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4 Behaviors You Have Total Control Over to Get Your Day Off to a Rocking Start

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Image Credit: Twenty20.com

One of the biggest issues that I hear consistently in my coaching and consultancy practice is that people feel they have no control over many (if any) aspects of their life. Guess what? They’re right! Most things in this world we don’t have control over. We don’t have control of the weather, if the plane flying over us at this moment loses its engine, and that engine squashes us, if we win the lottery, or if we get hit by a bus. But one thing we have total control over is our attitude. We can choose that at any moment, and it could be whatever we decide it to be.

Ultimately, we want it to be a positive attitude. (I mean, it’s just as time consuming to have a negative attitude as a positive attitude; it might as well be positive!) But, just because we have full control over our attitude, sometimes being positive isn’t the easiest thing to do.

In my opinion, it all starts in the morning. If we can behave positively in that precious period of time between opening our eyes and being fully cognizant; you know, before our subconscious leaves us and our conscious mind takes control, we have a gigantic head start over the rest of our day.

Here are four behaviors that you have absolute total control over to get your day off to a rocking start:

1. Get up earlier

You have a choice over when you get up. Choose to get up earlier so that your day starts off less stressed! I hear so many people say that they wake up when their children and spouse arise, and then between making breakfasts, lunches, getting people out the door on time, and the stress of personally getting ready to leave, these people hit their car at 7:30 and are white knuckling it all the way to work totally stressed.

And, if by chance there is a traffic jam or something else that holds them up, the stress builds, especially if they are late to work. Then, the first thing that happens at work makes them explode. Why not get up half an hour or maybe even an hour earlier just so you can take your time and perhaps celebrate for 10 minutes more in a hot, soapy shower, or maybe spend 30 minutes catching up on that novel that you purchased a month ago and haven’t started yet. It’s your time, make use of it.

“Before anything else, preparation is the key to success.” – Alexander Graham Bell

2. Do something for yourself

Especially, if you get up earlier, you’ll have some time for you. The key is to use that time and not feel guilty or selfish about. Sometimes that personal time is all that it takes to give us perspective and enough separation between our daily thoughts to allow for a period of mindfulness to occur. Maybe it’s reading, maybe it’s watching reruns of The Big Bang Theroy; it doesn’t matter, do it and celebrate it!

3. Smile

The first thing you should do when you get out of bed is develop the habit of smiling. Before you blow this off as an insignificant bit of psychobabble, stop doing what you’re doing and take a moment to sit upright and have your face in a neutral position (not smiling or not frowning). Now smile. Can you feel the tension on your lips as they are spreading? Can you feel the pressure on your cheeks?

Now think for a second about how you feel while you are smiling. I bet you feel a little bit happier. The physical act of smiling tends to put us in a better mood. So, smile and do it on purpose! William James, the noted 20th-century Harvard psychologist said, “We don’t smile because we are happy, we are happy because we smile.”

4. Think about what you are grateful for

Before you start your day in earnest, think about the answer to this question: What am I grateful for? Either in your calendar, or on a sheet of paper, or, better yet, in a gratitude journal, list two or three things each day that you are grateful for. You can be grateful for simple things, things you may take for granted, like walking, or being able to digest a good meal.

Perhaps your gratitude may tend to the more complex. It doesn’t matter, put yourself in a state of mindful gratitude and you will find your day is naturally better. If you are looking for a more positive attitude by jumpstarting your morning, thinking of several things that you are grateful for and documenting them is a gigantic step in that direction.

“Live as if you were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever.” – Mahatma Gandhi

There you have four behaviors that you have absolute total control over. And if you institutionalize these behaviors into the realm of habitual, you will find that your attitude becomes more positive.

I have tested these with clients and even more important with myself. I have found them each to work and be very beneficial. So, before you blow these off, give it a month to install the behavior, then a month to practice. If after two months these practices don’t work for you, well try something different, after all, it is your day!

What are some of your morning habits? Comment below!

