Life

Does Life Truly Begin at 40? 6 Things I Realized at Age 39

Published

8 years ago

May 17, 2017

They say life begins at forty, the age we aspire to start living the good life. I am sure many people create bucket lists of things to accomplish before 40 – the milestone age. Before my fortieth birthday I researched the recommended things I should do before I turn forty and here are some of the things I discovered on the list:

Swim with sharks
Get married
Dance naked in the rain
Learn to drive
Read the whole bible
Chat up a stranger in a bar
See your favorite band live
Put the bin out in one’s undies
Travel around the world

There are a few things on the ‘before you turn 40’ bucket list you probably have done, which became some of your best life experiences.

Bucket lists are well and good, and I love the fun ones the most. But what happens if life does not begin at forty? When plans fall apart and you are left in limbo trying to restart your life again, what do you do? Well, you create a new story.

When redundancy struck at 39, here are some of the life lessons I learnt when I emerged from my pity party:

1. Life Is Happening Now

One of the greatest lessons I learnt during that time of reflection was this famous quote credited to Allen Saunders “life happens when you are busy making other plans.” I learnt the hard way that you cannot wait for your life to be perfect before you start living your dreams. Life is happening now, and you should embrace all that life has to offer you in the present – not wait for the future before you start to ‘live’.

2. Explore Your Talent

Whether you are 20, 30 or 55, life is happening right now, so putting off what you can with your talent until you reach your milestone age may not serve you well. I learnt many lessons during that time of unemployment and the greatest one was to never limit my talent to a job description or what people say you can or can’t do. There are limitless opportunities waiting for you and your talent, if you can take the bold step to venture out of your comfort zone.

“Don’t put your life on hold so that you can dwell on the unfairness of past hurts.” – Nick Vujicic

3. You Have A Choice

One of the most common excuses we hear when people fall into trouble is “I did not have a choice.” There is always a choice, and there is always another way. The question is not whether we have a choice but if we are willing to explore the options presented to us at the time. If we have not trained our minds to distinguish between positive and negative information, most likely the wrong choice will be embraced as emotions get the better of us.

There are so many factors that contribute to the choices we make, finances being one of the key contributors. When I decided that money was a tool and not my end goal, my eyes were opened to many more opportunities in life.

4. Step Out Of Your Comfort Zone

It is so easy to confine our abilities to our comfort zone especially if we have been in the same employment or business for many years. I understand that starting a business may not be for everyone, but packaging the components of our passion is the prerequisite for living a fulfilled life. How would you feel if you were able to merge what you love with your work and make it your lifestyle? Just think of how great and fulfilling that would be. When you decide to explore that talent within you, you will be amazed at what you can accomplish with what you have.

5. Do What You Are Passionate About

This is a quote I created for myself, “your genius zone is the place of your passion, purpose and profit.” Are you doing what you are passionate about or have you resigned yourself to a regular way of life? After my epiphany at 39, I realised that if I wanted to live a fulfilled life I have to package my passion and find the best way to get paid for it. This thought could make the difference in your life to save you from a life of drudgery and give birth to the solutions that the world needs.

6. Opportunities Are Waiting

Stephen C Hogan advised “most people miss great opportunities because of the misperception of time. Don’t wait! The time will never be just right.” We think we have all the time in the world to do the things we would love to do, so we put them off until the perfect time. Opportunities are waiting right now, and if you package your passion, you will be able to embrace them sooner rather than later.

You may think you do not have the time or resources to embrace these new opportunities – not true. The problem is a lack of priorities – not focusing on the things we want the most in life and making them part of our daily goals and tasks.

“Decide what you want, and then act as if it were impossible to fail.” – Brian Tracy

Now that I have crossed the great threshold of forty, my perception on life begins at forty has changed. I realize there is no perfect age to accomplish any goal. If I had the chance to advise my younger self, I would tell her to discover and explore the potency of her passion on a daily basis.

I will encourage her to maximise every opportunity that comes her way. I will also teach her how to be aware of the dominant components of her passion, so she matches them to the right opportunities when they appear. Life is right now, right here – make the most of it.

What are you doing to live a more fulfilled life? Leave your thoughts below!

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Temi Koleowo

Temi Koleowo is passionate about helping individuals, and businesses alike discover their superpowers (aka their inner strengths and uniqueness) and turn them into viable products and services. their passion and talent to live their best lives every day by doing what they love.

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Life

How Learning the Skill of Hope Can Change Everything

Hope isn’t wishful thinking. It’s a state of being and a skill that has profound evidence of helping people achieve success in life

Published

2 weeks ago

Jan 6, 2025

Daniel Bell

Image Credit: Midjourney

Hope isn’t wishful thinking. It’s a state of being and a skill that has profound evidence of helping people achieve success in life.

