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50 Life Lessons Every One Should Know By The Age Of 50

Joel Brown

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The following 50 valuable life lessons where written by Regina Brett, from Cleveland , Ohio.

These gems of knowledge have been learnt over the past 50 years, why would you not want to get your knowledge up and read on for a little ‘Life 101’.

 

50 Life Lessons

1. Life isn’t fair, but it’s still good.

2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.

3. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.

4. Don’t take yourself so seriously. No one else does.

5. Pay off your credit cards every month.

6. You don’t have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.

7. Cry with someone. It’s more healing than crying alone.

8. It’s OK to get angry with God. He can take it.

9. Save for retirement starting with your first paycheck.

10. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.

11. Make peace with your past so it won’t screw up the present.

12. It’s OK to let your children see you cry.

13. Don’t compare your life to others’. You have no idea what their journey is all about.

14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn’t be in it.

15. Everything can change in the blink of an eye. But don’t worry; God never blinks.

16. Life is too short for long pity parties. Get busy living, or get busy dying.

17. You can get through anything if you stay put in today.

18. A writer writes. If you want to be a writer, write.

19. It’s never too late to have a happy childhood. But the second one is up to you and no one else.

20. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don’t take no for an answer.

21. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie. Don’t save it for a special occasion. Today is special.

22. Overprepare, then go with the flow.

23. Be eccentric now. Don’t wait for old age to wear purple.

24. The most important sex organ is the brain.

25. No one is in charge of your happiness except you.

26. Frame every so-called disaster with these words: “In five years, will this matter?”

27. Always choose life.

28. Forgive everyone everything.

29. What other people think of you is none of your business.

30. Time heals almost everything. Give time time.

31. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.

32. Your job won’t take care of you when you are sick. Your friends will. Stay in touch.

33. Believe in miracles.

34. God loves you because of who God is, not because of anything you did or didn’t do.

35. Whatever doesn’t kill you really does make you stronger.

36. Growing old beats the alternative – dying young.

37. Your children get only one childhood. Make it memorable.

38. Read the Psalms. They cover every human emotion.

39. Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.

40. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else’s, we’d grab ours back.

41. Don’t audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.

42. Get rid of anything that isn’t useful, beautiful or joyful.

43. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.

44. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.

45. The best is yet to come.

46. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.

47. Take a deep breath. It calms the mind.

48. If you don’t ask, you don’t get.

49. Yield.

50. Life isn’t tied with a bow, but it’s still a gift.

 

Written By Regina Brett | The Plain Dealer

I am the the Founder of Addicted2Success.com and I am so grateful you're here to be part of this awesome community. I love connecting with people who have a passion for Entrepreneurship, Self Development & Achieving Success. I started this website with the intention of educating and inspiring likeminded people to always strive for success no matter what their circumstances. I'm proud to say through my podcast and through this website we have impacted over 100 million lives in the last 6 and a half years.

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23 Comments

23 Comments

  1. Nancy

    Sep 9, 2017 at 7:53 am

    keep up the good work. Thanks for your share and effort, better than other sites. This is the kind of information that are meant to be shared around the internet.

  2. Domo

    Jul 17, 2016 at 9:22 am

    Comment: Awesome words !

  3. John Gardner

    Sep 19, 2013 at 11:35 am

    Not just for people approaching 50. I teach high school band and will use #11, #24, #38, #40 to deal with specific, current “drama” going on between some of our teens.

  4. V Srinivasan

    Apr 11, 2013 at 12:42 am

    a message which one should read and follow

  5. Brain E

    Dec 28, 2012 at 11:02 am

    51. You don’t need an imaginary friend in the sky to enjoy life.

    • Home Biz Tax Coach

      Jan 3, 2013 at 1:21 pm

      Live and let live

    • Ta'Mara Brown

      Apr 8, 2013 at 7:49 am

      Did you imagine yourself here on Earth Brain E? Did you imagine the start of all creation? Have you imagined the other side of death when your life is over? Imagine yourself telling the Creator of the Universe your ‘comment’ when you go to meet your maker… Will you have the same boldness and attitude?
      Imagine telling the Son of God who died for you, the same thing… Can you imagine what hell will be like for the fate of those who choose NOT to believe in the obvious God and Jesus Christ, whom modern science has even proven existed, died, and rose from the tomb in which he was laid to rest after being killed and sacrificed for you and me…
      He’s more than a friend in the sky. I challenge you to use your imagination and imagine eternity in only one of two places… Heaven or Hell.
      It’s your free choice, Jesus loves you even in the midst of such harsh offensive words.
      He is and can be your redeemer savior father and friend!
      May God bless you with the grace to be open hearted while you still have time.
      He loves even you! :-)))
      Take care and God bless!

      • julien

        May 4, 2013 at 2:37 pm

        Everyone has the right to believe in what they want, no need to lecture others since they have different views. You live your life to the fullest and let them live theirs.

        • angela

          May 17, 2013 at 1:05 pm

          i love you julien, you are the best

      • Chris

        Dec 17, 2013 at 4:44 am

        look i think a lot of these are really good lessons but the God stuff I try to ignore so i can believe in the correct lessons you say. Just understand not everyone believes in the stuff you do and stating these lessons with a closed mind like this is going to lose non religious peoples’ attention. And it makes me feel like you have something against people who don’t believe in Christianity which is a majority of humans who either believe in another religion or none. You can’t expect non Christians to take Christian lessons seriously.
        What if all your Christian lessons were replaced with Hindu lessons for example? Might as well rename topic “life lessons for Christians”.

