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5 Kick Butt Ways to Be More Assertive

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Be More Assertive

Assertive men and women shape the world. Actions are rewarded. Thoughts and potential without assertive action lead to a heart filled with regret, and a life half-heartedly lived.

If you’re going to succeed in life, you need to be assertive. Whether success, to you, means happiness, financial freedom, or billions in assets, if you’re not assertive, you’ll not only leave a lot of your potential unfulfilled, but you’ll fail to take the risks needed in life to accomplish whatever it is that you want to accomplish.

Luckily, assertive is a learned action. It’s learned through practice. If you want to become more assertive, taking control of your life in the process, follow the steps in this article and claim the greatness that is yours for the taking.

“Take time to deliberate; but when the time for action arrives, stop thinking and go in.” – Napoleon Bonaparte

 

 

 5 Ways To Be More Assertive

 

1. Be quick to decide

Practice being assertive by being quick to decide in your everyday decisions. Know what you want to order at the cafe and the restaurant. If your spouse asks Where do you want to eat tonight? answer quickly, assertively, and be happy with that answer.

As you’re able to decide more quickly with regards to the small decisions in your life, you’ll see that carry over to the bigger decisions. Decide quickly and with a purpose behind your decisions.

 

2. Have a clear vision of what you want

Every year I write down my ideal day. I’m ruthlessly detailed down to the smells I smell, the thoughts in my mind as I wake up, and the bed I wake up in – even the dream girl I wake up next to.

You have to know what your “ideals” are in every aspect of your life. This is your deepest, most meaningful desire and want. This is what will make you truly happy. This ideal day, if it could be lived everyday for the rest of your life, will let you live a life completely without regret.

Having a clear vision of what your soul wants is important. This may be a fast car, or it may not be. Get deep, down, and honest with yourself. What we truly want in life gets lost in what our friends want, or what we think we want.

Finding clarity will help you act more assertively.

 

3. Have a clear vision of what you expect

Don’t merely set goals, set expectations. Expectations are far more powerful than goals that can be seen as pipe dreams and lofty wishes. What you expect of yourself is who you are. If you fail to adhere to your expectations, you fail to be the person you’re trying to be.

Do you expect yourself to write 5 articles a day, close 5 clients, or do one thing you’re scared to death of doing?

Your expectations should line up with your ideal day. There is, however, a catch. Don’t expect things that you can accomplish with ease. Expect bigger, more audacious accomplishments. Be the person you want to become, don’t wait for life to give you permission.

If you expect greater things from yourself, you’ll have more confidence to be more assertive and to take bold actions towards your goals.

 

4. Actively face your fears

Fear and assertiveness oppose each other. You can’t be timid and afraid and assertive. The two simply don’t mesh.

Identify what your comfort zone is.

Success – and life – exists outside of your comfort zone, but few are actually able to recognize their comfort zone because they’ve lived within it their entire lives. Write down everything that is your comfort zone.

What makes you feel safe?

Is it only taking on small projects that you know you can accomplish? Is it only calling on small clients that you know you can close? Is your comfort zone a geographical location, do you need to travel alone to break free of your comfort zone?

Write it down, then write down everything that opposes your comfort zone; your fears. These are what you should follow in life. Your fears, those things just out of your grasp, just beyond where your comforts lie, is where you’ll find life, and success.

The more fears you face, the more courage you’ll possess. Courage and assertiveness do mesh. They complement one another. As you become more courageous (because of practiced action), the more assertive you’ll become even with those things in life that scare you to death.

 

5. Act

“Whatever course you decide upon, there is always someone to tell you that you are wrong. There are always difficulties arising which tempt you to believe that your critics are right. To map out a course of action and follow it to an end requires courage.”

Far too many deliberate when they should act. Thoughtful people are praised far too greatly in our society, when it’s those who act quickly that achieve the greatest things.

People don’t follow titles, they follow courage.

Have the courage to take action when you want to continue to plan and avoid the actions you want to take. It’s in action that we become more assertive. It’s in becoming more assertive that we find success, meaning, and happiness in life.

“Using the power of decision gives you the capacity to get past any excuse to change any and every part of your life in an instant.” – Tony Robbins

 

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Some people seem to naturally know how to effectively communicate in a group setting. They can express themselves clearly and listen attentively without dominating the conversation.

Being a powerful communicator is important for several reasons, including building and maintaining relationships, achieving goals, resolving conflicts, improving productivity, leading and influencing others, advancing in your career, expressing yourself more confidently and authentically, and improving your mental and emotional well-being. Effective communication is an essential life skill that can benefit you in all aspects of your life.

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2. Use “I” statements: Speak from your own perspective and avoid placing blame or making accusations.

 

3. Avoid assumptions: Don’t make assumptions about what the other person is thinking or feeling.

 

4. Be clear: Express your thoughts and feelings clearly and concisely by getting to the point and avoid using jargon or overly complex language.

 

5. Show empathy: Show that you understand and care about the other person’s feelings.

 

6. Offer valuable insights: When speaking in a group, provide a valuable takeaway or actionable item that people can walk away with.

 

7. Be an active listener: Listen attentively and respond accordingly, incorporating your points into the conversation.

 

8. Choose the right time: Pick the most opportune time to speak to ensure that you have the group’s attention and can deliver your message without interruption.

 

9. Be the unifying voice: Step in and unify the group’s thoughts to calm down the discussion and insert your point effectively.

 

10. Keep responses concise: Keep responses short and to the point to show respect for others’ time.

 

11. Avoid unnecessary comments: Avoid commenting on everything and only speak when you have something important to say.

 

12. Cut the fluff: Avoid being long-winded and get straight to the point.

 

13. Prepare ahead of time: Sort out your points and practice them before speaking in a group.

 

14. Smile and be positive: Smile and nod along as others speak, to build a positive relationship and be respected when it’s your turn to speak.

 

15. Take responsibility: Take responsibility for your own actions and feelings.

 

16. Ask questions: Ask questions to clarify any confusion or misunderstandings.

 

17. Avoid interrupting: Allow the other person to finish speaking without interruption.

 

18. Practice active listening: Repeat what the other person said to ensure you have understood correctly.

 

19. Use your body language too: Use nonverbal cues such as eye contact, facial expressions, and body language to convey your message and build rapport.

 

20. Be aware of the tone of your voice: it should be calm and assertive, not aggressive or passive.

 

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I you want to learn how to become more confident in life then you can join my weekly mentorship calls and 40+ online workshops at AweBliss.com so you can master your life with more success.

 
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