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Are You Sabotaging Your Future Self? Here’s What You Should Know

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I get the feeling we’ve all heard what it takes to be successful. We’ve probably heard it time and time again. I would go as far as saying there isn’t a secret step, ingredient, or set of bullet points you need to follow to be successful. 

If you had the opportunity to sit down and talk with successful people and ask them whatever you wanted about their success, do you think they would give a lot of the same answers? Maybe they wouldn’t give the same answers, but how about what characteristics or the “how did you become so successful?”

If you asked any top athlete, leader of an industry, mogul, or anyone that has achieved a level of success, I would be willing to bet they would all say, “they did whatever it takes to become successful.” 

They would all probably say, it takes dedication, self-discipline, desire, working tirelessly, focus, and a whole list of other attributes we’ve all heard before. But the bottom line is, they did whatever it took to achieve their level of success. 

And I’m talking about self-made women and men, not silver-spoon kids inheriting their wealth. Sure, some people were in the right place at the right time, but they all inevitably had to make sacrifices.

Why you need to sacrifice the short term for long term

What I’m driving towards is you need to sacrifice short-term gratification for long-term wins.

Over the past several decades, there have been numerous tests on delayed gratification. You may have heard of some of these tests.

To summarize, they would bring kids into a room, with some cookies on a table. They would explain to the kids, they can have one cookie now, or, if they wait 15 minutes, they could have two cookies. Naturally, some of the kids couldn’t resist and ate the cookie immediately, while other kids resisted the temptation and received the reward of two cookies after 15 minutes. The study goes on to show, the kids that were able to resist the immediate gratification, tended to have better SAT scores, better social skills, and were likely to achieve a level of success.

As adults, we’ve all experienced this, and gladly accept the short-term gratification over the long-term benefits. We know that eating fast-food or drinking excessive amounts of alcohol and not engaging in daily exercise is a poor decision, yet we still hammer down those fries. If we want to lose weight, we know that drinking soda, eating sugary snacks, and pizza will prevent us from reaching our goal. But so many people just can’t look past the short-term gratification. 

“The ability to discipline yourself to delay gratification in the short term in order to enjoy greater rewards in the long term, is the indispensable prerequisite for success.” – Brian Tracy

In school, we know that keeping up on our studies will work better than cramming for a test the night before. Yet, we substituted watching a movie, partying, hanging out with friends, or whatever it was that brought us short-term gratification.

In the business world, if you’re self-employed, you don’t just work 8-5 Monday-Friday. You’re basically on call all the time. If you want to beat out your competitors, you need to be willing to do what your competitors won’t. If financial success or being on top is your end goal, you need to be willing to sacrifice weekend trips to the lake or watching the game on Sunday, or whatever it is that provides you immediate gratification.

It’s not a complex thought to realize if someone else is willing to do something you won’t because you’re playing golf, or drinking margaritas on the beach, they will take your spot. They will get the new business, and most likely the return business.

Top athletes constantly practice, workout, and study their opponents. They put in the work that will put them at the top. That trophy or goal at the end is what they strive for, so they delay the short-term gratification, put in the hard work, to get that long-term win. And that is what it takes to be successful.

How it’s relatable to your life

Finally, an example virtually all of us can relate to. Getting up early (like 5 am) seems to be a critical habit for successful people. If you work a normal 40-hour workweek with 8-5 normal hours, this means you have 15 hours where you’re not at work. Let’s subtract 8 hours for a decent night’s rest. This leaves you with 7 hours.

How much of that 7 hours is taken up via, watching tv in the evening? The average adult spends 4-5 hours watching tv, daily. Look it up. If you’re watching tv, relaxing, goofing off, then being successful is not as important to you, as you might think. You have to be willing to sacrifice activities that will bring you short-term relief or gratification. If you don’t, you’ll never hit your long-term goals.

A year from now, you’ll either be making strides to achieving your goals, or you’ll be sitting on the couch, remote in hand, wishing you would have started a year ago. Winning will always be achieved by sacrificing your short-term gratifications for your long-term goals!   

My name is Nicole Frazier. I”m passionate about women’s health and fitness, and have been so for 25+ years. My goal is to share what I’ve learned to educate and inspire others to live a healthier life. I firmly believe that if we consumed proper nutrition and exercised regularly, health issues related to obesity would drop dramatically. Not only would we benefit physically, but mental health would improve as well. I have a website https://thetonedwoman.com/ that I post what I’ve learned and what I think can help those looking to lead a better, healthier life. Check out my post on how to get fit at home by clicking here.

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Life

9 Harsh Truths Every Young Man Must Face to Succeed in the Modern World

Before chasing success, every young man needs to face these 9 brutal realities shaping masculinity in the modern world.

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Image Credit: Midjourney

Many young men today quietly battle depression, loneliness, and a sense of confusion about who they’re meant to be.

Some blame the lack of deep friendships or romantic relationships. Others feel lost in a digital world that often labels traditional masculinity as “toxic.”

But the truth is this: becoming a man in the modern age takes more than just surviving. It takes resilience, direction, and a willingness to grow even when no one’s watching.