        -ta mara brown, You can tell everyone what you believe, but I shouldn’t have to explain the difference of telling people what you believe and why we should find credibility in what you believe.

    • Wm. Derek Graham.

      Mar 29, 2014 at 9:15 pm

      You’ll change your mind when you meet Him.

  6. charles

    Dec 14, 2012 at 8:04 pm

    I read this almost everyday, I say keep the list going or start a new one that updates with great tips on how to live a better life.

  7. The Old Dog

    Dec 4, 2012 at 1:31 am

    Excellent! I learned many of these the hard way unfortunately. 😉

    I’m closing in on 50 now and must say that each decade has been better than the one before. I expect my 50s to be the best yet!

  8. Victor

    Sep 30, 2012 at 4:18 pm

    “Pay off your credit cards every month.” – best advice and lesson ever! 🙂

  9. Jac

    Sep 30, 2012 at 12:54 pm

    Thanks for this cool list. I really enjoyed it.

    Here’s one to add maybe for the 51st year: “Wisdom comes not from always being right, but from learning from all the mistakes you made”.

  10. Mark

    Sep 29, 2012 at 3:24 pm

    Wow, thanks for several reminders.

  11. Andy

    Sep 23, 2012 at 10:39 am

    I’ve read a quote:
    “listen to your elder advise not because they are always right. but because they have more experiences of being wrong..”

    thanx for post it, it gives me more advise from the elders 😀

  12. Sue Sanders

    Sep 22, 2012 at 11:11 pm

    Great List!! Thinking of and praying for ya’ll!

  13. Maja

    Sep 21, 2012 at 9:27 pm

    Some really nice and wise advice there. A good read 🙂

  14. Anna

    Sep 21, 2012 at 1:54 pm

    Excellent. Thank you!

  15. Amandah

    Sep 21, 2012 at 12:58 pm

    Great list!

    It’s true that life isn’t fair sometimes. Learn from your mistakes and go around the obstacles in front of you — don’t struggle to bulldoze through them. You never know what valuable lessons they have to teach you.

  16. mofokeng july

    Sep 21, 2012 at 12:32 pm

    I feel healed already,this makes me wanna go out there and make success of my life.

    • Dorian

      Nov 5, 2012 at 6:57 pm

      #11 really spoke to me. It was extremely hard to make peace with my past.

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Life

How Never Giving Up Can Lead You From Pain and Suffering to Ease and Joy

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never give up

I struggled with many aspects of life early on such as growing up in challenging circumstances and getting bullied at school. I read my first self-development book at 13 and attended many courses and workshops, but nothing I encountered made the difference for me. It was only once I found a set of energetic processes and tools which I now use in my life and my work that I was able to turn things around.

Today, I get to write for you about my experiences, run a thriving mentoring and healing practice and travel to attend classes and events.

Here are some of the things I’ve done/learned along the way:

1. I took responsibility for my actions

I believe we attract all our experiences in order to learn from them. It is tough when we go through things we don’t know how to handle and experience pain, fear and anxiety as a result.  

This leaves us many emotions to release and a skill gap to bridge, which if done right, allows us to develop a level of confidence about how to turn experience into awareness and integrate our learning into wisdom for future ease and higher outcomes.

For me, learning to let go was hard (we are not taught this and I kept feeling like I had to hold onto things to protect myself). After a while, I came to the decision that “It’s not what’s happened to me, it’s how I deal with it that matters”.

Choosing from this space was empowering and allowed me to move from regret and develop a sense of purpose from my experiences.

2. I jumped off the cliff without a parachute and became inspired and trusting on the way down

I had gotten to the point where if I stayed where I was, I would die. I didn’t know how my life would look or who I would become in the process of changing, yet I knew if I was going to survive I had to become a radically different version of me.

Once I made that decision, I found the tools I was looking for that were relatable, fun and powerful. I began to change my thoughts, feelings and emotions and way of viewing the world.

After a while, instead of using personal development to escape the pain of my life, I became addicted to pursuing the highest version of myself and curious how much change and transformation I could create. I was having fun!

I began to ask what was possible for me I’d never imagined and realized that who I actually am is completely different from who I had thought I wanted to become. I discovered my soul purpose was connected to my inner work and my years of struggle and transformation meant that I had something valuable to offer others.

“What we are waiting for is not as important as what happens to us while we are waiting. Trust the process.” – Mandy Hale

3. I had the unshakeable belief something else was possible

As growth, healing, and expansion became my highest goal, the details filled themselves in. The right people and things showed up to trigger my growth and to support me which helped me be less fearful, and more able to give and receive love from others.

I lost layers of accumulated emotional garbage and started to connect with my power and purpose. I stopped telling my victim story (except to inspire others) and I began to trust myself and have faith in life again to have my back.

4. I made heaps of mistakes and instead of feeling bad about it, I felt determined, courageous and free

This part was tough. There were setbacks, embarrassments, discouragements and challenges but I wasn’t going to give in and quit.  

I had to suck at some things in order to get better. Creating a new life from scratch is a great way to lose ego. There were a few hurdles where I would get super upset, yet giving up was never an option.

There’s no point in being upset so I sucked it up and moved on. This takes courage and feels totally weird at first, but it is so worth it.

5. I became a new version of me

In the course of recreating myself, I began to develop new attributes. I was so focusing on changing, I didn’t notice what was different about me at first.

Every few months I would write my goals and it wasn’t until I would check them that I began to realize how much I’d accomplished in the process of changing me.

