Success Advice
Being Criticised & Mocked Hurts Badly — Get Used To It If You Want To Be Successful.

Last week was hell! I have to make a very big career decision right now, I have to go to hospital next week and to top it off I opened my email to find a note from a friend showing a piece of content that was featured all over the internet that mocked me and criticised me.
Just when I thought I couldn’t handle any more stress, more stress came knocking at my door.
What happened?
A piece of content was created around me and my work. It was highly unfavorable, or so I thought initially. My first reaction was anger and hurt. I knew the internet could be a harsh environment, but this was bigger than anything I’d gone through before.
A comment is one thing but a piece of content from a well-known person of influence is far more challenging to get my head around.
When I’m heavily criticised what do I do?
I don’t stand still. First of all, I sleep on it.
The moment I saw the content that had my name in it I was upset, angry, tired and frustrated. I knew this was the worst mood for making rational decisions. I went to sleep as soon as I could although I didn’t sleep well.
I woke up the next day and tracked down the content creator who’d spoken about my work. They answered my phone call and I started out by asking about where they were from. I told them where I was from and a bit about me.
I dropped the question politely like this: “Hey I saw this post about me. I’d love to hear more about it from your perspective.”
Then I shut up and stopped talking.
Allow the silence to take over if need be – just shut up and wait for a response.
He explained to me what happened and a bit about the post.
It turned out I was wrong.
The post named me but it didn’t actually state a final viewpoint on my work. That was left up to the reader which I’d stupidly misunderstood in my rage and anger.
We then kept chatting and I got to see that this was a very kind, nice and humble man. My irrational thoughts that told me he was an asshole were wrong – surprise, surprise!
He came from a place I wanted to visit, he had similar influences as me and even had a trip organized in the future to come to Australia.
“I did the only thing that felt right in that moment: I told him he could stay at my place and I meant it”
I then explained to him a bit about why I do what I do and the fact that it’s not about celebrity status, proving other people wrong, followers or my ego: It’s about helping people.
I told him the stories of suicidal readers who’d reached out to me and how I helped them. I shared my current thinking which is that doing the right thing is always the right thing.
By the end, we’d both gone from adversaries to understanding each other. I’d like to think there was a genuine connection and we thought very much the same – maybe I’m getting ahead of myself to go that far – nonetheless, it felt good.
I hung up the phone and vowed to keep in touch with him and I will.
It’s always best to talk it through.
The worst thing you can do in this situation is fire off emails, get your influencer friends together, start hostile hip hop wars, send legal letters, complain like a sook and think you’re the king of the hill.
“All of us are human. We all do dumb sh*t and we all make mistakes – even so-called self-help bloggers like me (I cringe at that title by the way)”
The best thing to do is talk it out over the phone and let your critic go first. Don’t interrupt them and don’t turn it into an argument fuelled by your ego and the need to be right. Listen.
People will support you in these moments.
What surprised me is that when this content speaking out against my work was released, friends I’d met through the internet (not in person) began reaching out to help. I felt so lost and these friends helped me.
One of them had gone through the exact same situation and I quickly saw that my problem was not unique. All of our problems are the same few flavors. He gave me great advice and I followed it. I thought to myself “If he can come out of it alive and with his dignity still intact then so can I.”
Always lead with kindness and show compassion.
That’s the superpower you need to deal with hurtful content that may be created about you online. Show compassion to the person that speaks out against you and try to see things from their perspective. Lead with kindness and watch your tone of voice.
It’s easy to get pissed off. It’s much harder to remain silent or calm.
You’re going to be criticised, mocked and encounter haters if you want to be successful.
This was the advice I gave to my friend who in the same week had the video he shot in his car, ripped to pieces by haters online. Instead of focusing on the points he was trying to get across in the video, his LinkedIn connections hurled abuse at him for driving while filming and for wearing sunglasses.
I told him that to be successful (especially online or as a blogger) you have to embrace criticism, haters and trolls. Funnily enough, the same applied to my mini-nightmare that I’d gone through that same week. I told him this:
“Never stop being you for any reason no matter how much people don’t like it.”
I also had to swallow this same advice when my moment in the spotlight of criticism came.
Everyone will not like everything you do. The need to build followers and have people like your work on social media has become this out of control dopamine drug that we all chase to the ends of the Earth whether we admit it or not.
Everyone is not supposed to hail you and worship you like a god. You’re not invincible, you will fall and you will be mocked. The question is will you get back up again and keep going? In my case, that’s exactly what I’m going to do.
