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The 7 Things that Are Preventing You from Enjoying Life to the Fullest

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If you’d like to learn how to live each moment to the fullest and succeed in all aspects of your life so you can be happy, sign up for the free 90-Day Master Class hosted by the founder of Addicted2Success.com, Joel Brown.


To some people, life is unfair. To some, life is good. And to others, life is great. It all depends on your perspective and how much responsibility you take for your personal development and income.

But regardless of how we see life, we all want the same thing – to live each moment to the fullest. It doesn’t matter if you are the richest person alive or the poorest. It doesn’t matter whether you’re the happiest person on earth or the saddest, we all want to enjoy life to the fullest.

The problem is – there are some things hindering us from this goal that our mind is hiding from us. It might be difficult to discover these things on your own, but if you don’t just want to exit, but also live; if you don’t just want to survive, but also thrive, you must get rid of these things.

Today we will examine the 7 things that are preventing you from living each moment to the fullest and how to break free from them:

1. Trying to Please Everyone

There are many reasons this is futile. The dominant one is that you’ll never be happy being someone else because you’ll put yourself under immense pressure trying to pull it off. And when it’s all been said and done, you still won’t be able to please everybody because different people want different things for you. The question is – what do you want for yourself?

The second reason is even worse for life-changing decisions like career, business, or marriage. The people you’re trying to please won’t suffer the consequences with you daily. They won’t be the ones going about with the burden of that poor decision. In fact, you might end up resenting them for the poor decisions you made to please them.

If you always try to please everyone, you will never, ever enjoy life to the fullest.

2. Waiting for Permission

If you think someone won’t give you their blessing to do what is really important to you, don’t go to them to ask for permission. Just do it anyway and apologize later if need be. If it is so important to you, then do it. You have to be bold enough to stand up for yourself.

“Do what makes YOU happy. Focus on what brings YOU joy. Appreciate and do more things that make YOU smile. Live your life for yourself. You matter! You count! You’re deserving of true happiness! This is YOUR life. Live it to the fullest! Live life with no regrets.” – Stephanie Lahart

3. Waiting for the Right Time

The problem with waiting for the right time is – it never comes. Weeks will pass, then months, and even years, and you will always find an excuse to procrastinate. Then you will regret not starting now.

The right time is now; when you have the motivation. Happiness isn’t something you can find, you have to create it. And if you do that, years will pass by and you would be happy that you started now.

Sure it might not go as expected, but as Mark Twain Said, “Twenty years from now, you will be disappointed more by the things you didn’t do than by the things you do.”

4. Comparing Yourself to Others

The danger of comparing yourself to others is that you might think you’re doing so well that you’ll relax too much. Or you might find out that the people you’re comparing yourself to are miles ahead of you and you might get discouraged. 

Sure, you should be competing with someone; but that person isn’t your someone else rather than the person you were yesterday. As long as you do better today than you did yesterday, and you do that every day, you are already successful. 

“A flower does not think of competing to the flower next to it, it just blooms.” – Zen Shin

5. Taking Self-Education Lightly

A wise man, Jim Rohn, once said, “formal education will make you a living. Self-education will make you a fortune.” and there’s a lot of truth in that.

They don’t teach you the concept of lifestyle design for absolute freedom in school. You can only learn that by reading books (or listening to audiobooks) like the 4-hour workweek by Tim Ferriss.

In school, they don’t teach you the life-changing concept of goal setting. But you can learn from books like Goals! By Brian Tracy; that shows you how to achieve everything you want faster than you ever thought possible. Let’s say you wanted to start a YouTube channel that motivates others: you’d need to be educating yourself on your audience, learning how to design thumbnails, and figuring out the ins and outs of video production. Although this would take time, the benefits could massively outweigh the waiting game.

Your parents might not teach you how to achieve financial freedom (maybe they aren’t financially independent themselves); but you can learn something like that in Rich Dad, Poor Dad by Robert Kiyosaki.