This became clearer whenever I would run across someone who I once looked up to because their life suddenly looked smaller than I remembered. While they had been comfortable and barely moving, I had plodded past them like the proverbial tortoise. As I stay on this trajectory, the benefits and changes multiply exponentially over time.

“Every day, you reinvent yourself. You’re always in motion. But you decide every day: forward or backward.” – James Altucher

6. I became open to new ideas and concepts

In the process of being cracked wide open by life, I became curious, accepting and interested in different ideas, concepts and techniques.

Things like manifesting, consciousness, spirituality and other ‘strange’ ideas became my friends.  After years of trying to create change via psychological means, effort, willpower and implementing traditional tools of personal development, I found my wheelhouse in the different.

Today I am grateful for my early adversity and my own persistence and determination. Without them, who I am today would have remained undiscovered and I wouldn’t get to do the cool stuff I do with other people. I am grateful for the amazing tools and information around today, which can make the journey so much easier.

What helps you keep moving when you feel like giving up? Let us know in the comments below!

Image courtesy of Twenty20.com

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Life

As Bad As Smoking? 3 Reasons to Occasionally Unplug From Technology

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take a break from technology

A popular meme reads: “I’m having people over to stare at their phones later if you want to come by…” It’s kind of funny in an alarming way since many people would consider walking barefoot across flaming hot coals before parting with their smartphones for a few weeks.

As useful as things like the Internet and mobile devices are, taking time to occasionally unplug is a good habit. Even if for no other reason than to develop your willpower and avoid being too heavily addicted to your wireless toy.

Consider the following three reasons for periodically unplugging from technology and taking a minute to smell the roses:

1. Face-To-Face Interaction

As useful as social media is for things like marketing, maintaining contact with old friends and sending messages across the world in the blink of an eye, there’s no substitute for a friendly meeting and a firm handshake.

There are few things in life that have more potential to increase our happiness than building good relationships with the people around us. Taking the effort to postpone the reading and answering of your latest text message in order to listen and offer attention to the person in front of you can be a great way to improve relationships and show people you care.

If you want a more practical and success-driven reason, then consider the fact that developing a healthy network is one of the most powerful ways to successfully grow your business or career. Spending a business lunch or golf game glued to your touchscreen is a lousy way to build that network.

2. Creative Thinking

Creativity is another powerful asset in your effort to expand your success, solve your problems and increase your happiness. Getting in the habit of frequent, diligent reading (an activity often performed with mobile devices) is essential in developing your creative capacity. In addition, investing alone time to occasionally take a step back to think, review options and consider possible solutions towards life’s struggles is a great quality.

Making a habit of doing so can be beneficial for planning your career, planning an exciting night out on the town with your spouse, planning how to discipline your teenager and plenty more.

“Great is the human who has not lost his childlike heart.” – Mencius

3. Health Concerns

The health risks caused by electromagnetic frequencies (EMFs) are numerous and not to be ignored. Health damaging EMFs are emitted by various types of electronic devices including cellphones, tablets and laptops among others. Although pretending these dangers don’t exist may seem convenient, there’s nothing convenient about dealing with the consequences. Some have even suggested that cell phones may eventually prove to be as cancerous as cigarettes. Don’t believe me?

In the book ‘The Non-Tinfoil Guide To EMFs’, Nicolas Pineault writes, “A $25M study performed by the US National Toxicology Program (NTP) studied the effects of exposing rats and mice to an amount of cellphone radiation equivalent to what a human would get by talking for 30 minutes a day, for 36 years.

“As reported by Microwave News: ‘The exposed rats were found to have higher rates of two types of cancers: glioma, a tumor of the glial cells in the brain, and malignant schwannoma of the heart, a very rare tumor. None of the unexposed control rats developed either type of tumor.’

“The irony is the whole reason John Bucher, the senior manager of the NTP study, wanted his agency to run this study is to prove once and for all that cellphones do not cause cancer.”

Swearing off technology is probably not the most practical solution. (Although if that’s your thing, then rock on.) That said, occasionally taking a break from technology and spending some time in nature might help counteract some of the negative effects.

Bonus: Stress Reduction

With so many people in our culture complaining of excessive stress and/or taking antidepressants, it makes sense to proactively take steps to reduce stress before it builds up so much that you experience a nervous breakdown.

I don’t know about you, but when I get away from the computer or turn off my mobile device for a bit, I can feel the difference. If I’ve been working on my laptop or tablet for too long, then getting away and taking a break offers a noticeable relief. I almost immediately feel calmer.

If you’ve been on your phone/tablet/computer for a while, consider taking a few minutes after you finish reading this article to leave technology behind and catch a breath of fresh air.

“The more ways we have to connect, the more many of us seem desperate to unplug.” – Pico Iyer

Are you ready to build stronger relationships? Are you ready to proactively develop creative solutions? Are you ready to start preserving your health? Are you ready to leave some of that stress behind you? If so, then it’s time to fit a periodical unplug into your schedule. You might be surprised by how much this helps.

How many hours of the day do you use your phone? Are you being productive on it? Let us know in the comments below so we can help one another.

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Life

3 Ways to Have More Time by Living More Proactively

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We live in a reactive world. We feel compelled to check and respond to digital tools at a moment’s notice. A few minutes here and a few there checking email, responding to Slack messages, and replying to Facebook posts add up to a significant amount of time over the course of a day, week, and month. This precious time could be spent writing a book, training for a race, or being with your kids.

