There are so many lies that society ingrained inside of you, that you adopted as you own. From your parents to your teachers, these lies snuck into your life, without you even realizing it.
Now it’s time to uncover them to achieve the success you truly deserve.
Here are 7 ludicrous lies you tell yourself that keep you away from success.
1. I shouldn’t fail
The most successful people fail and they fail often. If you want to speed up your path to success, take goal-aligned actions that are above what you think you’re capable of every single day.
Failing involves trying and moving out of your comfort zone. If you avoid the risk of failing, you are setting yourself up for failure by default.
“When we give ourselves permission to fail, we, at the same time, give ourselves permission to excel.” ~ Eloise Ristad
2. I shouldn’t be scared
We live in a society that tells us, “you must overcome your fears and radically eliminate them”. This makes us thrive towards an unrealistic state that we may never achieve.
Fear will only disappear when you do nothing, try nothing, be nothing.
It disappears when you stay within your comfort zone and avoid taking any kind of risks – but for that, you pay the price of a boring life.
The difference between those who succeed and those who don’t is not their degree of fear – but how they respond to it.
As Stephen Pressfield famously wrote in the ‘War of Art’:
(“The amateur believes he must first overcome his fear; then he can do his work. The professional knows that fear can never be overcome. He knows there is no such thing as a fearless warrior or a dread-free artist.” ~Steven Pressfield)
Accept your fears and use it as a catapult for progress by doing what needs to get done.
3. I should be able to do it alone
Successful people create an environment that supports their goals and surrounds themselves with the right people.
You don’t have to do it alone and find all the answers yourself. A friend of mine once said:
“The more you ask, the more you can get.”
If asking makes you feel uncomfortable, become a giver. A person that gives feels no discomfort in asking, they see it as a mutual exchange of love.
“The strong individual is the one who asks for help when he needs it. ~ Rona Barret (Retweet this)
4. My circumstances are my problem
People view the problems that they encounter external to themselves. They blame others for what is happening or not happening. They blame the economy, the environment or anything else they can find.
Life is a projection and your problems are mere delusions of your thinking. In the philosopher’s notes on ‘Love what is’ by Byron Katie, there is a great little story that goes like this:
Imagine you’re in the cinema watching a movie. When the movie starts, you notice some smudge on the screen. So, you get up and try to wipe it off – but it doesn’t go away. You try harder and harder, but nothing changes. You get frustrated and annoyed and can’t enjoy the movie anymore.
The problem was never the screen but rather the projector that had smudge on its lens. Your mind is the projector and your life the movie screen. If you see smudge on the screen , you don’t need to wipe down the screen – but the projector that projects it.
Don’t go through life thinking you need to change the “movie screen” – your life – instead change the projector by changing the way you think.
5. I shouldn’t struggle
Your struggles are not your problem – your response to them is. Some say the word struggle derived from Proto-Germanic “strūkōną” – “to be stiff”. When you struggle, you don’t flow with life, accept, and embrace life as it comes.
What if you see your struggles as gifts that give you the optimal opportunities to grow, develop and mature? Eliminate the idea of struggles and problems: Life either presents itself as “blissful experiences or as blissful opportunities to learn”.
“Education comes from within; you get it by struggle and effort and thought.“ ~ Napoleon Hill
6. I just need to fix my weaknesses
Your areas of strength offer the biggest room for personal growth. Instead of wasting your time fixing weaknesses, going from terrible to mediocre, spend your time and energy to develop excellence. This can only be achieved by focusing on your natural talents and developing them into strengths.
Successful people are not well-rounded,instead they capitalize on their strengths and manage around their weaknesses. By fixing your weaknesses, you ultimately aim for average. It’s not the path to glory.
Play to win instead of play not to lose.
“Emphasize strengths, don’t fix weaknesses.” ~ Tim Ferriss
7. I need to have the end in mind
Stephen Covey talked about beginning with the end in mind, having a clear focus on where you are heading. But constant thinking about your goals means being mentally in the future, disengaged from the current moment.
Being mindfully present in the now with focused attention on the task, is the key ingredient for high performance.
In his book ‘Overachievement’, psychologist John Eliot explains that overachievers act in the “trusting mindset”, being total engaged in what they are doing, without thought.
To live your best life, be present and mentally engaged in the now. Success starts in this very moment, with the choices you make right now.
Yes, keep the end in my mind. Plan, dream and visualize – but have the “present moment” more present in mind. Will Smith was right when he said:
Which lie are you telling yourself? Let me know in the comments below!