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4 Types of Friends That are Hurting Your Dreams




4 Types of Friends That are Hurting Your Dreams

One of the greatest impacts on your dreams is the friends that you keep. Your friends will drag you down or they will build you up.

Positive influences can make everything easier while negative influences will make you feel like you’re walking in thick muck. I have allowed the wrong people to sneak into my life more than I would like to admit,   even while knowing that your friends can determine the quality and direction of your life.


Jim Rohn

Some friends we know we shouldn’t keep but some we are just naive about their negative affect on our life. If you are plateauing in life make sure that you aren’t hanging around with one of these 4 types of friends.

Here are the 4 types of friends that are hurting your success:


1. The doubter

The doubting friend always wants proof that your dream is possible. They will believe in you as long as they see it. This friend will buy in late in the game but in the early stages of chasing your dreams they will fuel your doubt. When you hang out with this friend you spend most of your time trying to convince them of the vision that you can see. This friend will describe themselves as a realist but you don’t have time to entertain this doubter.


2. The helper

This friend’s heart is right but there help is not helpful. They criticize everything, finding fault in the smallest detail. They are general with praise but specific and cutting with where they think you could have done better. In all actuality, this helper is trying to get your dream to be what they think it should be. This friend will always make you feel like your best is not good enough and increase your doubt. You don’t have time to defend against the helper.


3. The fun friend

This friend is always looking for a good time. The fun friend is a blast to be around but can get you into trouble if you aren’t careful.  Life is a party to this friend and they don’t take anything seriously. This friend may be someone you cut out completely but more than likely they are just someone you need to limit your time with. If you hang around fun friend too much you will have no time to work towards your dream.

“The best way to move forward, is to let go of the people holding you back.”

4. The me friend

This friend is so focused on themselves that the relationship is one sided. This friend has no give and take and you feel used after spending time with them. You may be an enamored attribute they have, that causes you to stay around but it’s just not worth it. In fact this friend is not a friend and should be cut out immediately. You don’t have any room to have a one sided relationship ever, but especially if you are chasing a dream.


Some friends you will need to cut out completely, others you will just need to spend less time with. You must make room for better relationships. As your inner circle changes you will be amazed at how your dreams become easier and more joyful. This journey is too hard to have negative forces within your control pulling at you. There should be no guilt for cutting off relationships. Some friendships are meant for a lifetime but many are for a season of life. Set clear boundaries and stick to them and watch your dreams take off.

Which type of friend is holding you back from your dreams? Leave your thoughts and answers in the comment section below!

Zechariah Newman builds businesses, runs marathons, and lives life with my wonderful family in southern Oregon. You can see my writing in places like Entrepreneur Magazine, Fast Company, Mind Body Green, and the Good Men Project. My goal is to help you build your business while keeping a balanced and fulfilled life. You can visit his website: and follow him on his Facebook:



  1. Avatar

    Nichole | Wildly Alive

    Dec 11, 2018 at 2:10 am

    I totally agree to this! We need to surround ourselves with people who brings the best in us, not dragging us down. And someone who are positive in life, and having a true friend to conquer life with.

  2. Avatar


    Jan 17, 2016 at 9:38 pm

    Then there are the family members who also fall into these categories. Not always as easy to cut out of your life but their attitude towards you and your dream can have a negative effect.

  3. Avatar


    Oct 17, 2015 at 4:19 pm

    And then we need to remember not to use the types of friends we have as an excuse to continue entertaining mediocrity – doing little to make the dreams we have become true.

    No matter what types of friends you have now, you still have to find the right way to make those dreams come true. For your first friend is God Almighty and He created all of us with the wisdom to discern what’s right to do and what is wrong.

  4. Avatar

    Jared Greer

    Oct 8, 2015 at 12:16 pm

    Wealth is in many cases, about proximity. If you hang around 4 broke guys, you’ll be the 5th.

    But there is also significant benefit to building a diverse network. This article could very well signal to only spend time with those who think like you and are not likely to criticize you. Success comes, however, as a result of using a network to your advantage by understanding your objectives from multiple perspectives. This is how you iterate your craft for more impact, meaning and followership. Yes, limit your time with negative people, but don’t be afraid to put your dreams in front of them.

  5. Avatar

    Jennifer Hudak

    Oct 5, 2015 at 3:07 am

    I’m glad I saw this post. I’ve had to cut a lot of people out of my life that aren’t aligned with my dreams and goals. It’s extremely difficult to cut contact with people you’ve known for a long time, but it’s even harder to keep them in your lives when you realize they are only hurting you. True friends believe in you no mater what and make a conscious effort to help you in a positive way. I remember someone once said you can determine how you feel about someone after you hang out with them. Do you feel better or worse? If worse, move on. If better, keep them in your lives!!

  6. Avatar

    Theodore Nwangene

    Oct 4, 2015 at 3:10 pm

    Great post Zach,
    Its indeed very vital to be mindful of the kind of friends we stay around because they will eventually determine our future.

    Having a doubter as a friend can really be a great mistake because, they will always come up with a thousand reason why you won’t be able to achieve what you want, they are the idea suckers and killers and will give you numerous reasons why your idea will not work but won’t border to help you figure out how it might work.

    Just stay away from any of these kind of people.

    Thanks for sharing.

  7. Avatar


    Oct 4, 2015 at 11:21 am

    A wonderful article

  8. Avatar


    Oct 3, 2015 at 1:53 pm

    Nice post. You should also add the 5th kind of friend, which is the loser friend, or the over-negative one. He is worse than the doubter, he just see things and objects as unreachable because he couldn’t reach them himself. So he keeps saying that you can’t do it and try to negatively affects you.

  9. Avatar

    Lawrence Berry

    Oct 3, 2015 at 12:27 am

    There is not doubt that the people you hang around the most are the people that are going to be the most influential in your life. You are right in saying that negative things will make it seem like you are tracking through mud as you are on the road to reaching your dreams. You need to surround yourself with people who are positive and will be there to help you accomplish your dreams, even if they don’t 100% believe in it. These are your true friends who want to see you happy in life. Surround yourself with people who are going where you want to go. That will make the road to success a whole lot easier.

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