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Does Life Truly Begin at 40? 6 Things I Realized at Age 39

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Does life begin at 40

They say life begins at forty, the age we aspire to start living the good life.  I am sure many people create bucket lists of things to accomplish before 40 – the milestone age.  Before my fortieth birthday I researched the recommended things I should do before I turn forty and here are some of the things I discovered on the list:

  • Swim with sharks
  • Get married
  • Dance naked in the rain
  • Learn to drive
  • Read the whole bible
  • Chat up a stranger in a bar
  • See your favorite band live
  • Put the bin out in one’s undies
  • Travel around the world

There are a few things on the ‘before you turn 40’ bucket list you probably have done, which became some of your best life experiences.

Bucket lists are well and good, and I love the fun ones the most. But what happens if life does not begin at forty?  When plans fall apart and you are left in limbo trying to restart your life again, what do you do?  Well, you create a new story.

When redundancy struck at 39, here are some of the life lessons I learnt when I emerged from my pity party:

1. Life Is Happening Now

One of the greatest lessons I learnt during that time of reflection was this famous quote credited to Allen Saunders “life happens when you are busy making other plans.”  I learnt the hard way that you cannot wait for your life to be perfect before you start living your dreams.  Life is happening now, and you should embrace all that life has to offer you in the present – not wait for the future before you start to ‘live’.  

2. Explore Your Talent

Whether you are 20, 30 or 55, life is happening right now, so putting off what you can with your talent until you reach your milestone age may not serve you well. I learnt many lessons during that time of unemployment and the greatest one was to never limit my talent to a job description or what people say you can or can’t do. There are limitless opportunities waiting for you and your talent, if you can take the bold step to venture out of your comfort zone.

“Don’t put your life on hold so that you can dwell on the unfairness of past hurts.” – Nick Vujicic

3. You Have A Choice

One of the most common excuses we hear when people fall into trouble is “I did not have a choice.”  There is always a choice, and there is always another way. The question is not whether we have a choice but if we are willing to explore the options presented to us at the time.  If we have not trained our minds to distinguish between positive and negative information, most likely the wrong choice will be embraced as emotions get the better of us.  

There are so many factors that contribute to the choices we make, finances being one of the key contributors. When I decided that money was a tool and not my end goal, my eyes were opened to many more opportunities in life.

4. Step Out Of Your Comfort Zone

It is so easy to confine our abilities to our comfort zone especially if we have been in the same employment or business for many years.  I understand that starting a business may not be for everyone, but packaging the components of our passion is the prerequisite for living a fulfilled life. How would you feel if you were able to merge what you love with your work and make it your lifestyle? Just think of how great and fulfilling that would be. When you decide to explore that talent within you, you will be amazed at what you can accomplish with what you have.

5. Do What You Are Passionate About

This is a quote I created for myself, “your genius zone is the place of your passion, purpose and profit.” Are you doing what you are passionate about or have you resigned yourself to a regular way of life?  After my epiphany at 39, I realised that if I wanted to live a fulfilled life I have to package my passion and find the best way to get paid for it. This thought could make the difference in your life to save you from a life of drudgery and give birth to the solutions that the world needs.    

6. Opportunities Are Waiting

Stephen C Hogan advised “most people miss great opportunities because of the misperception of time. Don’t wait! The time will never be just right.”  We think we have all the time in the world to do the things we would love to do, so we put them off until the perfect time.  Opportunities are waiting right now, and if you package your passion, you will be able to embrace them sooner rather than later.

You may think you do not have the time or resources to embrace these new opportunities – not true.  The problem is a lack of priorities – not focusing on the things we want the most in life and making them part of our daily goals and tasks.

“Decide what you want, and then act as if it were impossible to fail.” – Brian Tracy

Now that I have crossed the great threshold of forty, my perception on life begins at forty has changed.  I realize there is no perfect age to accomplish any goal. If I had the chance to advise my younger self, I would tell her to discover and explore the potency of her passion on a daily basis.

I will encourage her to maximise every opportunity that comes her way.  I will also teach her how to be aware of the dominant components of her passion, so she matches them to the right opportunities when they appear. Life is right now, right here – make the most of it.  

What are you doing to live a more fulfilled life? Leave your thoughts below!

Temi Koleowo is passionate about helping individuals, and businesses alike discover their superpowers (aka their inner strengths and uniqueness) and turn them into viable products and services. their passion and talent to live their best lives every day by doing what they love.

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Life

9 Harsh Truths Every Young Man Must Face to Succeed in the Modern World

Before chasing success, every young man needs to face these 9 brutal realities shaping masculinity in the modern world.

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harsh truths for young men
Image Credit: Midjourney

Many young men today quietly battle depression, loneliness, and a sense of confusion about who they’re meant to be.

Some blame the lack of deep friendships or romantic relationships. Others feel lost in a digital world that often labels traditional masculinity as “toxic.”

But the truth is this: becoming a man in the modern age takes more than just surviving. It takes resilience, direction, and a willingness to grow even when no one’s watching.

Success doesn’t arrive by accident or luck. It’s built on discipline, sacrifice, and consistency.

