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Jesus Almighty, I Epically Screwed Up A Speech!

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One of the greatest skills you can master is public speaking and Warren Buffet agrees.

No Jedi Master skill like public speaking is achieved easily. It takes a lot of practice and a tremendous amount of instant feedback. Many people get up and speak all the time with no feedback and continually make rookie mistakes.

This weekend I competed in my first serious public speaking competition.

JESUS ALMIGHTY, I stuffed it up big time!!!

Here’s what I did wrong:

Awkwardly cut off audience laughter.

My speech was totally impromptu (that was the contest type) and it ended up being funny without me intending it to be. I see myself as very “unfunny” yet the audience was in hysterics. My topic was “A week doesn’t go by without….”

I chose to address a week not going by without facing fear. I talked about many things but one of them was my fear of blood tests. I described a recent experience which I thought was serious and the audience laughed as I demonstrated how the nurse took my blood like a vampire.

Because I wasn’t prepared for laughter I kept cutting the audience off. I tried to talk over their loud laughter and it didn’t work so well. Oh well, I know for next time now 🙂

No suit.

I walked into the hall like I was Rocky Balboa. My friend walked up to me and said: “How come you’re in runners, jeans and a t-shirt.”

I told him that it was what I was comfortable in. He then informed me that for proper speeches you’re supposed to dress up in a suit or something similar. Error number two.

Running late.

I left home with fifty minutes to spare before my speaking gig. What I didn’t plan for was the traffic. This made me more stressed than I already was.

“Being on time so you can take a few deep breaths is crucial”

All the other speakers were early. I was so late I nearly missed the briefing. Unlike me, show up thirty minutes early and suss the venue out beforehand. Understand the speaking area, the out of bound parts of the room and take a peek at the audience.

The green room was awkward.

While you wait to go on stage, you wait in the green room to the side. I’m someone who likes to gather my thoughts and have a few stories in my mind. The usher kept talking to me and I didn’t handle it well.

If this happens to you, explain to the usher politely that you want silence. Try looking out the window if you need to so you can avoid eye contact and show that you’re preoccupied.

Didn’t talk long enough.

In this particular competition, you’re given a set time and ideally, you go as close to the end of the allocated slot as you can. I forgot to do this. This resulted in my talk being too short. Knowing the ideal time for your speech is crucial in a competition or even for a regular speech.

I didn’t talk to past contestants.

Many of the people there were friends and people who’d competed before. I forgot to ask for their advice and so I missed the walking around stage part and the timing advice.

Always talk to people who have been in your shoes before and achieved the same goal you’re aiming for. Epic fail on my part 🙁

Needed to use the stage.

In my Toastmasters club, we have a stage that is quite intimate and so we don’t move around much.

At this particular venue, the stage was huge and because I was used to a small stage, I forgot to move around. I stood there completely still, with a strong back, and many hand gestures, and delivered my speech.

Not moving around cost me valuable points although the audience was still thoroughly engaged.

Some things did go right though

It’s easy to focus on the negative. I did some things really well and you can try these if you ever end up delivering a speech – you should learn the superpower of speaking by the way.

Here’s what I did right:

Got into a peak state.

Before the contest started, I listened to my Tony Robbins pump up music mixtape. I sang really daggy songs like Tina Turner – You’re Simply The Best.

As I was driving to the gig, people driving next to me were laughing at my singing actions. Physically feeling your way into a peak state is fundamental. If you feel on top of the world, then you’ll deliver a killer speech in my experience.

Body language was spot on.

I stood tall and didn’t slouch during my speech. I pushed my shoulders back and chest forward. I told myself “I am the expert!”

I used lots of hand gestures and did a funny demo of what it was like to get a needle in my arm.

People were laughing very loudly.

Humor in a speech is very hard to do and it gets people’s attention. I did this accidentally and it worked like a treat. Changing people’s state and making them feel positive emotions helps them to remember you, and ultimately vote for you.

“The best way to make people laugh is to make an idiot of yourself on purpose”

I often tell audiences that I’m a huge tall guy, with a big head and spiky hair. It always eases any tension in the room including my own.

Shared a vulnerable story.

My speech was unique because I talked about the lows of my recent career battles. I showed my battle scars and the emotions that came with them. The story had a beginning, middle and an end.

There were strong pauses.

Silence and gaps in a speech allow the material to breathe. People need time to take in emotional moments and really feel what you’re saying. Silence adds tension, drama and variety to your speech.

I rolled up to win, not lose.

My mindset the whole time was that I was going to win. When it came time to announce the winner, I even put my drink bottle away, stood up, and was ready to walk towards the stage. It wasn’t to be.

The main point here though is that I believed in myself – hence I stood up when the winner was announced. You can’t achieve any audacious goal unless you show up to win.

I used heaps of passion.

I let the audience have everything I had at that moment in time. I left nothing in the fuel tank. I used every ounce of passion, energy and excitement in my body. Passion sells a story and speech better than anything.

People see you as authentic when you show them passion in your speech.

“There are so many presentations, talks and speeches that we’ve all seen where the speaker lacks passion. It’s boring to listen to and forgettable”

You have to capture the audience in the first five seconds with your passion. Show how much you want to be there and put your heart and soul into it.

