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How To Lead When You’re Terrified Of Failure

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The first stage of growing your business requires the basics of gaining clients, selling your services, and fulfilling your services. While new, your self-reliance makes it easier to step into the newness of the situation and build your business.

As you reach the stage of scalability, you find yourself having to rely on the efforts of others. You build your team and find that you have less control over the work. You have people looking to you for leadership, direction, and encouragement. 

The weight of those responsibilities launches you into a transition that will require you to work as much on yourself as you work on your business. Each day in your business requires you to manage opportunities, problems, and people in a new way.

In short, your business requires something new of you, which is scary. Suddenly, you are wrestling with the fear of failure as you work on leading your team and business to the next level.

Failure is learning, and learning is a necessary part of success. That makes sense intellectually, but without tools and techniques to harness yourself, it will be challenging to create an environment for success to happen.

Get fear out of the driver’s seat

After the 2015 release of Inside Out, a Pixar Film about the personification of 5 emotions, stories were shared with the creators that told of the impact the movie had on its viewers. One of the stories that emerged was of a young family at their local pool. The son, a young boy, caught the eyes of his parents as he steadily marched to the highest dive board.

His parents held their breath as they watched their child climb the ladder rung by rung to the top, walk to the edge, take a breath, and proceed to dive off into the pool below. What was so amazing about this seemingly simple, normal act? 

Their son was terrified of the high dive. Imagine being so afraid that your body launches into a shivering terror over one thing that seems so easy for others. When the little boy reached his parents, they asked, “What changed? That was amazing, but how?”

The little boy shared that when he watched the film, he realized that fear was natural and healthy, but he had allowed fear to be in the driver’s seat for too long. “I just asked fear to get out of the driver’s seat and let joy have a turn.”

Courage is not the absence of fear; it’s the ability to step through fear. Because fear is one of the most potent basic human emotions, you are not going to be able to rid yourself of fear, but you can learn to manage it.

“Everything you want is on the other side of fear.”  – Jack Canfield

Get it on paper

This exercise is not one to amplify your fear, but you do need to give it a name. The process of writing things by hand has an impact of pulling thoughts out of your head. When something like fear repeats over and over in your mind, it magnifies and amplifies. With this amplification, the fear grows and creates inaction because the fear seems insurmountable. Writing out the fear names it. If you name it, you can actively mitigate it.

Mitigate the Risks

“What is the worst thing that could happen?” The purpose of the question is not to find all the ways you can fail. It’s to understand what the perceived risks are. If you know what the risks are, then you can put in place watch guards and plans to reduce those risks. You can cut things off at the pass.

When you list out all of the things that could happen, you will likely find that 50% of the list is not possible or probable. 

An additional 25% of the list is more about how you fear that you’ll be perceived by others (give yourself a little grace with these). What would you say to the 10-year-old version of yourself who was about to try something new and had the same fears? You would likely extend more kindness and grace to others than you are willing to give yourself.

The remaining 25% of the list comprises risks that you can mitigate or reduce. What are the metrics you could put into place to act as an early warning system? If, in the unlikely case, these risks come to reality, what plan can you put into place?

This little exercise is more impactful than you can imagine. It puts you back in control by adopting a more strategic approach to the situation—and that’s right where you want to be.

“There is only one thing that makes a dream impossible to achieve: the fear of failure.” – Paulo Coelho

Paint the picture

In Brene Brown’s book, ‘Dare to Lead’, she tells a story of working with company leaders who liked to ‘paint it done’ by defining your expectations, the requirements, and what success will look like. You verbally paint the picture of what ‘done’ means in your vision of success. The purpose of the exercise is to define what the end result would be so that everyone has a clear expectation of what success is.

What are your expectations of the situation? If your fear is about failure, what would be heaven? How would you feel? How would you know that you achieved success? What would your team say? What would the office sound like?

Painting the picture of success is critical to achieving success. It also helps highlight when you are on the right path.

Manage the process, not the work

When it comes to your team, the fear of failure from the business owner manifests a situation where the owner micromanages the team. A business owner can quickly become angry and frustrated with their team. In the end, the fear of failure drives the business owner into paranoia and then boom—the business owner creates the physical manifestation of what they fear.

If you find yourself headed down this road, know that it is normal. This situation is a critical place of transition for you. The key is to shift your primary focus from ‘doing the work’ to ‘getting the work done.’

For many of us, there has been a certain amount of pride and value placed on our ability to do the work, to put in the hours. If your business is going to continue to grow, you need to be able to let go of the work and find value in guiding others toward a common goal.

Trust your team to get the job done. Manage the results that you are looking to achieve and allow your team to rise to the occasion. While you will have missteps in hiring and managing your team, all these learnings create a better definition of success.