The point is, it doesn’t matter whether you are a doctor who also wants to do better; a businessman who wants to get ahead faster; or a person who just wants to live happier, there are blogs, books, podcasts, and other things out there that can save you years of hard work and learning the hard way.

As the popular saying goes, knowledge is power.

6. Being Afraid of Failure

Many people are afraid of failure because they think it’s a bad thing. But failure gives you experience, which they say, is the best teacher. It teaches you everything you need to succeed. Plus, you can use Tim Ferriss’ fear setting to master it. 

You can also avoid failure easily if you love self-education – aka learning from history. And finally, you can overcome it if you are willing to live with the possibility of failure and you plan to learn from it to become smarter.

7. Missing out on the Benefits of Meditation

Some people think they don’t have time for meditation. But given the fact that it literally increases focus and attention, reduces stress, preserves the aging brain, physically changes the brain structure for the better, reduces anxiety and depression, helps overcome addictions, and has a bunch of other benefits; I think it is safe to say that you don’t have the time not to meditate.

And Don’t Forget to do This

Define what success means to you. To some people, it means becoming rich and living the billionaire lifestyle. Some people just want to climb to the top of the corporate ladder, have a wonderful family, and live happily ever after. Some people would love to join or create their own NGO to achieve a higher purpose.

But all that doesn’t matter. All that matters is that you know exactly what it is you want to do with your life. You need to define success in your own terms. What does success mean to you? Use your answer to devise a plan to make it happen.

It will make your life a lot easier and your decision making swift every time. So the next time you have a big decision to make, you can ask yourself, does it take me closer to my goal? Or farther from it?

What activity makes you enjoy your life to the fullest? Share your thoughts with us below!

Abraham O. Adeniyi is the founder of Give Me That!, a self-education platform that focuses on ambitious people who want to succeed faster, get richer, or achieve absolute life mastery. You can sign up for his free e-course Redefine Success. Or Get his 10-part guide Personal Transformation Mastery.

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The Imbalanced Problem with Work/Life Balance

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5 Indicators of Unresolved Attachment Trauma

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Emotional Attachment Trauma

Trauma caused during specific stages of a child’s development, known as attachment trauma, can have lasting effects on a person’s sense of safety, security, predictability, and trust. This type of trauma is often the result of abuse, neglect, or inconsistent care from a primary caregiver.

Individuals who have not fully processed attachment trauma may display similar patterns of behavior and physical or psychological symptoms that negatively impact their adult lives, including the choices they make in relationships and business.

Unfortunately, many people may not even be aware that they are struggling with trauma. Research estimates that 6% of the population will experience PTSD in their lifetime, with a majority of males and females having experienced significant trauma.

Unresolved attachment trauma can significantly impair the overall quality of a person’s life, including their ability to form healthy relationships and make positive choices for themselves. One well-known effect of unhealed attachment trauma is the compulsion to repeat past wounds by unconsciously selecting romantic partners who trigger their developmental trauma.

However, there are other less recognized but equally detrimental signs of unprocessed developmental trauma.

 

Five possible indications of unresolved attachment trauma are:

 

1.  Unconscious Sabotage

Self-sabotage is a common pattern among individuals with unprocessed attachment trauma. This cycle often begins with hurting others, which is then followed by hurting oneself. It is also common for those with attachment trauma to have heightened emotional sensitivity, which can trigger this cycle.

This pattern can manifest in lashing out, shutting down, or impulsive behavior that leads to feelings of guilt, shame, and self-loathing.

Many people with attachment trauma are not aware of their wounds and operate on survival mode, unconsciously testing or challenging the emotional investment of those around them, and pushing them away out of self-preservation and fear of abandonment.

This can lead to a pattern of making poor choices for themselves based on impulsivity.

 

2. Persistent Pain

 
Chronic pain is a common symptom that can stem from early trauma. Studies have shown a connection between physical conditions such as fibromyalgia, headaches, gastrointestinal issues, insomnia, muscle aches, back pain, chest pain, and chronic fatigue with the aftermath of chronic developmental trauma, particularly physical abuse.
 
