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5 Steps to Living Your Personal Legend

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Derek Sivers said, “Don’t be on your deathbed someday having squandered your one chance at life, full of regret because you pursued little distractions instead of big dreams.”

Those big dreams are what Paulo Coelho called “Personal Legends” in The Alchemist. It’s comparable to your life purpose.

When you live your Personal Legend, you tend to experience synchronicities, live life in flow and are well on your way to self-actualization. That’s the path to soul-level fulfillment.

Deep down, every human longs for a sense of purpose and meaning in life. The problem is that we often seek those in the wrong places. Fulfillment doesn’t come from grandiose accomplishments, prestige, or doing what others expect of us; it comes from living our Personal Legends.

When we ignore the inner call to pursue that particular path, we go through life with a nagging feeling that something is missing. We also risk ending up with regrets in the future. However, that’s totally avoidable; there’s still time to pursue your Personal Legend.

Here’s how you can do it.

1. Follow the Breadcrumbs

To live your Personal Legend, you must follow your heart—your heart-centered dreams and desires. Those are the things that make you feel alive, inspired, excited, and energized and that spark curiosity within you.

Too many people discard their dreams because they’ve convinced themselves that they aren’t “reasonable.” But your heart-centered desires aren’t just childish fantasies; they are breadcrumbs guiding you to your most authentic and fulfilling life.

Plus, as Paulo Coelho wrote, “You will never be able to escape from your heart, so it’s better to listen to what it has to say.”

2. Don’t Fall for the Ego’s “Wants” or the “Shoulds” of Society

One of the main difficulties in living our Personal Legends is differentiating our heart’s desires from the “wants” of our egos or the “shoulds” of conditioning.

The ego’s “wants” are rooted in fear, need, and feelings of lack. For example, when I was a teenager, I dreamed of becoming a famous actress and living in Hollywood. I was doing theater and enjoyed acting, but wanting to be famous wasn’t a heart-centered desire; it was just my ego. My ego craved recognition and praise. It wanted to feel important.

As for the desires that come from conditioning, those are the things our education and society taught us we “should” do. For example, I went to university because I was told growing up that intelligent people get college degrees (which, of course, is untrue). I wasn’t particularly excited about going to university, and it ended up being a waste of time and money.

To differentiate your heart-centered dreams and desires from those of your ego or conditioning, write down what you want. Next, for each thing, write down why you want it. Ask yourself “why” five times to go deeper. Then, look at the reasons you want each item on your list. Is it to receive praise, obtain a certain social status, or feel superior to others? That’s the ego. Is it because you were told it’s what you should do? That’s conditioning. Is it because it makes you feel alive, vibrant, and inspired? That’s your heart.

3. Commit to Pursuing Your Personal Legend

Pursuing our Personal Legends requires commitment, even devotion. If we keep putting our dreams on the back burner, we’re not committed and probably won’t achieve them.

To commit to your dreams, you can start by writing them down and reading them daily. You can also create a vision board and even visualize them. Most importantly, make room for them in your life. If you feel curious about salsa dancing, take a class. If you love animals, why not volunteer at a shelter once a week? If you feel drawn to deserts, plan a trip to visit one.

My mom has always felt drawn to deserts. She asked for a travel book with beautiful images of deserts around the world for Christmas, collects silk scarfs, and has photos of Northern Africa all over her office’s wall. But she never went on a trip to see one with her own eyes. “It’s too complicated,” she’d explain. “It’s too far.” A portion of her Personal Legend will die within her, and it’s a bit sad.

4. Rely On Your Inner Knowing

Perhaps you’ve heard the saying, “The quickest way to kill a dream is to tell a small-minded person about it.” Until you’re entirely confident in your ability to make your dream come true, it’s best to keep it to yourself or, at least, only share it with those you know will support you.

Especially don’t share your dream just to seek validation. When you seek validation, you aren’t entirely confident in yourself, and it’s in those moments that your vision is the most at risk of being crushed by “small-minded people” or people who don’t understand what you’re trying to accomplish.

Plus, no one knows what your Personal Legend is better than you, so their opinion should hold very little value. Learn to trust your own inner knowing and not rely on external validation.

5. Feel the Fear and Go for It Anyway

Paulo Coelho wrote in The Alchemist, “Don’t give in to your fears. If you do, you won’t be able to follow your heart. […] There is only one thing that makes a dream impossible to achieve: the fear of failure.”

When you set out to live your Personal Legend, you inevitably encounter resistance—fears, doubts, and insecurities—that can sabotage your progress and success. That’s because living your Personal Legend requires you to step into the unknown, which your ego sees as risky. Your ego’s job is to keep you safe, meaning within the confines of what’s known and habitual. You need to be stronger than your ego. Feel the fear, take a deep breath, smile, and go for it.

Here’s an effective way to remove the resistance caused by fear: visualize yourself having achieved your goal. Because your subconscious mind doesn’t differentiate what’s real from what you vividly imagine, you’ll trick it into believing that you’ve already done it. And, since you’re still alive, your ego will also think that it’s safe for you to pursue that dream, and it won’t cause as much resistance.

Your heart-centered dreams aren’t childish fantasies; they are guiding you to living your Personal Legend, your life purpose. Dare to pursue them! You’ll thank yourself for it when you get to the end of your life.

Emilie is a certified life coach, spiritual entrepreneur, and creator from Canada (currently living in Mexico). She specializes in helping people clarify their purpose and make a profit from it (on their terms). You can get her free guide, “The Fastest Way to Uncover Your Purpose and Calling” or connect with her through her website consciousoriginals.com.

