Connect with us

Success Advice

The Best Way To Deal With A**H@&#s? Don’t Become One

Published

on

I found myself recently having to deal with a total a$$. All I did was send a short email to confirm I was doing the right thing in relation to a small matter. The intent was to be respectful and brief.

This guy sends me back a rude email that doesn’t answer my question and insinuates that I’m trying to self-promote myself and another person. Clearly, this person doesn’t read my blog posts or understand my mantra: “Success is not about you.”

Given that this person holds one of the many keys to my success, I was temporarily defeated. They took the wind out of my sail for a few brief moments. That’s until the personal development program that’s stored in my brain kicked in.

Before I knew it, I had broken the effect of the a$$ pattern, taken a chill pill, and made the decision not to be an a$$ back. None of this was easy, but success never is. It takes discipline and an outside view of what your senses are experiencing to gain a positive perspective.

Our initial internal reaction to an a$$ is not what matters; it’s the actions towards the other person that can empower us or ruin our mindset. I’ve since responded to this a$$ and not heard back. I’ve already decided to go around them and find someone else who can help me get the same results. There’s always another way.

Here are some quick tips for dealing with a$$’s like this turd burger:

 

1. Don’t become one yourself

The worst thing you can do is respond to an a$$ by becoming one yourself. It was so tempting for me to reply to this email with some smart-ass response like, “Check out my blog posts you twerp! You’re wrong.”

Reacting to negativity like this is playing the short game. The key is to do nothing initially. Let the negative emotions subside and pretend for a second that the previous correspondence was a mistake.

“How you react is a reflection of you, not the a$$ you’re dealing with”


2. Talk nicely

It’s damn tempting to reply to nasty words with your own repertoire (I know mine’s very long..haha). Fighting fire with fire will only make the situation worse. The best way to diffuse an a$$ is to do the opposite of what they’re doing. Kill them with niceness.

A true a$$ can’t stay as one when you don’t acknowledge their status. Their “a$$ status” is what defines them and being kind to them is not something they know how to deal with. It’s because they haven’t dealt with their demons, that they’ve become an a$$ in the first place.

Maybe you can help them deal with their problems? I know it can be hard, so sometimes it’s better to stay away. Grab a roll of Police Tape, corner off the area, and stay the heck away. Find someone else who can help you achieve the same goal.

What I’ve realized is that when an a$$ is blocking your way, there is always another person that can be the shining light to a different route towards your success. The problem is not you just remember that!

 

3. Assume they have a big ego

A$$’s want you to get angry and stroke their ego. The reason they’re an a$$ in the first place is that their ego is out of control. They’ve forgotten how unimportant they are in the scheme of the entire universe.

Our ego is what can make us think we’re more successful and beautiful than we are. No matter how well things are going and you’re social status in society, remember that it can all disappear overnight. Eventually, someone is going to report the a$$ you’re dealing with to someone who holds power over them.

We all have someone who holds us accountable. Finding an a$$’s accountability partner is the best way to snap them out of their trance. It’s not about revenge; it’s about helping them to be successful in the long term.

 

4. A$$’s make a lot of assumptions

The key trait of an a$$ is that they make a lot of assumptions. They assume that you intended on something you did not. It’s their assumptions that have caused their mind to lose track of reality. When we assume, we draw conclusions that are complete delusions.

This is why a$$’s seem so crazy because they’re borderline delusional. To overcome an a$$’s assumptions, challenge them. Find out what they’ve assumed about you and then bust their myths to pieces with cold hard facts. Do so in a polite, non-emotional way.

It’s about letting the truth shine through and not being chained down by their unfair treatment of you and your situation. Forget sympathy; fight for what’s right instead. A$$’s are weak at heart, and you can either enhance their weakness further or suppress it and be the positive change they need in their life.

When an a$$ has made assumptions about me, I’ve often made the mistake of making assumptions back. By playing the assumption game, we run the risk of becoming an a$$ ourselves.

“An a$$ wants to multiply their population, so they stop feeling lonely. You can either be the sperm to their egg or the eradicator of their disease”

My hope is that you’ll make the right choice and not become an a$$. The A$$ Academy is growing thanks to the Internet, and so we need to be even more diligent than ever not to become one accidentally.

The a$$ trap comes with a whole host of inclusions that none of us want like: no love, no emotion, an ugly ego, and a smile like the devil. Choose hope! Choose love! Choose compassion!

How do you deal with a$$’s? Let me know on my website timdenning.net or my Facebook.
Advertisement
Click to comment

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Success Advice

Why One-Size-Fits-All Leadership Will Always Fail (and What Works Instead)

The surprising truth about leadership styles that can make or break your team’s success.

Published

on

Why one-size-fits-all leadership doesn’t work
Image Credit: Midjourney

Leadership has always been as much about people as it is about performance. Ken Blanchard, in his influential book, “The One Minute Manager”, put it simply: different strokes for different folks. (more…)

Continue Reading

Success Advice

What Every New CEO Must Do in Their First 100 Days (or Risk Failure)

Your first 100 days as CEO could define your entire legacy, here’s how to make every move count

Published

on

leadership tips for new CEO
Image Credit: Midjourney

When Tim Cook took over from Steve Jobs at Apple, the world watched with bated breath. Jobs wasn’t just a CEO; he was a visionary, an icon, and a legend of innovative leadership. (more…)

Continue Reading

Entrepreneurs

The Leadership Shift Every Company Needs in 2025

Struggling to keep your team engaged? Here’s how leaders can turn frustrated employees into loyal advocates.