There’s a better way: live proactively. It means starting each day with purpose by taking control of what you do and when you do it. Embrace the proactive habits below and you’ll be amazed at what you accomplish.

1. Know Where Your Time Goes

It’s critical to start every day with a plan that details what you’re going to do and when. Take a few minutes each evening to create a schedule for the day ahead, hour-by-hour. Note your current commitments, like “meeting from 12pm to 1pm.” Then, give yourself large chunks of time to complete your priorities for the day.  

On Monday evening you plan your day for Tuesday, which could look something like this:

6am – 8am: Write draft of article

8am – 9am: Commute to work

9am – 11am: Write report

11am – 12pm: Attend meeting

You get the idea. Without a plan, it’s too easy to spend your days reacting to others: agreeing to take on a project or deciding to attend a last-minute meeting. This is a sure-fire way to unnecessarily drag out your days, leaving you with little time for anything else.

Planning your day takes a little upfront effort, but the results pay dividends in return. You’ll get a lot done in less time.

“By failing to prepare, you are preparing to fail.” – Benjamin Franklin

2. Determine When You’re Available to Communicate

You can’t be a hermit all day, every day. You’ll have to respond to people either personally or digitally at some point. That’s why you should determine in advance when you’re available to others to answer questions and discuss issues with friends and colleagues. Experiment and find a block of time that works for you, and include it in your daily schedule.

This proactive approach gives you a block of time to handle communication, instead of here and there throughout the day—a practice that can eat away at your day. Plus, using a block of time to handle correspondence sets the expectation for others: they can’t interrupt and pepper you all day long with questions.

3. Focus, Focus, Focus

Now that you’ve got a plan in place, it’s time to hone in on the details: do one task at a time. This way of working is at odds with the rest of the world, since it’s popular today to multitask. It’s common to see employees working on one monitor and responding to Slack messages on another. But there’s a problem with multitasking: it doesn’t work.

When we “multitask,” we’re not really doing multiple things at once. Rather, we’re doing “individual actions in rapid succession,” as pointed out by the Cleveland Clinic. We are in fact “mono-taskers.”

Eliminating digital distractions helps you to focus completely on the task at hand. Put your smartphone on silent and move it out of sight so you’re not tempted to check it while working. Close your email and Slack tabs. In other words, proactively eliminate digital and physical clutter, and you’ll find you get more quality work done when you focus and do things one at a time.

“What I’ve learned in these 11 years is you just got to stay focused and believe in yourself and trust your own ability and judgment.” – Mark Cuban

Above all, living proactively is a shift in mindset. Instead of saying “let’s see what blows up at the office today” and reacting to every whim, begin the day with purpose and be proactive with your time and attention—both are limited.

How do you make sure you use your time wisely? Let us know by commenting below!

Image courtesy of Twenty20.com

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Life

9 Tips to Increase Your Charisma and Charm

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Most of us can probably name a person or two who can walk into a room and instantly become the center of attention. Some people seem to have a sort of natural charisma making them successful in social situations.

On the other hand, plenty of people out there lack any sort of natural charisma. They can be the smartest person in the world, but put them in a party and ask them to make friends and they become clueless. While it is possible to go through life without any charisma, not being able to carry on a conversation and not being able to make friends easily can make your life significantly harder. Thankfully, there are ways to make yourself more charismatic and more charming.

Here are 9 proven tips that will help make you more charismatic:

1. Learn proper posture

One simple way to make yourself more charismatic to those around you is to have proper posture. You should sit up straight and make yourself as tall as possible. Do not lean on your elbows or do anything like that. Sit up straight with your hands either at your sides or in front of you.

Believe it or not, having correct posture actually makes you feel more confident, which then makes you feel more willing to engage in conversation. When you are more willing to engage in conversation, you will appear more charismatic and more charming to those around you.

2. Do not underestimate the power of physical contact

Part of being charismatic is knowing when physical contact is needed. Uncharismatic people tend to shun physical contact and often do not know when to do it appropriately.

So, if you want to be more charismatic, then you should master when physical contact is appropriate and when it is not. For example, if a friend is crying or very upset, a hand on the shoulder or a hug (depending on how close of a friend they are) is appropriate.

Sometimes physical contact is even more appropriate than mere words.

3. Learn to recognize nonverbal cues

Very often people will not state how they are feeling. People will tell you they are feeling fine, even when deep down they are not. However, just because they do not say how they feel does not mean they do not give any clues.

You can often tell how a person is feeling about something based on facial expressions or body language. This should tell you what sort of mood they are in and how you should interact with them. We often associate charisma with things like telling good stories or making people laugh, yet a big part of charisma is simply knowing what sorts of things to say (or not to say) to people. Part of the way you figure out what to say to people is by reading their body language.

“I speak two languages, Body and English.” – Mae West

4. Know when to use humor

A big part of being charismatic is knowing how to use humor. Know when to make jokes and what sort of jokes to make. Too often, people constantly throw out jokes on the false assumption that it makes them likable. However, the timing of a joke is just as important as its contents. Making jokes at the wrong time makes you come off as uncharismatic. So, read the mood of others around you before throwing out a joke.

5. Learn to ask questions

We usually do not consider asking questions to be “charismatic,” but asking questions, and specifically the right kind of questions, is a great way to keep a conversation going.

People love to talk about themselves and they love to talk about what they are interested in. Charismatic people know this, which is why a charismatic person will spend as little time talking about themselves as possible.

Plus, by asking questions, you can find common areas of interest, which will allow you to expand your conversation topics.