Success doesn’t arrive by accident or luck. It’s built on discipline, sacrifice, and consistency.

Here are 9 harsh truths every young man should know if he wants to thrive, not just survive, in the digital age.

1. Never Use Your Illness as an Excuse

As Dr. Jordan B. Peterson often says, successful people don’t complain; they act.

Your illness, hardship, or struggle shouldn’t define your limits; it should define your motivation. Rest when you must, but always get back up and keep building your dreams. Motivation doesn’t appear magically. It comes after you take action.

Here are five key lessons I’ve learned from Dr. Peterson:

  • Learn to write clearly; clarity of thought makes you dangerous.

  • Read quality literature in your free time.

  • Nurture a strong relationship with your family.

  • Share your ideas publicly; your voice matters.

  • Become a “monster”, powerful, but disciplined enough to control it.

The best leaders and thinkers are grounded. They welcome criticism, adapt quickly, and keep moving forward no matter what.

2. You Can’t Please Everyone And That’s Okay

You don’t need a crowd of people to feel fulfilled. You need a few friends who genuinely accept you for who you are.

If your circle doesn’t bring out your best, it’s okay to walk away. Solitude can be a powerful teacher. It gives you space to understand what you truly want from life. Remember, successful men aren’t people-pleasers; they’re purpose-driven.

3. You Can Control the Process, Not the Outcome

Especially in creative work, writing, business, or content creation, you control effort, not results.

You might publish two articles a day, but you can’t dictate which one will go viral. Focus on mastery, not metrics. Many great writers toiled for years in obscurity before anyone noticed them. Rejection, criticism, and indifference are all part of the path.

The best creators focus on storytelling, not applause.

4. Rejection Is Never Personal

Rejection doesn’t mean you’re unworthy. It simply means your offer, idea, or timing didn’t align.

Every successful person has faced rejection repeatedly. What separates them is persistence and perspective. They see rejection as feedback, not failure. The faster you learn that truth, the faster you’ll grow.

5. Women Value Comfort and Security

Understanding women requires maturity and empathy.

Through books, lectures, and personal growth, I’ve learned that most women desire a man who is grounded, intelligent, confident, emotionally stable, and consistent. Some want humor, others intellect, but nearly all want to feel safe and supported.

Instead of chasing attention, work on self-improvement. Build competence and confidence, and the rest will follow naturally.

6. There’s No Such Thing as Failure, Only Lessons

A powerful lesson from Neuro-Linguistic Programming: failure only exists when you stop trying.

Every mistake brings data. Every setback builds wisdom. The most successful men aren’t fearless. They’ve simply learned to act despite fear.

Be proud of your scars. They’re proof you were brave enough to try.

7. Public Speaking Is an Art Form

Public speaking is one of the most valuable and underrated skills a man can master.

It’s not about perfection; it’s about connection. The best speakers tell stories, inspire confidence, and make people feel seen. They research deeply, speak honestly, and practice relentlessly.

If you can speak well, you can lead, sell, teach, and inspire. Start small, practice at work, in class, or even in front of a mirror, and watch your confidence skyrocket.

8. Teaching Is Leadership in Disguise

Great teachers are not just knowledgeable. They’re brave, compassionate, and disciplined.

Teaching forces you to articulate what you know, and in doing so, you master it at a deeper level. Whether you’re mentoring a peer, leading a team, or sharing insights online, teaching refines your purpose.

Lifelong learners become lifelong leaders.

9. Study Human Nature to Achieve Your Dreams

One of the toughest lessons to accept: most people are self-interested.

That’s not cynicism, it’s human nature. Understanding this helps you navigate relationships, business, and communication more effectively.

Everyone has a darker side, but successful people learn to channel theirs productively into discipline, creativity, and drive.

Psychology isn’t just theory; it’s a toolkit. Learn how people think, act, and decide, and you’ll know how to lead them, influence them, and even understand yourself better.

Final Thoughts

The digital age offers endless opportunities, but only to those who are willing to take responsibility, confront discomfort, and keep improving.

Becoming a man today means embracing the hard truths most avoid.

Because at the end of the day, success isn’t about luck. It’s about who you become when life tests you the most.

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Change Your Mindset

The Four Types of Happiness: Which One Are You Living In?

Most people chase success only to find emptiness, this model reveals why true happiness lies somewhere else.

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In a world driven by rapid technological growth and constant competition, many people unknowingly trade joy for achievement. (more…)

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Change Your Mindset

The Secret Daily Routines Behind History’s Most Brilliant Thinkers

Uncover the daily rituals and hidden habits that powered history’s most brilliant minds to success.

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Why Daily Rituals Matter

Every great achiever has one thing in common: discipline. Behind the novels, inventions, discoveries, and masterpieces are small, consistent habits repeated daily. (more…)

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Finances

From Debt to Financial Independence: A Practical Roadmap Anyone Can Follow

It’s about having control over your money and not letting money control you.

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The 21st century has brought incredible opportunities but also new challenges. Rapid technological change, global uncertainty, and shifting lifestyles have made many people think more deeply about financial freedom. (more…)

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