Published

on

Bridging the gap between employees and employers
Image Credit: Midjourney

In workplaces around the world, there’s a growing gap between employers and employees and between superiors and their teams. It’s a common refrain: “People don’t leave companies, they leave bad bosses.”

While there are, of course, cases where management could do better, this isn’t just a “bad boss” problem. The relationship between leaders and employees is complex. Instead of assigning blame, we should explore practical solutions to build stronger, healthier workplaces where everyone thrives.

Why This Gap Exists

Every workplace needs someone to guide, supervise, and provide feedback. That’s essential for productivity and performance. But because there are usually far more employees than managers, dissatisfaction, fair or not, spreads quickly.

What if, instead of focusing on blame, we focused on building trust, empathy, and communication? This is where modern leadership and human-centered management can make a difference.

Tools and Techniques to Bridge the Gap

Here are proven strategies leaders and employees can use to foster stronger relationships and create a workplace where people actually want to stay.

1. Practice Mutual Empathy

Both managers and employees need to recognize they are ultimately on the same team. Leaders have to balance people and performance, and often face intense pressure to hit targets. Employees who understand this reality are more likely to cooperate and problem-solve collaboratively.

2. Maintain Professional Boundaries

Superiors should separate personal issues from professional decision-making. Consistency, fairness, and integrity build trust, and trust is the foundation of a motivated team.

3. Follow the Golden Rule

Treat people how you would like to be treated. This simple principle encourages compassion and respect, two qualities every effective leader must demonstrate.

4. Avoid Micromanagement

Micromanaging stifles creativity and damages morale. Great leaders see themselves as partners, not just bosses, and treat their teams as collaborators working toward a shared goal.

5. Empower Employees to Grow

Empowerment means giving employees responsibility that matches their capacity, and then trusting them to deliver. Encourage them to take calculated risks, learn from mistakes, and problem-solve independently. If something goes wrong, turn it into a learning opportunity, not a reprimand.

6. Communicate in All Directions

Communication shouldn’t just be top-down. Invite feedback, create open channels for suggestions, and genuinely listen to what your people have to say. Healthy upward communication closes gaps before they become conflicts.

7. Overcome Insecurities

Many leaders secretly fear being outshone by younger, more tech-savvy employees. Instead of resisting, embrace the chance to learn from them. Humility earns respect and helps the team innovate faster.

8. Invest in Coaching and Mentorship

True leaders grow other leaders. Provide mentorship, career guidance, and stretch opportunities so employees can develop new skills. Leadership is learned through experience, but guided experience is even more powerful.

9. Eliminate Favoritism

Avoid cliques and office politics. Decisions should be based on facts and fairness, not gossip. Objective, transparent decision-making builds credibility.

10. Recognize Efforts Promptly

Recognition often matters more than rewards. Publicly appreciate employees’ contributions and do so consistently and fairly. A timely “thank you” can be more motivating than a quarterly bonus.

11. Conduct Thoughtful Exit Interviews

When employees leave, treat it as an opportunity to learn. Keep interviews confidential and use the insights to improve management practices and culture.

12. Provide Leadership Development

Train managers to lead, not just supervise. Leadership development programs help shift mindsets from “command and control” to “coach and empower.” This transformation has a direct impact on morale and retention.

13. Adopt Soft Leadership Principles

Today’s workforce, largely millennials and Gen Z, value collaboration over hierarchy. Soft leadership focuses on partnership, mutual respect, and shared purpose, rather than rigid top-down control.

The Bigger Picture: HR’s Role

Mercer’s global research highlights five key priorities for organizations:

  • Build diverse talent pipelines

  • Embrace flexible work models

  • Design compelling career paths

  • Simplify HR processes

  • Redefine the value HR brings

The challenge? Employers and employees often view these priorities differently. Bridging that perception gap is just as important as bridging the relational gap between leaders and staff.

Treat Employees Like Associates, Not Just Staff

When you treat employees like partners, they bring their best selves to work. HR leaders must develop strategies to keep talent engaged, empowered, and prepared for the future.

Organizational success starts with people, always. Build the relationship with your team first, and the results will follow.

Continue Reading

Entrepreneurs

What Makes an Entrepreneurial Leader? Traits of the World’s Best Innovators

Inside the mindset of entrepreneurial leaders who transform risk, passion, and vision into world-changing results.

Published

on

entrepreneurial leadership skills and traits
Image Credit: Midjourney

When you think of Richard Branson (Virgin Group), Bill Gates (Microsoft), Steve Jobs (Apple), Rupert Murdoch (News Corporation), and Ted Turner (CNN), one thing becomes clear: they are not just entrepreneurs, they are entrepreneurial leaders. (more…)

Continue Reading

Trending