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5 Leadership Lessons You Can Learn From Dancing

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You might be the kind of person who’s terrified to dance badly in a crowd of strangers, let alone step out on the dance floor where people can actually see you.

You may be the kind of person who feels they have two (or more!) left feet, or maybe you take to the dance floor like a bird to the air; either way, what you are is a leaderWe’re all leaders. You don’t have to own your own business or be in a position of management – whether it’s working on a project with co-workers, having fun with friends, or helping our own families, we all have opportunities to lead and influence others.

One place that’s crawling with leaders is the dance floor. As a former Salsa instructor, going out for a night of dancing might not seem like a place to learn leadership skills, but with Salsa (and any kind of partner dance), there’s some assigned roles: the Lead and the Follow.

The Leads (traditionally guys) decide what moves to perform, and the Follows (traditionally women) read the movements and go along with it to make it work. First time Leads, are thrown into a leadership role they might not have expected. When you just start out, it’s tough. I never did any dancing as a kid, and getting out there and being responsible for another person can be intimidating.

Whether you dance or not, there’s some leadership lessons to take away from the dance floor and apply it to the rest of your life.

Here are 5 leadership lessons you can learn from dancing:

 

1. Adjust on the fly

Sometimes things don’t go our way. We can try to force it to work, or we can roll with the punches and adjust. In Salsa, if you’re a Lead, this can take the form of doing a move you thought would work and it doesn’t. Maybe you made a mistake, or maybe your dance partner has just never done that kind of move before.

It’s not the end of the world. You can improvise instead, and a move that didn’t work turns into a new one that does.In real life, maybe you have a business plan that doesn’t work exactly the way you want it to, or maybe you’re just trying to get your friends out to a bar and it falls through.

How can you adapt and turn it to your advantage?

“Life is like dancing. If we have a big floor, many people will dance. Some will get angry when the rhythm changes. But life is changing all the time.” – Miguel Angel Ruiz

2. It’s about creating comfort and challenge

Nothing can hurt a relationship more than making people feel awkward and uncomfortable. Make people feel comfortable, and they’ll want to be around you. With Salsa, no one wants to dance with a partner who makes them feel uneasy.

Some people make their partner feel uncomfortable because they’re being creepy and sexually aggressive, or because the moves they’re doing hurt. Others though make their dance partners uncomfortable because they throw moves at them that are way above their level. That creates a huge gap.

The person sees how far it is to the other side, and mentally (or physically) walks away. Too big of a gap and we don’t want to cross it. But if the gap is smaller it becomes a challenge, and they’ll rise up and do their best to leap across. After jumping across lots of small gaps, the huge one won’t seem so big after all.

 

3. It’s about clear communication

You can tell people any message you want, but if it’s unclear it won’t get through to them the way you want it to. In Salsa if the Lead tries a move that isn’t communicated clearly, the Follow may move in an unexpected way, or not at all.

Our bodies communicate more than our words ever can. People may not consciously pay attention to your body, but they still hear what it says. Good Leads make sure their body is saying what they want it to.

If they stand and move with confidence, their partner will feel it and follow smoothly. The Follow will also feel any insecurity, and her steps will be less sure as a result.

 

4. Take the opportunity…If it’s right

Sometimes we take too long thinking about an opportunity and we miss it. If you’re out dancing, you may see someone across the room you want to dance with. Maybe you go for it right away, but maybe you don’t. Maybe you have to think about it.

Maybe you have to work yourself up first, and you have to position yourself to get ahead of everyone else who wants to as well. It’s ok. You can wait until the next song. If it looks like a good opportunity, don’t wait too long, or it might be gone forever. If you do miss the opportunity, don’t sweat it.

There’s never just one. There’s a whole room of opportunities if you take the time to look for them.

“Opportunity dances with those already on the dance floor.” – H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

5. The best leads also follow

The best Leads and Follows know that the roles are fluid. Sometimes your partner does something unexpected; you can either ignore what they did, or you can follow the Follow’s movements and make it into something wonderful.

Learning both roles, the best, know the challenges their partners’ face. Instead of issuing blind commands, they can empathize with them and make win/win decisions rather than win/lose. There’s no shame in learning about a different role other than your own.

If you only have half the picture, you’re missing valuable information. It may be uncomfortable to step outside of what you know, but when you know the whole picture you can Lead that much better.

 

No matter what walk of life you’re in, it’s importance to recognize the influence you have with others. You’re already a leader – it’s time to step up to it.

If you have any leadership skills learned from odd places, let me know in the comments below!

Mark Reagan helps people overcome their fears and anxieties. If you enjoyed this, check out his blog at BreakMyLimits.com and sign up for your free report, “101 Things Holding You Back From Being Your Best Self.”

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Life

How Learning the Skill of Hope Can Change Everything

Hope isn’t wishful thinking. It’s a state of being and a skill that has profound evidence of helping people achieve success in life

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Hope as a skill
Image Credit: Midjourney

Hope isn’t wishful thinking. It’s a state of being and a skill that has profound evidence of helping people achieve success in life.