6. Know how to listen effectively

This point goes hand-in-hand with the last one. Not only should you learn how to ask questions, but you should also learn to how to listen.

We all know that cliché about how women like men who are good listeners, well it is true and it applies to everyone, not just women. Sometimes, people simply want to talk to someone who will actually listen to their problems.

Knowing how to be a good listener will make people like you more since good listeners are so rare.

“When people talk, listen completely. Most people never listen.”- Ernest Hemingway

7. Memorize as many names as you can

This is a really small, but effective tip for coming across as more charismatic. Remembering a person’s name is a great way of signaling to them that they are important, which makes them feel better. Again, this is a very small tip, but you will be surprised at how much more charismatic you come across if you consistently remember people’s names.

8. Learn to talk with your hands

Believe it or not, using hand gestures while talking does make you come across as more charismatic. Now, we don’t mean that you should be swinging your hands around, but some light hand gestures while telling a story can help make people more engrossed in what you are saying. So, next time you want to really get people interested in what you are saying, try putting down whatever is in your hands and add in some gestures.

9. Cut out filler from your vocabulary

We all occasionally throw in an “umm” or an “uuuh” when talking (especially if we are telling a long story), but you should try cut down on the number of times that you use filler words like the ones we just mentioned. A hallmark of charisma is being able to talk for a long time without using a lot of filler. The best way to go about this is to simply keep track of how often you use filler words and slowly work on improving your speaking skills.

Which one of these tips are you going to start to implement? Let us know by commenting below!

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3 Practical Ways Successful People Attract Money

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23 Comments

23 Comments

  1. Nancy

    Sep 9, 2017 at 7:53 am

    keep up the good work. Thanks for your share and effort, better than other sites. This is the kind of information that are meant to be shared around the internet.

  2. Domo

    Jul 17, 2016 at 9:22 am

    Comment: Awesome words !

  3. John Gardner

    Sep 19, 2013 at 11:35 am

    Not just for people approaching 50. I teach high school band and will use #11, #24, #38, #40 to deal with specific, current “drama” going on between some of our teens.

  4. V Srinivasan

    Apr 11, 2013 at 12:42 am

    a message which one should read and follow

  5. Brain E

    Dec 28, 2012 at 11:02 am

    51. You don’t need an imaginary friend in the sky to enjoy life.

    • Home Biz Tax Coach

      Jan 3, 2013 at 1:21 pm

      Live and let live

    • Ta'Mara Brown

      Apr 8, 2013 at 7:49 am

      Did you imagine yourself here on Earth Brain E? Did you imagine the start of all creation? Have you imagined the other side of death when your life is over? Imagine yourself telling the Creator of the Universe your ‘comment’ when you go to meet your maker… Will you have the same boldness and attitude?
      Imagine telling the Son of God who died for you, the same thing… Can you imagine what hell will be like for the fate of those who choose NOT to believe in the obvious God and Jesus Christ, whom modern science has even proven existed, died, and rose from the tomb in which he was laid to rest after being killed and sacrificed for you and me…
      He’s more than a friend in the sky. I challenge you to use your imagination and imagine eternity in only one of two places… Heaven or Hell.
      It’s your free choice, Jesus loves you even in the midst of such harsh offensive words.
      He is and can be your redeemer savior father and friend!
      May God bless you with the grace to be open hearted while you still have time.
      He loves even you! :-)))
      Take care and God bless!

      • julien

        May 4, 2013 at 2:37 pm

        Everyone has the right to believe in what they want, no need to lecture others since they have different views. You live your life to the fullest and let them live theirs.

        • angela

          May 17, 2013 at 1:05 pm

          i love you julien, you are the best

      • Chris

        Dec 17, 2013 at 4:44 am

        look i think a lot of these are really good lessons but the God stuff I try to ignore so i can believe in the correct lessons you say. Just understand not everyone believes in the stuff you do and stating these lessons with a closed mind like this is going to lose non religious peoples’ attention. And it makes me feel like you have something against people who don’t believe in Christianity which is a majority of humans who either believe in another religion or none. You can’t expect non Christians to take Christian lessons seriously.
        What if all your Christian lessons were replaced with Hindu lessons for example? Might as well rename topic “life lessons for Christians”.

        -ta mara brown, You can tell everyone what you believe, but I shouldn’t have to explain the difference of telling people what you believe and why we should find credibility in what you believe.

    • Wm. Derek Graham.

      Mar 29, 2014 at 9:15 pm

      You’ll change your mind when you meet Him.

  6. charles

    Dec 14, 2012 at 8:04 pm

    I read this almost everyday, I say keep the list going or start a new one that updates with great tips on how to live a better life.

  7. The Old Dog

    Dec 4, 2012 at 1:31 am

    Excellent! I learned many of these the hard way unfortunately. 😉

    I’m closing in on 50 now and must say that each decade has been better than the one before. I expect my 50s to be the best yet!

  8. Victor

    Sep 30, 2012 at 4:18 pm

    “Pay off your credit cards every month.” – best advice and lesson ever! 🙂

  9. Jac

    Sep 30, 2012 at 12:54 pm

    Thanks for this cool list. I really enjoyed it.

    Here’s one to add maybe for the 51st year: “Wisdom comes not from always being right, but from learning from all the mistakes you made”.

  10. Mark

    Sep 29, 2012 at 3:24 pm

    Wow, thanks for several reminders.

  11. Andy

    Sep 23, 2012 at 10:39 am

    I’ve read a quote:
    “listen to your elder advise not because they are always right. but because they have more experiences of being wrong..”

    thanx for post it, it gives me more advise from the elders 😀

  12. Sue Sanders

    Sep 22, 2012 at 11:11 pm

    Great List!! Thinking of and praying for ya’ll!