Image courtesy of Twenty20.com

Biagio Sciacca, known to his friends as Bill, was a lifelong resident of Pittston, PA. He is the owner of Intelligent Motivation, Inc. a global consulting and training firm specializing in management and leadership training as well as psychological assessment for hiring and staff development. He is the author of several books relating to goal setting, and his third book, Provocative Leadership, is publishing soon. Now residing in Tamarindo, Costa Rica, he divides his time between his international coaching and training clients, writing his next book and wandering aimlessly on the beach. Feel free to contact Bill at bill@intelligentmotivationinc.com or schedule a call with him by going to www.intelligentmotivationinc.com and clicking on the “set up a call” tab.

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In workplaces around the world, there’s a growing gap between employers and employees and between superiors and their teams. It’s a common refrain: “People don’t leave companies, they leave bad bosses.”

While there are, of course, cases where management could do better, this isn’t just a “bad boss” problem. The relationship between leaders and employees is complex. Instead of assigning blame, we should explore practical solutions to build stronger, healthier workplaces where everyone thrives.

Why This Gap Exists

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What if, instead of focusing on blame, we focused on building trust, empathy, and communication? This is where modern leadership and human-centered management can make a difference.

Tools and Techniques to Bridge the Gap

Here are proven strategies leaders and employees can use to foster stronger relationships and create a workplace where people actually want to stay.

1. Practice Mutual Empathy

Both managers and employees need to recognize they are ultimately on the same team. Leaders have to balance people and performance, and often face intense pressure to hit targets. Employees who understand this reality are more likely to cooperate and problem-solve collaboratively.

2. Maintain Professional Boundaries

Superiors should separate personal issues from professional decision-making. Consistency, fairness, and integrity build trust, and trust is the foundation of a motivated team.

3. Follow the Golden Rule

Treat people how you would like to be treated. This simple principle encourages compassion and respect, two qualities every effective leader must demonstrate.

4. Avoid Micromanagement

Micromanaging stifles creativity and damages morale. Great leaders see themselves as partners, not just bosses, and treat their teams as collaborators working toward a shared goal.

5. Empower Employees to Grow

Empowerment means giving employees responsibility that matches their capacity, and then trusting them to deliver. Encourage them to take calculated risks, learn from mistakes, and problem-solve independently. If something goes wrong, turn it into a learning opportunity, not a reprimand.

6. Communicate in All Directions

Communication shouldn’t just be top-down. Invite feedback, create open channels for suggestions, and genuinely listen to what your people have to say. Healthy upward communication closes gaps before they become conflicts.

7. Overcome Insecurities

Many leaders secretly fear being outshone by younger, more tech-savvy employees. Instead of resisting, embrace the chance to learn from them. Humility earns respect and helps the team innovate faster.

8. Invest in Coaching and Mentorship

True leaders grow other leaders. Provide mentorship, career guidance, and stretch opportunities so employees can develop new skills. Leadership is learned through experience, but guided experience is even more powerful.

9. Eliminate Favoritism

Avoid cliques and office politics. Decisions should be based on facts and fairness, not gossip. Objective, transparent decision-making builds credibility.

10. Recognize Efforts Promptly

Recognition often matters more than rewards. Publicly appreciate employees’ contributions and do so consistently and fairly. A timely “thank you” can be more motivating than a quarterly bonus.

11. Conduct Thoughtful Exit Interviews

When employees leave, treat it as an opportunity to learn. Keep interviews confidential and use the insights to improve management practices and culture.

12. Provide Leadership Development

Train managers to lead, not just supervise. Leadership development programs help shift mindsets from “command and control” to “coach and empower.” This transformation has a direct impact on morale and retention.

13. Adopt Soft Leadership Principles

Today’s workforce, largely millennials and Gen Z, value collaboration over hierarchy. Soft leadership focuses on partnership, mutual respect, and shared purpose, rather than rigid top-down control.

The Bigger Picture: HR’s Role

Mercer’s global research highlights five key priorities for organizations:

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  • Embrace flexible work models

  • Design compelling career paths

  • Simplify HR processes

  • Redefine the value HR brings

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Treat Employees Like Associates, Not Just Staff

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Organizational success starts with people, always. Build the relationship with your team first, and the results will follow.

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