You are likely to have some bumps and scrapes along the way. When that happens, take ownership and then take positive action. Ask for grace from yourself and from your team. Your team is not looking to you for perfection. They will respect you for learning along the way while everyone in the business grows and shares in the benefit of being in it together.

How do you manage to control your fear of failure? Share your thoughts and ideas with us below!

Leslie Hassler is a dynamic author, speaker, and business strategist guiding women owned, service-based businesses into more profits, cash flow, and success. Business owners come to Leslie tired, frustrated, and overwhelmed from constantly putting out fires instead of thinking strategically to scale. Using her more than 12 years of experience in business, finance, mindset, and more, Leslie takes multiple 6 and 7 figure businesses from cash-strapped and struggling to profitable and thriving with her unique Scaling Rich Method. Her genius has also been featured on stages around the United States such as the National Association of Women Business Owners, the Women’s Business Enterprise National Council, and more. If you are interested in exploring the next steps you need to take to grow your service based business to the next level, check out Leslie’s quiz here to get on the path so you can finally Scale Rich.

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In workplaces around the world, there’s a growing gap between employers and employees and between superiors and their teams. It’s a common refrain: “People don’t leave companies, they leave bad bosses.”

While there are, of course, cases where management could do better, this isn’t just a “bad boss” problem. The relationship between leaders and employees is complex. Instead of assigning blame, we should explore practical solutions to build stronger, healthier workplaces where everyone thrives.

Why This Gap Exists

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What if, instead of focusing on blame, we focused on building trust, empathy, and communication? This is where modern leadership and human-centered management can make a difference.

Tools and Techniques to Bridge the Gap

Here are proven strategies leaders and employees can use to foster stronger relationships and create a workplace where people actually want to stay.

1. Practice Mutual Empathy

Both managers and employees need to recognize they are ultimately on the same team. Leaders have to balance people and performance, and often face intense pressure to hit targets. Employees who understand this reality are more likely to cooperate and problem-solve collaboratively.

2. Maintain Professional Boundaries

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3. Follow the Golden Rule

Treat people how you would like to be treated. This simple principle encourages compassion and respect, two qualities every effective leader must demonstrate.

4. Avoid Micromanagement

Micromanaging stifles creativity and damages morale. Great leaders see themselves as partners, not just bosses, and treat their teams as collaborators working toward a shared goal.

5. Empower Employees to Grow

Empowerment means giving employees responsibility that matches their capacity, and then trusting them to deliver. Encourage them to take calculated risks, learn from mistakes, and problem-solve independently. If something goes wrong, turn it into a learning opportunity, not a reprimand.

6. Communicate in All Directions

Communication shouldn’t just be top-down. Invite feedback, create open channels for suggestions, and genuinely listen to what your people have to say. Healthy upward communication closes gaps before they become conflicts.

7. Overcome Insecurities

Many leaders secretly fear being outshone by younger, more tech-savvy employees. Instead of resisting, embrace the chance to learn from them. Humility earns respect and helps the team innovate faster.

8. Invest in Coaching and Mentorship

True leaders grow other leaders. Provide mentorship, career guidance, and stretch opportunities so employees can develop new skills. Leadership is learned through experience, but guided experience is even more powerful.

9. Eliminate Favoritism

Avoid cliques and office politics. Decisions should be based on facts and fairness, not gossip. Objective, transparent decision-making builds credibility.

10. Recognize Efforts Promptly

Recognition often matters more than rewards. Publicly appreciate employees’ contributions and do so consistently and fairly. A timely “thank you” can be more motivating than a quarterly bonus.

11. Conduct Thoughtful Exit Interviews

When employees leave, treat it as an opportunity to learn. Keep interviews confidential and use the insights to improve management practices and culture.

12. Provide Leadership Development

Train managers to lead, not just supervise. Leadership development programs help shift mindsets from “command and control” to “coach and empower.” This transformation has a direct impact on morale and retention.

13. Adopt Soft Leadership Principles

Today’s workforce, largely millennials and Gen Z, value collaboration over hierarchy. Soft leadership focuses on partnership, mutual respect, and shared purpose, rather than rigid top-down control.

The Bigger Picture: HR’s Role

Mercer’s global research highlights five key priorities for organizations:

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  • Embrace flexible work models

  • Design compelling career paths

  • Simplify HR processes

  • Redefine the value HR brings

The challenge? Employers and employees often view these priorities differently. Bridging that perception gap is just as important as bridging the relational gap between leaders and staff.

Treat Employees Like Associates, Not Just Staff

When you treat employees like partners, they bring their best selves to work. HR leaders must develop strategies to keep talent engaged, empowered, and prepared for the future.

Organizational success starts with people, always. Build the relationship with your team first, and the results will follow.

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