  13. Maja

    Sep 21, 2012 at 9:27 pm

    Some really nice and wise advice there. A good read 🙂

  14. Anna

    Sep 21, 2012 at 1:54 pm

    Excellent. Thank you!

  15. Amandah

    Sep 21, 2012 at 12:58 pm

    Great list!

    It’s true that life isn’t fair sometimes. Learn from your mistakes and go around the obstacles in front of you — don’t struggle to bulldoze through them. You never know what valuable lessons they have to teach you.

  16. mofokeng july

    Sep 21, 2012 at 12:32 pm

    I feel healed already,this makes me wanna go out there and make success of my life.

    • Dorian

      Nov 5, 2012 at 6:57 pm

      #11 really spoke to me. It was extremely hard to make peace with my past.

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Life

How Never Giving Up Can Lead You From Pain and Suffering to Ease and Joy

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I struggled with many aspects of life early on such as growing up in challenging circumstances and getting bullied at school. I read my first self-development book at 13 and attended many courses and workshops, but nothing I encountered made the difference for me. It was only once I found a set of energetic processes and tools which I now use in my life and my work that I was able to turn things around.

Today, I get to write for you about my experiences, run a thriving mentoring and healing practice and travel to attend classes and events.

Here are some of the things I’ve done/learned along the way:

1. I took responsibility for my actions

I believe we attract all our experiences in order to learn from them. It is tough when we go through things we don’t know how to handle and experience pain, fear and anxiety as a result.  

This leaves us many emotions to release and a skill gap to bridge, which if done right, allows us to develop a level of confidence about how to turn experience into awareness and integrate our learning into wisdom for future ease and higher outcomes.

For me, learning to let go was hard (we are not taught this and I kept feeling like I had to hold onto things to protect myself). After a while, I came to the decision that “It’s not what’s happened to me, it’s how I deal with it that matters”.

Choosing from this space was empowering and allowed me to move from regret and develop a sense of purpose from my experiences.

2. I jumped off the cliff without a parachute and became inspired and trusting on the way down

I had gotten to the point where if I stayed where I was, I would die. I didn’t know how my life would look or who I would become in the process of changing, yet I knew if I was going to survive I had to become a radically different version of me.

Once I made that decision, I found the tools I was looking for that were relatable, fun and powerful. I began to change my thoughts, feelings and emotions and way of viewing the world.

After a while, instead of using personal development to escape the pain of my life, I became addicted to pursuing the highest version of myself and curious how much change and transformation I could create. I was having fun!

I began to ask what was possible for me I’d never imagined and realized that who I actually am is completely different from who I had thought I wanted to become. I discovered my soul purpose was connected to my inner work and my years of struggle and transformation meant that I had something valuable to offer others.

“What we are waiting for is not as important as what happens to us while we are waiting. Trust the process.” – Mandy Hale

3. I had the unshakeable belief something else was possible

As growth, healing, and expansion became my highest goal, the details filled themselves in. The right people and things showed up to trigger my growth and to support me which helped me be less fearful, and more able to give and receive love from others.

I lost layers of accumulated emotional garbage and started to connect with my power and purpose. I stopped telling my victim story (except to inspire others) and I began to trust myself and have faith in life again to have my back.

4. I made heaps of mistakes and instead of feeling bad about it, I felt determined, courageous and free

This part was tough. There were setbacks, embarrassments, discouragements and challenges but I wasn’t going to give in and quit.  

I had to suck at some things in order to get better. Creating a new life from scratch is a great way to lose ego. There were a few hurdles where I would get super upset, yet giving up was never an option.

There’s no point in being upset so I sucked it up and moved on. This takes courage and feels totally weird at first, but it is so worth it.

5. I became a new version of me

In the course of recreating myself, I began to develop new attributes. I was so focusing on changing, I didn’t notice what was different about me at first.

Every few months I would write my goals and it wasn’t until I would check them that I began to realize how much I’d accomplished in the process of changing me.

This became clearer whenever I would run across someone who I once looked up to because their life suddenly looked smaller than I remembered. While they had been comfortable and barely moving, I had plodded past them like the proverbial tortoise. As I stay on this trajectory, the benefits and changes multiply exponentially over time.

“Every day, you reinvent yourself. You’re always in motion. But you decide every day: forward or backward.” – James Altucher

6. I became open to new ideas and concepts

In the process of being cracked wide open by life, I became curious, accepting and interested in different ideas, concepts and techniques.

Things like manifesting, consciousness, spirituality and other ‘strange’ ideas became my friends.  After years of trying to create change via psychological means, effort, willpower and implementing traditional tools of personal development, I found my wheelhouse in the different.

Today I am grateful for my early adversity and my own persistence and determination. Without them, who I am today would have remained undiscovered and I wouldn’t get to do the cool stuff I do with other people. I am grateful for the amazing tools and information around today, which can make the journey so much easier.

What helps you keep moving when you feel like giving up? Let us know in the comments below!

Image courtesy of Twenty20.com

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Life

As Bad As Smoking? 3 Reasons to Occasionally Unplug From Technology

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take a break from technology

A popular meme reads: “I’m having people over to stare at their phones later if you want to come by…” It’s kind of funny in an alarming way since many people would consider walking barefoot across flaming hot coals before parting with their smartphones for a few weeks.