The end result.

I screwed up the speech, came last and didn’t make it to the next round. I was the favorite and everyone thought I would win. While I may have messed up the competition I did learn just how powerful public speaking can be.

Being able to move people with your words is a useful skill in every career. Now I have more insight than I ever did before and I’ll come back next year with a new approach. The basics of passion, storytelling and energy are universal though.

Get out there and deliver a speech – that’s my advice to you.

If you want to increase your productivity and learn some more valuable life hacks, then join my private mailing list on timdenning.net

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9 Harsh Truths Every Young Man Must Face to Succeed in the Modern World

Before chasing success, every young man needs to face these 9 brutal realities shaping masculinity in the modern world.

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Many young men today quietly battle depression, loneliness, and a sense of confusion about who they’re meant to be.

Some blame the lack of deep friendships or romantic relationships. Others feel lost in a digital world that often labels traditional masculinity as “toxic.”

But the truth is this: becoming a man in the modern age takes more than just surviving. It takes resilience, direction, and a willingness to grow even when no one’s watching.

Success doesn’t arrive by accident or luck. It’s built on discipline, sacrifice, and consistency.

Here are 9 harsh truths every young man should know if he wants to thrive, not just survive, in the digital age.

1. Never Use Your Illness as an Excuse

As Dr. Jordan B. Peterson often says, successful people don’t complain; they act.

Your illness, hardship, or struggle shouldn’t define your limits; it should define your motivation. Rest when you must, but always get back up and keep building your dreams. Motivation doesn’t appear magically. It comes after you take action.

Here are five key lessons I’ve learned from Dr. Peterson:

  • Learn to write clearly; clarity of thought makes you dangerous.

  • Read quality literature in your free time.

  • Nurture a strong relationship with your family.

  • Share your ideas publicly; your voice matters.

  • Become a “monster”, powerful, but disciplined enough to control it.

The best leaders and thinkers are grounded. They welcome criticism, adapt quickly, and keep moving forward no matter what.

2. You Can’t Please Everyone And That’s Okay

You don’t need a crowd of people to feel fulfilled. You need a few friends who genuinely accept you for who you are.

If your circle doesn’t bring out your best, it’s okay to walk away. Solitude can be a powerful teacher. It gives you space to understand what you truly want from life. Remember, successful men aren’t people-pleasers; they’re purpose-driven.

3. You Can Control the Process, Not the Outcome

Especially in creative work, writing, business, or content creation, you control effort, not results.

You might publish two articles a day, but you can’t dictate which one will go viral. Focus on mastery, not metrics. Many great writers toiled for years in obscurity before anyone noticed them. Rejection, criticism, and indifference are all part of the path.

The best creators focus on storytelling, not applause.

4. Rejection Is Never Personal

Rejection doesn’t mean you’re unworthy. It simply means your offer, idea, or timing didn’t align.

Every successful person has faced rejection repeatedly. What separates them is persistence and perspective. They see rejection as feedback, not failure. The faster you learn that truth, the faster you’ll grow.

5. Women Value Comfort and Security

Understanding women requires maturity and empathy.

Through books, lectures, and personal growth, I’ve learned that most women desire a man who is grounded, intelligent, confident, emotionally stable, and consistent. Some want humor, others intellect, but nearly all want to feel safe and supported.

Instead of chasing attention, work on self-improvement. Build competence and confidence, and the rest will follow naturally.

6. There’s No Such Thing as Failure, Only Lessons

A powerful lesson from Neuro-Linguistic Programming: failure only exists when you stop trying.

Every mistake brings data. Every setback builds wisdom. The most successful men aren’t fearless. They’ve simply learned to act despite fear.

Be proud of your scars. They’re proof you were brave enough to try.

7. Public Speaking Is an Art Form

Public speaking is one of the most valuable and underrated skills a man can master.

It’s not about perfection; it’s about connection. The best speakers tell stories, inspire confidence, and make people feel seen. They research deeply, speak honestly, and practice relentlessly.

If you can speak well, you can lead, sell, teach, and inspire. Start small, practice at work, in class, or even in front of a mirror, and watch your confidence skyrocket.

8. Teaching Is Leadership in Disguise

Great teachers are not just knowledgeable. They’re brave, compassionate, and disciplined.

Teaching forces you to articulate what you know, and in doing so, you master it at a deeper level. Whether you’re mentoring a peer, leading a team, or sharing insights online, teaching refines your purpose.

Lifelong learners become lifelong leaders.

9. Study Human Nature to Achieve Your Dreams

One of the toughest lessons to accept: most people are self-interested.

That’s not cynicism, it’s human nature. Understanding this helps you navigate relationships, business, and communication more effectively.

Everyone has a darker side, but successful people learn to channel theirs productively into discipline, creativity, and drive.

Psychology isn’t just theory; it’s a toolkit. Learn how people think, act, and decide, and you’ll know how to lead them, influence them, and even understand yourself better.

Final Thoughts

The digital age offers endless opportunities, but only to those who are willing to take responsibility, confront discomfort, and keep improving.

Becoming a man today means embracing the hard truths most avoid.

Because at the end of the day, success isn’t about luck. It’s about who you become when life tests you the most.

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