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Life

How Learning the Skill of Hope Can Change Everything

Hope isn’t wishful thinking. It’s a state of being and a skill that has profound evidence of helping people achieve success in life

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Hope as a skill
Image Credit: Midjourney

Hope isn’t wishful thinking. It’s a state of being and a skill that has profound evidence of helping people achieve success in life.

Wishful thinking, on the other hand, is like having dreams in the sky without a ladder to climb, having a destination without a map, or trying to operate a jet-engine airplane without instructions. It sounds nice but is impossible to realize. You don’t have what you need to make it happen!

What Real Hope Is

Real hope is actionable, practical, and realistic. Better yet, it’s feasible and can be learned.

One popular approach is Hope Theory. This concept is used by colleges to study how hope impacts students’ academic performance. Researchers found that students with high levels of hope achieve better grades and are more likely to graduate compared to those with less hope.

Hope can be broken down into two components:

  1. Pathways – The “how to” of hope. This is where people think of and establish plans for achieving their goals.
  2. Agency – The “I can” of hope. This is the belief that the person can accomplish their goals.

Does Hope Really Work?

According to Webster’s Dictionary, hope as a noun is defined as: “desire accompanied by expectation of or belief in fulfillment.”

As humans, we are wired to crave fulfillment. We have the ability to envision it and, through hope, make it a reality.

My Experience with Hope

For 13 years, I was a hopeless human. During my time working at a luxury hotel as a front desk agent earning $11.42 per hour, I felt the sting of hopelessness the most.

The regret of feeling my time was being stolen from me lingered every time I clocked in. Eventually, I decided to do something about it.

I gave myself permission to hope for something better. I began establishing pathways to success and regained agency by learning from self-help books and seeking mentorship.

Because I took action toward something I desired, I now feel more hope and joy than I ever felt hopelessness. Hope changed me.

Hope Actually Improves Your Life

Wishful thinking doesn’t work, and false hope is equally ineffective. Real hope, however, is directly tied to success in all areas of life.

Studies show that hopeful people tend to:

  • Demonstrate better problem-solving skills
  • Cultivate healthier relationships
  • Maintain stronger motivation to achieve goals
  • Exhibit better work ethic
  • Have a positive outlook on life

These benefits can impact work life, family life, habit-building, mental health, physical health, and spiritual practice. Imagine how much better your life could be by applying real hope to all these areas.

How to Develop the Skill to Hope

As acclaimed French writer Jean Giono wrote in The Man Who Planted Trees:
“There are also times in life when a person has to rush off in pursuit of hopefulness.”

If you are at one of those times, here are ways to develop the skill to hope:

1. Dream Again

To cultivate hope, you need to believe in its possibility. Start by:

  • Reflecting on what you’re passionate about, your values, and what you want to achieve.
  • Writing your dreams down, sharing them with someone encouraging, or saying them out loud.
  • Creating a vision board to make your dreams feel more tangible.

Dreams are the foundation of hope—they give you something meaningful to aspire toward.

2. Create an Environment of Hope

  • Set Goals: Write down your goals and create a plan to achieve them.
  • Visualize Success: Use inspirational quotes, photos, or tools like dumbbells or canvases to remind yourself of your goals.
  • Build a Resource Library: Collect books, eBooks, or audiobooks about hope and success to inspire you.

An environment that fosters hope will keep you motivated, resilient, and focused.

3. Face the Challenges

Don’t avoid challenges—overcoming them builds confidence. Participating in challenging activities, like strategic games, can enhance your problem-solving skills and reinforce hope.

4. Commit to Wisdom

Seek wisdom from those who have achieved what you aspire to. Whether through books, blogs, or social media platforms, learn from their journeys. Wisdom provides the foundation for real, actionable hope.

5. Take Note of Small Wins

Reflecting on past victories can fuel your hope for the future. Ask yourself:

  • What challenges have I already overcome?
  • How did I feel when I succeeded?

By remembering those feelings of happiness, relief, or satisfaction, your brain will naturally adopt a more hopeful mindset.

Conclusion

Hope is more than wishful thinking—it’s a powerful skill that can transform your life. By dreaming again, creating a hopeful environment, facing challenges, seeking wisdom, and celebrating small wins, you can develop the real hope necessary for success in all aspects of life.

Let hope guide you toward a brighter, more fulfilling future.

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Life

The 5 Stages of a Quarter-Life Crisis & What You Can Do

A quarter-life crisis isn’t a sign you’ve lost your way; it’s a sign you’re fighting for a life that’s truly yours.

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what is a quarter life crisis
Image Credit: Midjourney

The quarter-life crisis is a well-defined set of stages—Trapped, Checking Out, Separation, Exploration, Rebuilding—one goes through in breaking free from feelings of meaninglessness, lack of fulfillment, and misalignment with purpose. I detail the stages and interweave my story below. (more…)

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Life

Here’s The Thing About Learning, Unlearning, and Relearning

Stop hoarding and start sharing your knowledge and wealth for the benefit of humankind

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sharing your knowledge
Image Credit: Midjourney

Few people have the habit of hoarding their wealth without spending.  However, it limits their motivation as they tend to get into their comfort zones.  When people start spending money, then there will be depletion in their coffers. (more…)

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Life

3 Steps That’ll Help You Take Back Control of Your Life Immediately

The key to finding “enough” is recognizing that the root of the problem is a question of self-esteem and deservedness

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How to build self worth
Image Credit: Midjourney

“It’s never enough.” (more…)

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