Research has found that individuals with insecure attachment styles, such as anxious, avoidant, or disorganized, have a higher incidence of somatic symptoms and a history of physical and emotional abuse in childhood compared to those with a secure attachment style.
 
 

3. Behaviors That Block Out Trauma

 
Trauma blocking practises are used to avoid the pain and memories connected with traumatic events.
 
Emotional numbing, avoidance, and escape via briefly pleasurable activities that distract from terrible memories or suffering are common examples. Unfortunately, this escape habit stops people from successfully processing and recovering from their trauma.
 
Furthermore, when the pain resurfaces, more and more diversions are necessary to continue ignoring it. This can be seen in compulsive behaviours such as drug or alcohol addiction, emotional eating, numbing oneself through relationships, workaholism, excessive or dangerous exercise routines, compulsive internet or technology use, or any other compulsive behaviour used to distract yoursef from intrusive thoughts and emotions.
 
These actions have the potential to prolong a cycle of avoidance and repression, preventing persons from healing and progressing.
 

4. A strong need for control

 
It’s understandable that some people may struggle with control issues in their adult lives, especially if they felt helpless or vulnerable during their childhood.
 
This can happen if someone had an overbearing caregiver who didn’t let them make their own choices, expected too much from them, or didn’t take care of them properly. As adults, they might try to control everything in their life to feel more in control and less anxious or scared. This might be because they didn’t feel like they had control over their life when they were a child.
 
It’s important to remember that everyone’s experiences are different and it’s okay to seek help if you’re struggling with control issues.
 
 

5. Psychological Symptoms That Are Not Explained

 
Individuals with a history of developmental trauma may experience a range of psychological symptoms, including obsessive-compulsive behavior, intense mood swings, irritability, anger, depression, emotional numbing, or severe anxiety.
 
These symptoms can vary in intensity and may occur intermittently throughout the day. People with this type of trauma may attempt to “distract” themselves from these symptoms by denying or rationalizing them, or may resort to substance abuse or behavioral addictions as coping mechanisms. This can be a maladaptive way of trying to numb their symptoms.
 
 

What to do next if you’re suffering from emotional attachment trauma?

 
Everyone’s experience of healing from trauma is unique. It’s important to be aware of whether you have experienced childhood developmental trauma and how it may be affecting your relationships as an adult. Sometimes, the effects of trauma can be overwhelming and we may try to push them away or avoid them.
 
If you notice that you’re engaging in these behaviors, it’s important to seek help from a trauma therapist who can support you on your healing journey. Remember, you’re not alone and it’s never too late to start healing.
 

There are several ways that people can work to overcome emotional attachment trauma:

  1. Therapy: One of the most effective ways to overcome emotional attachment trauma is through therapy. A therapist can help you process your experiences, understand the impact of your trauma on your life, and develop coping strategies to manage symptoms.
  2. Support groups: Joining a support group of people who have had similar experiences can be a great way to find validation, empathy, and a sense of community.
  3. Mindfulness practices: Mindfulness practices such as meditation, pilates, prayer time with God or journaling can help you become more aware of your thoughts, emotions, and physical sensations, and develop a sense of spiritual connection and self-regulation.
  4. Trauma-focused cognitive-behavioral therapy (TF-CBT): This is a type of therapy that is specifically designed to help individuals process and recover from traumatic events.
  5. Building a safety net: Building a support system of people you trust, who are there for you when you need them, can help you feel more secure and safe in your life.

It’s important to remember that healing from emotional attachment trauma is a process and it may take time. It’s also important to find a therapist who is experienced in treating trauma, who you feel comfortable talking with, and who can help you develop a personalized treatment plan.

 
 
If you desire to work with me on healing your wounds and unlocking the aspects of you that were never realized so you can achieve more success in your life then head over to awebliss.com and join my weekly LIVE online mentorship calls.
 
 
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