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Success Advice

12 Signs That You Need to Grow Up and Stop Ruining Your Opportunities for Success

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Quite often in my profession, I encounter a grown child. It’s typically a person who thinks and behaves like they never matured past junior high. It’s a sad reality, because as I process through strategies for them to achieve personal success, the recurring theme is simple: if they can’t shake off the attitudes, behaviors, and beliefs of childhood, they cannot succeed.

If you want to know if you’re still acting like a child and that is the reason you cannot achieve the maximum levels of success then read below:

1. You believe popularity is more important than integrity

Popularity is child’s play, but so many adults treat social status as a key to personal validity. In the process, they often sacrifice honesty, loyalty, and basic manners. The moment you place a value on popularity, you’ve distanced yourself from success. Popularity can get you more likes on social media, but it won’t bring you success. If you want to be validated, be known for having integrity. Like it or not, people will respect you and you will attract success.

2. You act like you know everything

The older I become, the more I realize I have so much more to learn. That’s the way it should be, but if you find yourself feeling like you already know enough, you’re stagnant or dying, because at this point, growth becomes impossible meaning success becomes impossible.

The average CEO reads over 50 books per year, and that’s only one piece of knowledge ingestion. If you want to be successful, recognize you don’t know enough, and never stop learning.

3. You would rather nap than work

There’s a Proverb that says, “if a man doesn’t work, he shouldn’t eat.” Hard work brings about success, but avoiding the work will hamper your ability to achieve. If you want to continue an upward track, embrace everything it takes to get there. Work now, rest later.

4. You don’t respect authority

We’re not talking about respecting abusive authority, but when it comes to achieving your goals, you need to understand that how you treat those in authority over you has a significant impact on your future. Children may be insolent, but winners show respect.

5. You excuse all your mistakes

Mistakes and failures are an inevitable part of your journey towards success. While excusing your mistakes might have seemed like a good idea when you were 12, doing so as an adult prevents you from learning and growing.

“Mistakes are always forgivable, if one has the courage to admit them.” – Bruce Lee

6. You are arrogant

Most successful people in life will tell you that humility is a requisite attitude. Arrogance, after all, usually precedes some form of stupidity. Arrogance may have scored the prom king his throne, but it won’t give you the upper hand in real life. If you want to succeed, lose the attitude.

7. You don’t listen

As a kid, I remember my mom telling me not to ride my bike without a helmet, and my first boss telling me not to mix chemicals when I was cleaning the equipment. I ignored both of them, and suffered the consequences. As an adult, if you don’t listen, people notice. Ignoring others may not put you in the hospital, but it will send a message that you don’t value them, and value is a two-way street.

8. You blame

Blaming your siblings or classmates may have helped you avoid discipline as a child, but when it comes to being an adult, personal responsibility is a key to growth. Don’t pass the blame, but instead look for ways you can take responsibility for your own actions. Personal responsibility is a hallmark of leadership.

9. You can’t admit being afraid

If you’re not a little afraid each day, you’re not pushing yourself far enough. Success requires that you step outside of the humdrum of routine and push yourself to the edge. The drop off, however, is scary, so don’t hesitate to admit your fear. When you identify it, you can master it.

10. You think you can do it on your own

Very few well-known leaders believe they have achieved success alone. Even fewer people actually achieve success going solo. If you want to reach the furthest limits of success, learn the value of teams – mentors, supporters, and everyone in between. They say it takes a village to raise a child, but when it comes to opportunity, a “village” can get you further than you can do yourself.

11. You can’t work well with others

The arrogance and autonomy of immaturity often impedes our ability to effectively participate in teams. Yet, aside from helping push us further, teamwork highlights our strengths and weaknesses. If you can’t work well with others, it shows the world you’re insecure, and when you’re insecure, success avoids you like the plague.

“Talent wins games, but teamwork and intelligence win championships.” Michael Jordan

12. You alienate those not like you

I was an athlete and a skater in high school. The two groups would not mix, but I was content to spend time with both groups without feeling ousted by either. Group dynamics for jocks, nerds, headbangers, and goths may work well when you’re a kid because they help establish identity and social norms.

As an adult, they can undermine your ability to succeed. More importantly, when you alienate those who are not like you, you send a clear message that you have no value for them. Successful people show value for others; losers alienate them.

You have a shot to be all that you were meant to be, but you can’t get to new places using old tools. Let go of the childhood antics and step into success today.

What is the hardest thing about being an adult for you? Please comment below and et us know!

Brock Shinen has been guiding entrepreneurs, business owners, executives, and creators for more than 13 years as an attorney, trainer, and strategic advisor. His passion is to see people and businesses transform by implementing smart, adaptable thinking leading towards economic and personal success. He is also the author of the Amazon #1 Bestseller, “Crush The Stops: An Entrepreneur’s Guide to Finishing Things.” You can also visit his website.

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Why This Gap Exists

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What if, instead of focusing on blame, we focused on building trust, empathy, and communication? This is where modern leadership and human-centered management can make a difference.

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1. Practice Mutual Empathy

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2. Maintain Professional Boundaries

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3. Follow the Golden Rule

Treat people how you would like to be treated. This simple principle encourages compassion and respect, two qualities every effective leader must demonstrate.

4. Avoid Micromanagement

Micromanaging stifles creativity and damages morale. Great leaders see themselves as partners, not just bosses, and treat their teams as collaborators working toward a shared goal.

5. Empower Employees to Grow

Empowerment means giving employees responsibility that matches their capacity, and then trusting them to deliver. Encourage them to take calculated risks, learn from mistakes, and problem-solve independently. If something goes wrong, turn it into a learning opportunity, not a reprimand.

6. Communicate in All Directions

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7. Overcome Insecurities

Many leaders secretly fear being outshone by younger, more tech-savvy employees. Instead of resisting, embrace the chance to learn from them. Humility earns respect and helps the team innovate faster.

8. Invest in Coaching and Mentorship

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9. Eliminate Favoritism

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10. Recognize Efforts Promptly

Recognition often matters more than rewards. Publicly appreciate employees’ contributions and do so consistently and fairly. A timely “thank you” can be more motivating than a quarterly bonus.

11. Conduct Thoughtful Exit Interviews

When employees leave, treat it as an opportunity to learn. Keep interviews confidential and use the insights to improve management practices and culture.

12. Provide Leadership Development

Train managers to lead, not just supervise. Leadership development programs help shift mindsets from “command and control” to “coach and empower.” This transformation has a direct impact on morale and retention.

13. Adopt Soft Leadership Principles

Today’s workforce, largely millennials and Gen Z, value collaboration over hierarchy. Soft leadership focuses on partnership, mutual respect, and shared purpose, rather than rigid top-down control.

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  • Design compelling career paths

  • Simplify HR processes

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Treat Employees Like Associates, Not Just Staff

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Organizational success starts with people, always. Build the relationship with your team first, and the results will follow.

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