Here are 9 harsh truths every young man should know if he wants to thrive, not just survive, in the digital age.

1. Never Use Your Illness as an Excuse

As Dr. Jordan B. Peterson often says, successful people don’t complain; they act.

Your illness, hardship, or struggle shouldn’t define your limits; it should define your motivation. Rest when you must, but always get back up and keep building your dreams. Motivation doesn’t appear magically. It comes after you take action.

Here are five key lessons I’ve learned from Dr. Peterson:

  • Learn to write clearly; clarity of thought makes you dangerous.

  • Read quality literature in your free time.

  • Nurture a strong relationship with your family.

  • Share your ideas publicly; your voice matters.

  • Become a “monster”, powerful, but disciplined enough to control it.

The best leaders and thinkers are grounded. They welcome criticism, adapt quickly, and keep moving forward no matter what.

2. You Can’t Please Everyone And That’s Okay

You don’t need a crowd of people to feel fulfilled. You need a few friends who genuinely accept you for who you are.

If your circle doesn’t bring out your best, it’s okay to walk away. Solitude can be a powerful teacher. It gives you space to understand what you truly want from life. Remember, successful men aren’t people-pleasers; they’re purpose-driven.

3. You Can Control the Process, Not the Outcome

Especially in creative work, writing, business, or content creation, you control effort, not results.

You might publish two articles a day, but you can’t dictate which one will go viral. Focus on mastery, not metrics. Many great writers toiled for years in obscurity before anyone noticed them. Rejection, criticism, and indifference are all part of the path.

The best creators focus on storytelling, not applause.

4. Rejection Is Never Personal

Rejection doesn’t mean you’re unworthy. It simply means your offer, idea, or timing didn’t align.

Every successful person has faced rejection repeatedly. What separates them is persistence and perspective. They see rejection as feedback, not failure. The faster you learn that truth, the faster you’ll grow.

5. Women Value Comfort and Security

Understanding women requires maturity and empathy.

Through books, lectures, and personal growth, I’ve learned that most women desire a man who is grounded, intelligent, confident, emotionally stable, and consistent. Some want humor, others intellect, but nearly all want to feel safe and supported.

Instead of chasing attention, work on self-improvement. Build competence and confidence, and the rest will follow naturally.

6. There’s No Such Thing as Failure, Only Lessons

A powerful lesson from Neuro-Linguistic Programming: failure only exists when you stop trying.

Every mistake brings data. Every setback builds wisdom. The most successful men aren’t fearless. They’ve simply learned to act despite fear.

Be proud of your scars. They’re proof you were brave enough to try.

7. Public Speaking Is an Art Form

Public speaking is one of the most valuable and underrated skills a man can master.

It’s not about perfection; it’s about connection. The best speakers tell stories, inspire confidence, and make people feel seen. They research deeply, speak honestly, and practice relentlessly.

If you can speak well, you can lead, sell, teach, and inspire. Start small, practice at work, in class, or even in front of a mirror, and watch your confidence skyrocket.

8. Teaching Is Leadership in Disguise

Great teachers are not just knowledgeable. They’re brave, compassionate, and disciplined.

Teaching forces you to articulate what you know, and in doing so, you master it at a deeper level. Whether you’re mentoring a peer, leading a team, or sharing insights online, teaching refines your purpose.

Lifelong learners become lifelong leaders.

9. Study Human Nature to Achieve Your Dreams

One of the toughest lessons to accept: most people are self-interested.

That’s not cynicism, it’s human nature. Understanding this helps you navigate relationships, business, and communication more effectively.

Everyone has a darker side, but successful people learn to channel theirs productively into discipline, creativity, and drive.

Psychology isn’t just theory; it’s a toolkit. Learn how people think, act, and decide, and you’ll know how to lead them, influence them, and even understand yourself better.

Final Thoughts

The digital age offers endless opportunities, but only to those who are willing to take responsibility, confront discomfort, and keep improving.

Becoming a man today means embracing the hard truths most avoid.

Because at the end of the day, success isn’t about luck. It’s about who you become when life tests you the most.

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Change Your Mindset

The Four Types of Happiness: Which One Are You Living In?

Most people chase success only to find emptiness, this model reveals why true happiness lies somewhere else.

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In a world driven by rapid technological growth and constant competition, many people unknowingly trade joy for achievement. (more…)

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Change Your Mindset

The Secret Daily Routines Behind History’s Most Brilliant Thinkers

Uncover the daily rituals and hidden habits that powered history’s most brilliant minds to success.

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Why Daily Rituals Matter

Every great achiever has one thing in common: discipline. Behind the novels, inventions, discoveries, and masterpieces are small, consistent habits repeated daily. (more…)

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Finances

From Debt to Financial Independence: A Practical Roadmap Anyone Can Follow

It’s about having control over your money and not letting money control you.

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Image Credit: Midjourney

The 21st century has brought incredible opportunities but also new challenges. Rapid technological change, global uncertainty, and shifting lifestyles have made many people think more deeply about financial freedom. (more…)

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