As useful as things like the Internet and mobile devices are, taking time to occasionally unplug is a good habit. Even if for no other reason than to develop your willpower and avoid being too heavily addicted to your wireless toy.

Consider the following three reasons for periodically unplugging from technology and taking a minute to smell the roses:

1. Face-To-Face Interaction

As useful as social media is for things like marketing, maintaining contact with old friends and sending messages across the world in the blink of an eye, there’s no substitute for a friendly meeting and a firm handshake.

There are few things in life that have more potential to increase our happiness than building good relationships with the people around us. Taking the effort to postpone the reading and answering of your latest text message in order to listen and offer attention to the person in front of you can be a great way to improve relationships and show people you care.

If you want a more practical and success-driven reason, then consider the fact that developing a healthy network is one of the most powerful ways to successfully grow your business or career. Spending a business lunch or golf game glued to your touchscreen is a lousy way to build that network.

2. Creative Thinking

Creativity is another powerful asset in your effort to expand your success, solve your problems and increase your happiness. Getting in the habit of frequent, diligent reading (an activity often performed with mobile devices) is essential in developing your creative capacity. In addition, investing alone time to occasionally take a step back to think, review options and consider possible solutions towards life’s struggles is a great quality.

Making a habit of doing so can be beneficial for planning your career, planning an exciting night out on the town with your spouse, planning how to discipline your teenager and plenty more.

“Great is the human who has not lost his childlike heart.” – Mencius

3. Health Concerns

The health risks caused by electromagnetic frequencies (EMFs) are numerous and not to be ignored. Health damaging EMFs are emitted by various types of electronic devices including cellphones, tablets and laptops among others. Although pretending these dangers don’t exist may seem convenient, there’s nothing convenient about dealing with the consequences. Some have even suggested that cell phones may eventually prove to be as cancerous as cigarettes. Don’t believe me?

In the book ‘The Non-Tinfoil Guide To EMFs’, Nicolas Pineault writes, “A $25M study performed by the US National Toxicology Program (NTP) studied the effects of exposing rats and mice to an amount of cellphone radiation equivalent to what a human would get by talking for 30 minutes a day, for 36 years.

“As reported by Microwave News: ‘The exposed rats were found to have higher rates of two types of cancers: glioma, a tumor of the glial cells in the brain, and malignant schwannoma of the heart, a very rare tumor. None of the unexposed control rats developed either type of tumor.’

“The irony is the whole reason John Bucher, the senior manager of the NTP study, wanted his agency to run this study is to prove once and for all that cellphones do not cause cancer.”

Swearing off technology is probably not the most practical solution. (Although if that’s your thing, then rock on.) That said, occasionally taking a break from technology and spending some time in nature might help counteract some of the negative effects.

Bonus: Stress Reduction

With so many people in our culture complaining of excessive stress and/or taking antidepressants, it makes sense to proactively take steps to reduce stress before it builds up so much that you experience a nervous breakdown.

I don’t know about you, but when I get away from the computer or turn off my mobile device for a bit, I can feel the difference. If I’ve been working on my laptop or tablet for too long, then getting away and taking a break offers a noticeable relief. I almost immediately feel calmer.

If you’ve been on your phone/tablet/computer for a while, consider taking a few minutes after you finish reading this article to leave technology behind and catch a breath of fresh air.

“The more ways we have to connect, the more many of us seem desperate to unplug.” – Pico Iyer

Are you ready to build stronger relationships? Are you ready to proactively develop creative solutions? Are you ready to start preserving your health? Are you ready to leave some of that stress behind you? If so, then it’s time to fit a periodical unplug into your schedule. You might be surprised by how much this helps.

How many hours of the day do you use your phone? Are you being productive on it? Let us know in the comments below so we can help one another.

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Life

3 Ways to Have More Time by Living More Proactively

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We live in a reactive world. We feel compelled to check and respond to digital tools at a moment’s notice. A few minutes here and a few there checking email, responding to Slack messages, and replying to Facebook posts add up to a significant amount of time over the course of a day, week, and month. This precious time could be spent writing a book, training for a race, or being with your kids.

There’s a better way: live proactively. It means starting each day with purpose by taking control of what you do and when you do it. Embrace the proactive habits below and you’ll be amazed at what you accomplish.

1. Know Where Your Time Goes

It’s critical to start every day with a plan that details what you’re going to do and when. Take a few minutes each evening to create a schedule for the day ahead, hour-by-hour. Note your current commitments, like “meeting from 12pm to 1pm.” Then, give yourself large chunks of time to complete your priorities for the day.  

On Monday evening you plan your day for Tuesday, which could look something like this:

6am – 8am: Write draft of article

8am – 9am: Commute to work

9am – 11am: Write report

11am – 12pm: Attend meeting

You get the idea. Without a plan, it’s too easy to spend your days reacting to others: agreeing to take on a project or deciding to attend a last-minute meeting. This is a sure-fire way to unnecessarily drag out your days, leaving you with little time for anything else.

Planning your day takes a little upfront effort, but the results pay dividends in return. You’ll get a lot done in less time.

“By failing to prepare, you are preparing to fail.” – Benjamin Franklin

2. Determine When You’re Available to Communicate

You can’t be a hermit all day, every day. You’ll have to respond to people either personally or digitally at some point. That’s why you should determine in advance when you’re available to others to answer questions and discuss issues with friends and colleagues. Experiment and find a block of time that works for you, and include it in your daily schedule.

This proactive approach gives you a block of time to handle communication, instead of here and there throughout the day—a practice that can eat away at your day. Plus, using a block of time to handle correspondence sets the expectation for others: they can’t interrupt and pepper you all day long with questions.

