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The Best Way To Deal With A**H@&#s? Don’t Become One

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I found myself recently having to deal with a total a$$. All I did was send a short email to confirm I was doing the right thing in relation to a small matter. The intent was to be respectful and brief.

This guy sends me back a rude email that doesn’t answer my question and insinuates that I’m trying to self-promote myself and another person. Clearly, this person doesn’t read my blog posts or understand my mantra: “Success is not about you.”

Given that this person holds one of the many keys to my success, I was temporarily defeated. They took the wind out of my sail for a few brief moments. That’s until the personal development program that’s stored in my brain kicked in.

Before I knew it, I had broken the effect of the a$$ pattern, taken a chill pill, and made the decision not to be an a$$ back. None of this was easy, but success never is. It takes discipline and an outside view of what your senses are experiencing to gain a positive perspective.

Our initial internal reaction to an a$$ is not what matters; it’s the actions towards the other person that can empower us or ruin our mindset. I’ve since responded to this a$$ and not heard back. I’ve already decided to go around them and find someone else who can help me get the same results. There’s always another way.

Here are some quick tips for dealing with a$$’s like this turd burger:

 

1. Don’t become one yourself

The worst thing you can do is respond to an a$$ by becoming one yourself. It was so tempting for me to reply to this email with some smart-ass response like, “Check out my blog posts you twerp! You’re wrong.”

Reacting to negativity like this is playing the short game. The key is to do nothing initially. Let the negative emotions subside and pretend for a second that the previous correspondence was a mistake.

“How you react is a reflection of you, not the a$$ you’re dealing with”

2. Talk nicely

It’s damn tempting to reply to nasty words with your own repertoire (I know mine’s very long..haha). Fighting fire with fire will only make the situation worse. The best way to diffuse an a$$ is to do the opposite of what they’re doing. Kill them with niceness.

A true a$$ can’t stay as one when you don’t acknowledge their status. Their “a$$ status” is what defines them and being kind to them is not something they know how to deal with. It’s because they haven’t dealt with their demons, that they’ve become an a$$ in the first place.

Maybe you can help them deal with their problems? I know it can be hard, so sometimes it’s better to stay away. Grab a roll of Police Tape, corner off the area, and stay the heck away. Find someone else who can help you achieve the same goal.

What I’ve realized is that when an a$$ is blocking your way, there is always another person that can be the shining light to a different route towards your success. The problem is not you just remember that!

 

3. Assume they have a big ego

A$$’s want you to get angry and stroke their ego. The reason they’re an a$$ in the first place is that their ego is out of control. They’ve forgotten how unimportant they are in the scheme of the entire universe.

Our ego is what can make us think we’re more successful and beautiful than we are. No matter how well things are going and you’re social status in society, remember that it can all disappear overnight. Eventually, someone is going to report the a$$ you’re dealing with to someone who holds power over them.

We all have someone who holds us accountable. Finding an a$$’s accountability partner is the best way to snap them out of their trance. It’s not about revenge; it’s about helping them to be successful in the long term.

 

4. A$$’s make a lot of assumptions

The key trait of an a$$ is that they make a lot of assumptions. They assume that you intended on something you did not. It’s their assumptions that have caused their mind to lose track of reality. When we assume, we draw conclusions that are complete delusions.

This is why a$$’s seem so crazy because they’re borderline delusional. To overcome an a$$’s assumptions, challenge them. Find out what they’ve assumed about you and then bust their myths to pieces with cold hard facts. Do so in a polite, non-emotional way.

It’s about letting the truth shine through and not being chained down by their unfair treatment of you and your situation. Forget sympathy; fight for what’s right instead. A$$’s are weak at heart, and you can either enhance their weakness further or suppress it and be the positive change they need in their life.

When an a$$ has made assumptions about me, I’ve often made the mistake of making assumptions back. By playing the assumption game, we run the risk of becoming an a$$ ourselves.

“An a$$ wants to multiply their population, so they stop feeling lonely. You can either be the sperm to their egg or the eradicator of their disease”

My hope is that you’ll make the right choice and not become an a$$. The A$$ Academy is growing thanks to the Internet, and so we need to be even more diligent than ever not to become one accidentally.

The a$$ trap comes with a whole host of inclusions that none of us want like: no love, no emotion, an ugly ego, and a smile like the devil. Choose hope! Choose love! Choose compassion!

How do you deal with a$$’s? Let me know on my website timdenning.net or my Facebook.

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How Your Friends Determine Whether You Succeed or Not

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Can anyone do without having friends? We all have our friends, we share ideas with them, talk together, have fun, and fight. Yes, that’s the baseline of friendship. But, do you know that aside from you, your friends can determine whether you achieve success or not?

There are two things in friendship which are the ability to ”love” and the ability to “influence”. This means you are loved and you are influenced. How do your friends affect your success in life? How are they one of the biggest deciding factors of your success? Let’s find out.

What type of friends do you keep? 

First, what type of friends do you keep? Who do you call your best friend? There are two different kinds of friends, good friends, and bad ones. A lot of people have lost their pathway to success and some have also found their road to success all because of the friends they keep, the people they mingle with. 

Who is your best friend? Answer carefully. Having a best friend means you find each other compatible and understanding. Analyze who your best friend is. If your best friend has not motivated you to do something positive, if who you call your bestie has never given you positive advice, lastly if your best friend has never informed and advised you on your shortcomings, then you don’t have a best friend.