Wishful thinking, on the other hand, is like having dreams in the sky without a ladder to climb, having a destination without a map, or trying to operate a jet-engine airplane without instructions. It sounds nice but is impossible to realize. You don’t have what you need to make it happen!

What Real Hope Is

Real hope is actionable, practical, and realistic. Better yet, it’s feasible and can be learned.

One popular approach is Hope Theory. This concept is used by colleges to study how hope impacts students’ academic performance. Researchers found that students with high levels of hope achieve better grades and are more likely to graduate compared to those with less hope.

Hope can be broken down into two components:

  1. Pathways – The “how to” of hope. This is where people think of and establish plans for achieving their goals.
  2. Agency – The “I can” of hope. This is the belief that the person can accomplish their goals.

Does Hope Really Work?

According to Webster’s Dictionary, hope as a noun is defined as: “desire accompanied by expectation of or belief in fulfillment.”

As humans, we are wired to crave fulfillment. We have the ability to envision it and, through hope, make it a reality.

My Experience with Hope

For 13 years, I was a hopeless human. During my time working at a luxury hotel as a front desk agent earning $11.42 per hour, I felt the sting of hopelessness the most.

The regret of feeling my time was being stolen from me lingered every time I clocked in. Eventually, I decided to do something about it.

I gave myself permission to hope for something better. I began establishing pathways to success and regained agency by learning from self-help books and seeking mentorship.

Because I took action toward something I desired, I now feel more hope and joy than I ever felt hopelessness. Hope changed me.

Hope Actually Improves Your Life

Wishful thinking doesn’t work, and false hope is equally ineffective. Real hope, however, is directly tied to success in all areas of life.

Studies show that hopeful people tend to:

  • Demonstrate better problem-solving skills
  • Cultivate healthier relationships
  • Maintain stronger motivation to achieve goals
  • Exhibit better work ethic
  • Have a positive outlook on life

These benefits can impact work life, family life, habit-building, mental health, physical health, and spiritual practice. Imagine how much better your life could be by applying real hope to all these areas.

How to Develop the Skill to Hope

As acclaimed French writer Jean Giono wrote in The Man Who Planted Trees:
“There are also times in life when a person has to rush off in pursuit of hopefulness.”

If you are at one of those times, here are ways to develop the skill to hope:

1. Dream Again

To cultivate hope, you need to believe in its possibility. Start by:

  • Reflecting on what you’re passionate about, your values, and what you want to achieve.
  • Writing your dreams down, sharing them with someone encouraging, or saying them out loud.
  • Creating a vision board to make your dreams feel more tangible.

Dreams are the foundation of hope—they give you something meaningful to aspire toward.

2. Create an Environment of Hope

  • Set Goals: Write down your goals and create a plan to achieve them.
  • Visualize Success: Use inspirational quotes, photos, or tools like dumbbells or canvases to remind yourself of your goals.
  • Build a Resource Library: Collect books, eBooks, or audiobooks about hope and success to inspire you.

An environment that fosters hope will keep you motivated, resilient, and focused.

3. Face the Challenges

Don’t avoid challenges—overcoming them builds confidence. Participating in challenging activities, like strategic games, can enhance your problem-solving skills and reinforce hope.

4. Commit to Wisdom

Seek wisdom from those who have achieved what you aspire to. Whether through books, blogs, or social media platforms, learn from their journeys. Wisdom provides the foundation for real, actionable hope.

5. Take Note of Small Wins

Reflecting on past victories can fuel your hope for the future. Ask yourself:

  • What challenges have I already overcome?
  • How did I feel when I succeeded?

By remembering those feelings of happiness, relief, or satisfaction, your brain will naturally adopt a more hopeful mindset.

Conclusion

Hope is more than wishful thinking—it’s a powerful skill that can transform your life. By dreaming again, creating a hopeful environment, facing challenges, seeking wisdom, and celebrating small wins, you can develop the real hope necessary for success in all aspects of life.

Let hope guide you toward a brighter, more fulfilling future.

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Life

The 5 Stages of a Quarter-Life Crisis & What You Can Do

A quarter-life crisis isn’t a sign you’ve lost your way; it’s a sign you’re fighting for a life that’s truly yours.

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what is a quarter life crisis
Image Credit: Midjourney

The quarter-life crisis is a well-defined set of stages—Trapped, Checking Out, Separation, Exploration, Rebuilding—one goes through in breaking free from feelings of meaninglessness, lack of fulfillment, and misalignment with purpose. I detail the stages and interweave my story below. (more…)

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Life

Here’s The Thing About Learning, Unlearning, and Relearning

Stop hoarding and start sharing your knowledge and wealth for the benefit of humankind

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sharing your knowledge
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Few people have the habit of hoarding their wealth without spending.  However, it limits their motivation as they tend to get into their comfort zones.  When people start spending money, then there will be depletion in their coffers. (more…)

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Life

3 Steps That’ll Help You Take Back Control of Your Life Immediately

The key to finding “enough” is recognizing that the root of the problem is a question of self-esteem and deservedness

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How to build self worth
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“It’s never enough.” (more…)

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