3. Focus, Focus, Focus

Now that you’ve got a plan in place, it’s time to hone in on the details: do one task at a time. This way of working is at odds with the rest of the world, since it’s popular today to multitask. It’s common to see employees working on one monitor and responding to Slack messages on another. But there’s a problem with multitasking: it doesn’t work.

When we “multitask,” we’re not really doing multiple things at once. Rather, we’re doing “individual actions in rapid succession,” as pointed out by the Cleveland Clinic. We are in fact “mono-taskers.”

Eliminating digital distractions helps you to focus completely on the task at hand. Put your smartphone on silent and move it out of sight so you’re not tempted to check it while working. Close your email and Slack tabs. In other words, proactively eliminate digital and physical clutter, and you’ll find you get more quality work done when you focus and do things one at a time.

“What I’ve learned in these 11 years is you just got to stay focused and believe in yourself and trust your own ability and judgment.” – Mark Cuban

Above all, living proactively is a shift in mindset. Instead of saying “let’s see what blows up at the office today” and reacting to every whim, begin the day with purpose and be proactive with your time and attention—both are limited.

How do you make sure you use your time wisely? Let us know by commenting below!

Image courtesy of Twenty20.com

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Life

9 Tips to Increase Your Charisma and Charm

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Most of us can probably name a person or two who can walk into a room and instantly become the center of attention. Some people seem to have a sort of natural charisma making them successful in social situations.

On the other hand, plenty of people out there lack any sort of natural charisma. They can be the smartest person in the world, but put them in a party and ask them to make friends and they become clueless. While it is possible to go through life without any charisma, not being able to carry on a conversation and not being able to make friends easily can make your life significantly harder. Thankfully, there are ways to make yourself more charismatic and more charming.

Here are 9 proven tips that will help make you more charismatic:

1. Learn proper posture

One simple way to make yourself more charismatic to those around you is to have proper posture. You should sit up straight and make yourself as tall as possible. Do not lean on your elbows or do anything like that. Sit up straight with your hands either at your sides or in front of you.

Believe it or not, having correct posture actually makes you feel more confident, which then makes you feel more willing to engage in conversation. When you are more willing to engage in conversation, you will appear more charismatic and more charming to those around you.

2. Do not underestimate the power of physical contact

Part of being charismatic is knowing when physical contact is needed. Uncharismatic people tend to shun physical contact and often do not know when to do it appropriately.

So, if you want to be more charismatic, then you should master when physical contact is appropriate and when it is not. For example, if a friend is crying or very upset, a hand on the shoulder or a hug (depending on how close of a friend they are) is appropriate.

Sometimes physical contact is even more appropriate than mere words.

3. Learn to recognize nonverbal cues

Very often people will not state how they are feeling. People will tell you they are feeling fine, even when deep down they are not. However, just because they do not say how they feel does not mean they do not give any clues.

You can often tell how a person is feeling about something based on facial expressions or body language. This should tell you what sort of mood they are in and how you should interact with them. We often associate charisma with things like telling good stories or making people laugh, yet a big part of charisma is simply knowing what sorts of things to say (or not to say) to people. Part of the way you figure out what to say to people is by reading their body language.

“I speak two languages, Body and English.” – Mae West

4. Know when to use humor

A big part of being charismatic is knowing how to use humor. Know when to make jokes and what sort of jokes to make. Too often, people constantly throw out jokes on the false assumption that it makes them likable. However, the timing of a joke is just as important as its contents. Making jokes at the wrong time makes you come off as uncharismatic. So, read the mood of others around you before throwing out a joke.

5. Learn to ask questions

We usually do not consider asking questions to be “charismatic,” but asking questions, and specifically the right kind of questions, is a great way to keep a conversation going.

People love to talk about themselves and they love to talk about what they are interested in. Charismatic people know this, which is why a charismatic person will spend as little time talking about themselves as possible.

Plus, by asking questions, you can find common areas of interest, which will allow you to expand your conversation topics.

6. Know how to listen effectively

This point goes hand-in-hand with the last one. Not only should you learn how to ask questions, but you should also learn to how to listen.

We all know that cliché about how women like men who are good listeners, well it is true and it applies to everyone, not just women. Sometimes, people simply want to talk to someone who will actually listen to their problems.

Knowing how to be a good listener will make people like you more since good listeners are so rare.

“When people talk, listen completely. Most people never listen.”- Ernest Hemingway

7. Memorize as many names as you can

This is a really small, but effective tip for coming across as more charismatic. Remembering a person’s name is a great way of signaling to them that they are important, which makes them feel better. Again, this is a very small tip, but you will be surprised at how much more charismatic you come across if you consistently remember people’s names.

8. Learn to talk with your hands

Believe it or not, using hand gestures while talking does make you come across as more charismatic. Now, we don’t mean that you should be swinging your hands around, but some light hand gestures while telling a story can help make people more engrossed in what you are saying. So, next time you want to really get people interested in what you are saying, try putting down whatever is in your hands and add in some gestures.

9. Cut out filler from your vocabulary

We all occasionally throw in an “umm” or an “uuuh” when talking (especially if we are telling a long story), but you should try cut down on the number of times that you use filler words like the ones we just mentioned. A hallmark of charisma is being able to talk for a long time without using a lot of filler. The best way to go about this is to simply keep track of how often you use filler words and slowly work on improving your speaking skills.

Which one of these tips are you going to start to implement? Let us know by commenting below!

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