Wishful thinking, on the other hand, is like having dreams in the sky without a ladder to climb, having a destination without a map, or trying to operate a jet-engine airplane without instructions. It sounds nice but is impossible to realize. You don’t have what you need to make it happen!

What Real Hope Is

Real hope is actionable, practical, and realistic. Better yet, it’s feasible and can be learned.

One popular approach is Hope Theory. This concept is used by colleges to study how hope impacts students’ academic performance. Researchers found that students with high levels of hope achieve better grades and are more likely to graduate compared to those with less hope.

Hope can be broken down into two components:

Pathways – The “how to” of hope. This is where people think of and establish plans for achieving their goals.
Agency – The “I can” of hope. This is the belief that the person can accomplish their goals.

Does Hope Really Work?

According to Webster’s Dictionary, hope as a noun is defined as: “desire accompanied by expectation of or belief in fulfillment.”

As humans, we are wired to crave fulfillment. We have the ability to envision it and, through hope, make it a reality.

My Experience with Hope

For 13 years, I was a hopeless human. During my time working at a luxury hotel as a front desk agent earning $11.42 per hour, I felt the sting of hopelessness the most.

The regret of feeling my time was being stolen from me lingered every time I clocked in. Eventually, I decided to do something about it.

I gave myself permission to hope for something better. I began establishing pathways to success and regained agency by learning from self-help books and seeking mentorship.

Because I took action toward something I desired, I now feel more hope and joy than I ever felt hopelessness. Hope changed me.

Hope Actually Improves Your Life

Wishful thinking doesn’t work, and false hope is equally ineffective. Real hope, however, is directly tied to success in all areas of life.

Studies show that hopeful people tend to:

Demonstrate better problem-solving skills
Cultivate healthier relationships
Maintain stronger motivation to achieve goals
Exhibit better work ethic
Have a positive outlook on life

These benefits can impact work life, family life, habit-building, mental health, physical health, and spiritual practice. Imagine how much better your life could be by applying real hope to all these areas.

How to Develop the Skill to Hope

As acclaimed French writer Jean Giono wrote in The Man Who Planted Trees:
“There are also times in life when a person has to rush off in pursuit of hopefulness.”

If you are at one of those times, here are ways to develop the skill to hope:

1. Dream Again

To cultivate hope, you need to believe in its possibility. Start by:

Reflecting on what you’re passionate about, your values, and what you want to achieve.
Writing your dreams down, sharing them with someone encouraging, or saying them out loud.
Creating a vision board to make your dreams feel more tangible.

Dreams are the foundation of hope—they give you something meaningful to aspire toward.

2. Create an Environment of Hope

Set Goals: Write down your goals and create a plan to achieve them.
Visualize Success: Use inspirational quotes, photos, or tools like dumbbells or canvases to remind yourself of your goals.
Build a Resource Library: Collect books, eBooks, or audiobooks about hope and success to inspire you.

An environment that fosters hope will keep you motivated, resilient, and focused.

3. Face the Challenges

Don’t avoid challenges—overcoming them builds confidence. Participating in challenging activities, like strategic games, can enhance your problem-solving skills and reinforce hope.

4. Commit to Wisdom

Seek wisdom from those who have achieved what you aspire to. Whether through books, blogs, or social media platforms, learn from their journeys. Wisdom provides the foundation for real, actionable hope.

5. Take Note of Small Wins

Reflecting on past victories can fuel your hope for the future. Ask yourself:

What challenges have I already overcome?
How did I feel when I succeeded?

By remembering those feelings of happiness, relief, or satisfaction, your brain will naturally adopt a more hopeful mindset.

Conclusion

Hope is more than wishful thinking—it’s a powerful skill that can transform your life. By dreaming again, creating a hopeful environment, facing challenges, seeking wisdom, and celebrating small wins, you can develop the real hope necessary for success in all aspects of life.

Let hope guide you toward a brighter, more fulfilling future.

Life

The 5 Stages of a Quarter-Life Crisis & What You Can Do

A quarter-life crisis isn’t a sign you’ve lost your way; it’s a sign you’re fighting for a life that’s truly yours.

Published

3 weeks ago

Dec 27, 2024

CT Dool

Image Credit: Midjourney

The quarter-life crisis is a well-defined set of stages—Trapped, Checking Out, Separation, Exploration, Rebuilding—one goes through in breaking free from feelings of meaninglessness, lack of fulfillment, and misalignment with purpose. I detail the stages and interweave my story below. (more…)

Life

Here’s The Thing About Learning, Unlearning, and Relearning

Stop hoarding and start sharing your knowledge and wealth for the benefit of humankind

Published

2 months ago

Nov 21, 2024

M.S. Rao

Image Credit: Midjourney

Few people have the habit of hoarding their wealth without spending. However, it limits their motivation as they tend to get into their comfort zones. When people start spending money, then there will be depletion in their coffers. (more…)