That’s because success cannot be achieved through perfection.
If you want to increase your productivity and learn some more valuable life hacks, then join my private mailing list on timdenning.net
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The Leadership Shift Every Company Needs in 2025
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In workplaces around the world, there’s a growing gap between employers and employees and between superiors and their teams. It’s a common refrain: “People don’t leave companies, they leave bad bosses.”
While there are, of course, cases where management could do better, this isn’t just a “bad boss” problem. The relationship between leaders and employees is complex. Instead of assigning blame, we should explore practical solutions to build stronger, healthier workplaces where everyone thrives.
Why This Gap Exists
Every workplace needs someone to guide, supervise, and provide feedback. That’s essential for productivity and performance. But because there are usually far more employees than managers, dissatisfaction, fair or not, spreads quickly.
What if, instead of focusing on blame, we focused on building trust, empathy, and communication? This is where modern leadership and human-centered management can make a difference.
Tools and Techniques to Bridge the Gap
Here are proven strategies leaders and employees can use to foster stronger relationships and create a workplace where people actually want to stay.
1. Practice Mutual Empathy
Both managers and employees need to recognize they are ultimately on the same team. Leaders have to balance people and performance, and often face intense pressure to hit targets. Employees who understand this reality are more likely to cooperate and problem-solve collaboratively.
2. Maintain Professional Boundaries
Superiors should separate personal issues from professional decision-making. Consistency, fairness, and integrity build trust, and trust is the foundation of a motivated team.
3. Follow the Golden Rule
Treat people how you would like to be treated. This simple principle encourages compassion and respect, two qualities every effective leader must demonstrate.
4. Avoid Micromanagement
Micromanaging stifles creativity and damages morale. Great leaders see themselves as partners, not just bosses, and treat their teams as collaborators working toward a shared goal.
5. Empower Employees to Grow
Empowerment means giving employees responsibility that matches their capacity, and then trusting them to deliver. Encourage them to take calculated risks, learn from mistakes, and problem-solve independently. If something goes wrong, turn it into a learning opportunity, not a reprimand.
6. Communicate in All Directions
Communication shouldn’t just be top-down. Invite feedback, create open channels for suggestions, and genuinely listen to what your people have to say. Healthy upward communication closes gaps before they become conflicts.
7. Overcome Insecurities
Many leaders secretly fear being outshone by younger, more tech-savvy employees. Instead of resisting, embrace the chance to learn from them. Humility earns respect and helps the team innovate faster.
8. Invest in Coaching and Mentorship
True leaders grow other leaders. Provide mentorship, career guidance, and stretch opportunities so employees can develop new skills. Leadership is learned through experience, but guided experience is even more powerful.
9. Eliminate Favoritism
Avoid cliques and office politics. Decisions should be based on facts and fairness, not gossip. Objective, transparent decision-making builds credibility.
10. Recognize Efforts Promptly
Recognition often matters more than rewards. Publicly appreciate employees’ contributions and do so consistently and fairly. A timely “thank you” can be more motivating than a quarterly bonus.
11. Conduct Thoughtful Exit Interviews
When employees leave, treat it as an opportunity to learn. Keep interviews confidential and use the insights to improve management practices and culture.
12. Provide Leadership Development
Train managers to lead, not just supervise. Leadership development programs help shift mindsets from “command and control” to “coach and empower.” This transformation has a direct impact on morale and retention.
13. Adopt Soft Leadership Principles
Today’s workforce, largely millennials and Gen Z, value collaboration over hierarchy. Soft leadership focuses on partnership, mutual respect, and shared purpose, rather than rigid top-down control.
The Bigger Picture: HR’s Role
Mercer’s global research highlights five key priorities for organizations:
-
Build diverse talent pipelines
-
Embrace flexible work models
-
Design compelling career paths
-
Simplify HR processes
-
Redefine the value HR brings
The challenge? Employers and employees often view these priorities differently. Bridging that perception gap is just as important as bridging the relational gap between leaders and staff.
Treat Employees Like Associates, Not Just Staff
When you treat employees like partners, they bring their best selves to work. HR leaders must develop strategies to keep talent engaged, empowered, and prepared for the future.
Organizational success starts with people, always. Build the relationship with your team first, and the results will follow.
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Back in July 2017, I attended a business seminar on entrepreneurship in India. With my appetite for learning and meeting new people, I wanted to explore the latest developments in the entrepreneurial world. (more…)
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