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8 Important Reasons Why You Should Be More Independent

Joel Brown (Founder of Addicted2Success.com)

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Be Independent

We naturally become more independent as we progress through life. We move away from our parents, and any bonds that once sustained us from our childhood are slowly diminished as we move into “The Real World“. Some people however form a set of new bonds as they move away from home and they never actually grow to be truly independent. There are many reasons why we should be more independent. Independence here refers to all aspects of your life including financial, career, emotional, personal faith and beliefs.

So here are the 8 important reasons why you should be more independent.

 

 

8 Reasons Why You Should Be More Independent

 

1 –  Personal independence boosts your confidence

Independent people naturally tend to be a little more confident on handling issues affecting their lives. This is mainly because they are more prepared to take actions and do things without having to wait for support or permission from someone else. Being independent therefore means that you will be more likely to try out new things that you want, rather than what or how you are expected to. This also means that you will have more experience than a less independent individual. This will in time build up more confidence in you with the knowledge that you can do things on your own.

For entrepreneurs, this confidence opens your mind to taking bigger risks and unbeaten paths that eventually returns bigger rewards.

 

2 – Less reliance on others

Less independent individuals tend to rely so much on others. This may be because they do not want to have to make choices for themselves or they feel too shy to go through challenges in their life without somebody by their side. This character makes you appear overly needy. Being a little more independent will be much appreciated by people and they will be willing to come to you for help. Being needed or relied upon is what many crave for; this will add some value on you and make you feel important.

 

3 – Emotional independence reduces stress and promotes happiness

Being emotionally dependent means that you can make the most of your personal decisions and go through challenging life situations without necessarily dragging other people into it. More emotional independence can also mean less suffering and disappointment, since you do not depend on others to meet you emotional needs. It is however good to understand that social support is necessary, but you can still get it without necessarily being emotionally dependent.

 

4 – Financial independence means freedom and a sense of accomplishment

When it comes to personal independence, there is no satisfaction comparable to the ability to pay your own bills. Being able to pay your way through life reduces dependence on your parents, friends, spouse or whichever person you used to lean on. Financial independence means that you control your income and expenditure and you are not answerable to anybody.

The more that you learn to become financially independent, the less stress you may have in your life as you are more in control of your financial outcome.

 

Be Your Own Hero - Be More Independent

 

5 – Better decision making

Being independent makes decision making an easy task; this is because you have proven to yourself that you are the only person that will be really affected by the decisions you make. On the other hand, being dependent on other people for emotional or financial support makes it difficult to make clear and appropriate decisions; this is because you will always have to stop to think about how the other person will be affected, and how they will react to your decisions. Whereas it is a good idea to consider other people while making decisions, being scared to make choices in fear of upsetting others can greatly hold you back.

 

6 – Personal improvement and creativity

The idea of setting independence as a goal can greatly boost multiple aspects of your life. Emotional independence for example improves your personal relations with friends, family, work mates and other people you interact with. You become more in control of your emotions such as anger, over-excitement, anxiety, mood swings and so on. Having a free and independent mind gives you freedom to explore your skills and talents and will ultimately bring out the best in you.

 

7 – Broader horizons

To be more independent means being prepared and free to meet new people and try new things. This in turn means that you will develop a broader sense of the world and be open to people and new opportunities; which leads to more knowledge and understanding of the world. It is in these deeper horizons that lies opportunities for success and adventure. Less independent individuals are less likely to have such opportunities. This is in fact is what sets successful entrepreneurs apart from the rest.

 

8 – Self-value and self-esteem

Independence can help increase your self-value and self-esteem, more so if becoming independent is one of your goals. The achievement of financial, emotional, social, career and personal independence gives you a sense of accomplishment that eventually changes how you rate yourself and how others view you.

The increased self-worth that comes with this independence is a great booster to your self-esteem and personal success.

 

Below is an amazing quote about being independent by Friedrich Nietzsche. I hope you enjoy his quote as much as I did.

“It is the business of the very few to be independent; it is a privilege of the strong. And whoever attempts it, even with the best right, but without being OBLIGED to do so, proves that he is probably not only strong, but also daring beyond measure. He enters into a labyrinth, he multiplies a thousandfold the dangers which life in itself already brings with it; not the least of which is that no one can see how and where he loses his way, becomes isolated, and is torn piecemeal by some minotaur of conscience. Supposing such a one comes to grief, it is so far from the comprehension of men that they neither feel it, nor sympathize with it. And he cannot any longer go back! He cannot even go back again to the sympathy of men!”

 

 

I am the the Founder of Addicted2Success.com and I am so grateful you're here to be part of this awesome community. I love connecting with people who have a passion for Entrepreneurship, Self Development & Achieving Success. I started this website with the intention of educating and inspiring likeminded people to always strive for success no matter what their circumstances.I'm proud to say through my podcast and through this website we have impacted over 200 million lives in the last 10 years.

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12 Comments

12 Comments

  1. naazirah

    Aug 1, 2018 at 2:17 pm

    such an impactful article… love it

  2. swathi

    Dec 19, 2015 at 10:24 am

    Nice article!

  3. zoya

    Apr 12, 2014 at 6:28 am

    Very very true, I like it

  4. Jan

    Jan 2, 2014 at 5:19 pm

    Definitely a save…I can respect this opinion, because I am teaching classes on same sort of ideas…If you take don’t take care of yourself, you can help others!

  5. TJ

    Dec 31, 2013 at 7:00 pm

    Cool post on independence. Independence is definitely something we all should strive for. Whether it be financially, emotionally, it’s good to be in full control!

