkout counter. 
  • Mental: So I can hear the ping of my phone without having an anxiety attack and instead feel peaceful and expansive in my life, knowing that the ping I just heard was another sales notification. 
  • Physical: So I can go to my high school reunion wearing my favorite dress and red bottom shoes, hearing people tell me how I’ve barely aged (hair toss). 
  • Social: So I can take my kids and my parents to Disney World twice a year for a week or two at a time, so we can fully take in the experience and eat at Cinderella’s castle instead of hitting up the food carts.
    Spiritual: So I can look back on my life before I die and know that I fulfilled my purpose, doing everything I could to live up to the vision I had for my life.

When you write out your Six-dimensional why™, you should feel the power of it coursing through your body. Each one should evoke an emotion from you that makes you want to get to work on your goals. That way, when the challenges hit you hard, you have something six times stronger than the challenge to meet it with. Crafting the right why makes all the difference in your resilience and success. Take the time to go all-in on your own Six-dimensional why™.

Bevin Farrand is a business strategist, coach, and founder of the Take the DAMN Chance movement, using her over 15 years of experience in personal development, psychology, and communication to support small businesses and entrepreneurs to develop and execute strategies to take their revenue to 6- and 7-figures. Her superpower is helping people bring their big, bold, crazy dreams to life. In 2019, after unexpectedly losing her husband 5 days after they returned from a whirlwind trip to France, Bevin Farrand founded the Take the DAMN Chance movement. Her DAMN framework has inspired hundreds to connect with the people that they love, do the “crazy thing” that makes all the difference and, when given a choice, to take the damn chance. Bevin's genius and insights have been seen on NBC, the Online Marketing Made Easy Podcast, Lessons from a Quitter, and more.

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Life

9 Harsh Truths Every Young Man Must Face to Succeed in the Modern World

Before chasing success, every young man needs to face these 9 brutal realities shaping masculinity in the modern world.

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harsh truths for young men
Image Credit: Midjourney

Many young men today quietly battle depression, loneliness, and a sense of confusion about who they’re meant to be.

Some blame the lack of deep friendships or romantic relationships. Others feel lost in a digital world that often labels traditional masculinity as “toxic.”

But the truth is this: becoming a man in the modern age takes more than just surviving. It takes resilience, direction, and a willingness to grow even when no one’s watching.

Success doesn’t arrive by accident or luck. It’s built on discipline, sacrifice, and consistency.

Here are 9 harsh truths every young man should know if he wants to thrive, not just survive, in the digital age.

1. Never Use Your Illness as an Excuse

As Dr. Jordan B. Peterson often says, successful people don’t complain; they act.

Your illness, hardship, or struggle shouldn’t define your limits; it should define your motivation. Rest when you must, but always get back up and keep building your dreams. Motivation doesn’t appear magically. It comes after you take action.

Here are five key lessons I’ve learned from Dr. Peterson:

  • Learn to write clearly; clarity of thought makes you dangerous.

  • Read quality literature in your free time.

  • Nurture a strong relationship with your family.

  • Share your ideas publicly; your voice matters.

  • Become a “monster”, powerful, but disciplined enough to control it.

The best leaders and thinkers are grounded. They welcome criticism, adapt quickly, and keep moving forward no matter what.

2. You Can’t Please Everyone And That’s Okay

You don’t need a crowd of people to feel fulfilled. You need a few friends who genuinely accept you for who you are.

If your circle doesn’t bring out your best, it’s okay to walk away. Solitude can be a powerful teacher. It gives you space to understand what you truly want from life. Remember, successful men aren’t people-pleasers; they’re purpose-driven.

3. You Can Control the Process, Not the Outcome

Especially in creative work, writing, business, or content creation, you control effort, not results.

You might publish two articles a day, but you can’t dictate which one will go viral. Focus on mastery, not metrics. Many great writers toiled for years in obscurity before anyone noticed them. Rejection, criticism, and indifference are all part of the path.

The best creators focus on storytelling, not applause.

4. Rejection Is Never Personal

Rejection doesn’t mean you’re unworthy. It simply means your offer, idea, or timing didn’t align.

Every successful person has faced rejection repeatedly. What separates them is persistence and perspective. They see rejection as feedback, not failure. The faster you learn that truth, the faster you’ll grow.

5. Women Value Comfort and Security

Understanding women requires maturity and empathy.

Through books, lectures, and personal growth, I’ve learned that most women desire a man who is grounded, intelligent, confident, emotionally stable, and consistent. Some want humor, others intellect, but nearly all want to feel safe and supported.

Instead of chasing attention, work on self-improvement. Build competence and confidence, and the rest will follow naturally.

6. There’s No Such Thing as Failure, Only Lessons

A powerful lesson from Neuro-Linguistic Programming: failure only exists when you stop trying.

Every mistake brings data. Every setback builds wisdom. The most successful men aren’t fearless. They’ve simply learned to act despite fear.

Be proud of your scars. They’re proof you were brave enough to try.

7. Public Speaking Is an Art Form

Public speaking is one of the most valuable and underrated skills a man can master.

It’s not about perfection; it’s about connection. The best speakers tell stories, inspire confidence, and make people feel seen. They research deeply, speak honestly, and practice relentlessly.

If you can speak well, you can lead, sell, teach, and inspire. Start small, practice at work, in class, or even in front of a mirror, and watch your confidence skyrocket.

8. Teaching Is Leadership in Disguise

Great teachers are not just knowledgeable. They’re brave, compassionate, and disciplined.

Teaching forces you to articulate what you know, and in doing so, you master it at a deeper level. Whether you’re mentoring a peer, leading a team, or sharing insights online, teaching refines your purpose.

Lifelong learners become lifelong leaders.

9. Study Human Nature to Achieve Your Dreams

One of the toughest lessons to accept: most people are self-interested.

That’s not cynicism, it’s human nature. Understanding this helps you navigate relationships, business, and communication more effectively.

Everyone has a darker side, but successful people learn to channel theirs productively into discipline, creativity, and drive.

Psychology isn’t just theory; it’s a toolkit. Learn how people think, act, and decide, and you’ll know how to lead them, influence them, and even understand yourself better.

Final Thoughts

The digital age offers endless opportunities, but only to those who are willing to take responsibility, confront discomfort, and keep improving.

Becoming a man today means embracing the hard truths most avoid.

Because at the end of the day, success isn’t about luck. It’s about who you become when life tests you the most.

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Change Your Mindset

Work-Life Balance Isn’t a Myth: Here’s How to Actually Make It Happen

Work stress doesn’t have to win, here’s how to protect your peace and thrive in any workplace.

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workplace stress management techniques
Image Credit: Midjourney

Starting a new job often comes with excitement and ambition. Yet, beneath that initial enthusiasm, many employees quickly encounter the reality of workplace challenges, especially stress. (more…)

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Change Your Mindset

The Four Types of Happiness: Which One Are You Living In?

Most people chase success only to find emptiness, this model reveals why true happiness lies somewhere else.

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happiness model explained
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In a world driven by rapid technological growth and constant competition, many people unknowingly trade joy for achievement. (more…)

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Success Advice

11 Mark Manson Lessons That’ll Redefine Success in the Digital Age

Success in the digital age isn’t about hacks, it’s about the raw, real lessons Mark Manson actually lives by.

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Mark Manson life lessons on success
Image Credit: Midjourney

In 2016, Mark Manson released The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck, a brutally honest, thought-provoking book that redefined self-help for a new generation. (more…)

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