This quote tells us “birds of the same feather flock together”. Countless people have changed from their good nature into a bad one all because of friends. One thing to note is, “negative people move with negative aura”. If your best friend is filled with negativity inside-out then you will surely be affected by his/her negative aura.

They influence your success with positivity or negativity 

The friends you keep can either influence you with positivity or negativity because your friends have the power to change your kind of person completely. 

This is how your friends influence you:

  1. They influence you indirectly with what they do
  2. They influence you directly by teaching and giving you advice 

Yes, that is how they influence you. For instance, you watch a movie and you like the way the actor walks. The question is if you truly like the way the actor walks, won’t you try to imitate the actor? Of course, you will.

Just the way you imitate the actor is the same way your friends can influence you with their character. However, the funny part is, they don’t have to teach you to do things like them. You just find yourself imitating and copying them gradually.

An important question to ask is, are you imitating a good friend or a bad one? If you imitate a good friend then you will be good, but if you imitate a bad person, you will surely become a bad person.

Everyone wants to succeed, a good friend will always teach, enlighten, and motivate you for success. A bad friend will only motivate you to do evil things (smoking, drinking, fight, envy,).

And you should know that things like that are a great enemy of success and even of God. So, if you have these bad elements in your life, how will you achieve success? There is no way!

And also, they can teach and advise you directly. But, what do your friends teach you? When you ask them for advice do they inspire you positively or teach you the bad stuff.? A lot of people have regretted lifelong decisions just by listening to the advice of friends. 

The company you keep has the power to influence and change you. Never forget that a positive influence will teach, motivate, and brush you up for success. While a negative influence will inspire you to become a bad person, change your good nature, and leave you with regrets in the end.

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The 3 Step Process to Building a Profitable Pitch

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As a communication coach, one of the top questions entrepreneurs ask me is how to deliver a winning pitch to potential investors. They want to know if there’s a magic formula to get an investor to say yes and buy into their dream and their business. (more…)

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The 4 Pillars of Wealth and Abundance

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Have you ever wondered what the formula for a wealthy and abundant life is? Many people have. Lots has been written about the subject of wealth creation and living an abundant life. It was a breaking point in my journey and pursuit of success when I found out that there is a clear path to achieve success in life. Thanks to those who have shared their journey, we can clearly see and follow the principles of prosperity. (more…)

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Here Are 4 Reasons Why You Should Have a Podcast, Youtube Channel or Online Show

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why you should have a podcast
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Confidence comes from a place of strong understanding of self. After close to three years on radio, I’ve grown from a shy introvert to a shy introvert with an extrovert persona. When the mic is turned on, I can channel a version of myself that some say is attractive, strong, and of course, confident but it wasn’t always this way.

What I want to share with you is what I discovered on this journey into broadcast that you can apply to your life, your ventures, and your personal development. This doesn’t require any fancy gear. It does require a leap of faith on your part because once you go down the road of media; it can change your life.

1. Perceived Expertise

When you go to a doctor, you expect their knowledge will guide them to a solution to your problems. When you have a show, you become your listeners’ doctor. For all the multiple thousands, maybe millions, of YouTube channels, podcasts, and user-created content in the world, each person that gets behind a mic takes a position on their passion, their opinions, and their themes.

They challenge the status quo for the benefit of their listeners in hopes to entertain and educate. With consistency on your side, those fans place you on a platform and give you permission to influence them.

2. Global Acknowledgement

One of the benefits to increasing confidence is when you receive thank you notes from people you may never meet. The feeling of enriching someone’s life from halfway around the globe, provides validation you’re enhancing someone else’s life with your wisdom and your wit.

The very first time I was told I was making a difference in someone’s life in a country other than my own, I felt like I caused massive impact that transcends my circle of influence. When you experience just how much you can cause impact and it comes back to you, it’ll change your worldview.

“Be grateful for what you have and stop complaining – it bores everybody else, does you no good, and doesn’t solve any problems.” – Zig Ziglar

3. Backed By Numbers

One of the most exciting ways to measure success is to quantify your growth. It’s not enough to just broadcast. Having subscribers and downloads helps to know, numerically, how well you’re doing. Word of caution. This can be a way to set yourself up for distress because of number envy but if you understand what the numbers mean; you can control the narrative of the numbers.

The major number that makes most people smile is 10,000. I’d advise it to be 1. Here’s why. As you grow in your industry, so does your reach. If you learned that the one person that subscribed totally changed for the better because of you, wouldn’t that be worth the effort?

4. Effective Communication

While it’s not talked about much, having a show is documentation. You create a dynamic account of your life, your industry, and the pulse on what’s important simply by having a show. When you find a channel to improve your communication skills, you demand attention and people will listen to you. You become more trusted as a leader and people will follow you once they believe you can lead them to their wants and needs.

“To effectively communicate, we must realize that we are all different in the way we perceive the world and use this understanding as a guide to our communication with others.” – Tony Robbins

These insights have helped many people become leaders and, ultimately, move others to their best selves. It’s worked for me and I hope it works for you. At the end of the day, it’s all about showing up and showing out.

Have you ever thought about having a radio show? If so, what would you talk about? Let us below!

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