  6. mzuphangalele

    Oct 23, 2013 at 2:07 pm

    Hi there, I’m from South Africa, this post has dearly helped to pull through as iv recently started being independent. Thank you

  7. Lindi Cynthia Khan

    Oct 15, 2013 at 9:03 am

    good advice. its now my time to be independent.

  8. Nick

    Oct 1, 2013 at 1:26 am

    I honestly love and strongly agree with everything says in this written article. I am from Russia and I was adapted by american parents when I turned 16 years old. By that time I learned to be on my own, but moving to USA showed me how a lot of American kids are dependent even out the high school…

  9. James@youdolife

    Sep 29, 2013 at 4:24 pm

    Point 2 was very interesting … remember Dale Carnegie’s advice about listening to people and they will think you are the most interesting person because you show interest in them?! Well, I think we can apply the same principle here: asking for help will make people like you because, as you alluded to, people crave significance. If we don’t like asking for help and even don’t let people help us, we may risk coming across as arrogant or cold. I suppose the conclusion is that we need a balance between being someone who can see solutions independently and someone who happily accepts help and input from others! I’m unhappy with a current aspect of my personality/behaviour in that I *sometimes* show annoyance if people try to help me or bother me when I’m trying to complete a task or locate something. *sometimes = when I haven’t had enough sleep! Advice – get enough rest and do everything you can to improve your mood!

  10. vedhagiri

    Jun 18, 2013 at 3:21 pm

    Like it….

  11. Tommy Nguyen

    Jun 17, 2013 at 9:26 pm

    I like this post joe!

  12. Nikolaos B. (@NikoBogio)

    Jun 17, 2013 at 12:59 pm

    another great and inspiring piece of writing there… nice!

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How many times did you wake up feeling like you could conquer the world? You set ambitious goals for the day, you put on your best attire and walked out the door with a big smile on your face but eventually, life took over. Traffic, emails, work, family, and everything else you have around slowly but steadily started to drain your energy and made you feel exhausted.

You run out of battery, and the only solution that seemed viable was to rely on more caffeine. When that stopped working, all the temptations around you started to look much more appealing, and that sense of drive and commitment you had before slowly faded away. This is you running out of willpower.

Willpower: what is it? Why is it limited?

The American Psychology Association describes willpower as “the ability to resist short-term temptations in order to meet long-term goals.” In the book “The Willpower Instinct”, Dr. Kelly McGonigal, explains how every person’s willpower is limited, and slowly depletes throughout the day. The more “willpower challenges” you face, the quicker your reserve drains. Dr. McGonigal divided the different types of willpower challenges you might encounter in three categories:

  • I will: We face this type of challenge whenever we should do something, but we simply don’t feel like getting it done right now.
  • I won’t: We face this challenge when we try to resist temptation, or we try to keep cool in stressful situations.
  • I want: This is a particular type of challenge where we keep track of our long term goals, dreams, and desires. In this instance, we feel like we should take action right now to come one step closer to the goal. 

It’s easy to recognize it when you face a willpower challenge because you literally “feel it in your body.” Imagine being really hungry and walking in front of a bakery. The sight and the smell of pastries quickly triggers an “I won’t” type of challenge, and it takes a severe amount of effort and energy to walk away.

Every time you manage to win one of those challenges, a little bit of your willpower reserve gets used. The more challenges you face daily, the harder it will be to stay true to your goals.

Can you train or recharge your willpower?

A growing body of research suggests that willpower should be considered a muscle. To strengthen it, you should exercise it regularly, but you should not overwork it. Therefore, we shouldn’t try to “be good” at all times. Instead, we should learn how to relax and recharge our willpower.

The general advice on how to improve willpower involves sleep, proper nutrition, and regular exercise. This broad and general recommendation is often not downright applicable by most, because it consists of changing various daily habits. Luckily, three very effective hacks have been discovered, that have an immediate effect on our willpower and take just a few minutes to apply.

Here are the 3 ways to refill your willpower reserves:

1. Focused breathing

Breathing, when done correctly, can stimulate the release of calming hormones while reducing the release of stress hormones like cortisol and catecholamines. To make this effective, you should deeply and slowly inhale through the nose for at least five seconds. Fill your belly with air first, then your chest, and when there’s no more space for air, still try to do tiny inhalations through the nose.

You should feel a pulling sensation around your neck and trapezius muscles. Once your lungs are full, try to hold the breath for five seconds, then slowly exhale through the mouth for at least five seconds. If you repeat this process ten to twenty times, you should feel dramatically more relaxed. Use this method several times a day, especially when you’re experiencing high levels of stress or anxiety.

2. Reward yourself when you accomplish a micro goal

According to a recent study, frequent instant rewards can boost motivation, and therefore, willpower. Creating your own reward system can help you to accomplish your to-do list, and also resist temptations. Since every individual has different tastes, you should come up with creative ideas about the small and frequent rewards you will give yourself upon winning any willpower challenge.

You can see this hack in practice in Apps like the popular Duolinguo, where after completing each lesson you get presented with a chance to open a treasure chest. This rewarding system seems to keep the users much more likely to keep learning new lessons.

3. Taking cold showers

Your body has an autonomic response to cold water. Getting into a cold shower is a difficult (but minor) willpower challenge on its own. As I previously mentioned, winning a willpower challenge strengthens your willpower muscle. Having a morning cold shower, on top of having multiple health benefits, will set you up for a positive winning streak of further challenges.

High performance is the sum of many small habits. Successful people don’t have an unlimited reserve of willpower, but they do have a set of daily rituals that made them succeed. These three hacks are some of the most effective techniques to develop willpower, but some of them may not fit every individual. You should try to find the perfect mix of daily practices that best fits your lifestyle and likes, so that you can strengthen your willpower muscle and perform better at work.

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