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10 Ways To Flip Your Current Reality Upside Down Just Like I Did

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Reality Flipped Upside Down - Gamification

If your current reality is not something that excites you, then it is completely possible to flip it upside down and turn it into the most positive reality you could possibly imagine.

It’s easy to think that changing your reality is difficult, but I have learned that it really just takes one small change. One small thing could be the trigger point for your current reality to be flipped upside down assuming that you are receptive to such small triggers.

Why settle for a reality that doesn’t align with your vision or dream? You don’t have to. Never allow yourself to be disappointed with where you’re heading and don’t settle for less than you can be. Decide that you are going to be passionate about what you do and do something life-changing.

As you’ve heard me say many times before, you only get one crack at life, and you shouldn’t waste a single minute not being happy with your reality. It’s time to rise up!

Below are ten ways you can flip your current reality.

 

1. Decide to make a change

The first step is to do some self-reflection and ultimately decide that change is a must for you and your current reality will no longer suffice. Making a change is simple, deciding that change is a must and committing to it is the hard part.

To gain leverage on yourself and be able to come to the decision that you will no longer settle for your current reality takes guts. All of you have it in you, but only some of you have the willpower to crush your fears right now and battle your reality head on.

It’s okay if you’re not ready, but just don’t wait forever to decide that change is a must. Deciding to make the change is a matter of writing down the reasons why you have to change right now. It’s also about writing down why not making the changes is painful to you.

Pain will drive you more than anything so use it to your advantage, commit to change, accept there will be failure, stand up straight, and tackle your current reality head on! You can do it, and it’s what you have waited your entire life to do.

The time is now, and this article is going to be the seed of your new reality.

 

2. Change one belief

Don’t let yourself fall into the illusion of thinking that you need to change all of your beliefs overnight in order to flip your reality. Changing your reality requires small changes that are implemented over time.

For me, I only had to change one small belief to start with, which then led me to change my entire reality. So you’re probably asking yourself, “Tim what was that one belief you changed?” Simple, I created a new belief that says, “anything is possible!”

To this day, this belief still drives everything I do, and I go into every situation with a sense of certainty that anything is possible. A sense that one small thing like writing this article could lead to the most amazing event of my life that I could never have dreamed of.

I go into every situation believing that no matter how hard the task is, I can achieve greatness and overcome adversity. If you change one belief to start with, and it’s a big one like mine, you may find that you don’t even need to change any other beliefs for quite some time.

I would recommend, though, eventually doing away with your disempowering beliefs. They won’t serve you and they become a barrier to the current reality you are creating.

 

3. Become Aware

Humans have a habit of just walking around completely oblivious to the current moment and not aware what’s going on. When you begin to become aware of what you are doing each day and analyse your actions with a degree of non-judgement, you start to see your reality in a whole new way.

The best way to become aware is to either meditate or my favourite, start blogging / journaling. Through writing down your thoughts every day, you start to see with clarity what you repeatedly do. After a while, it’s then possible to make some decisions about how you want to change things.

To supercharge the writing down of your thoughts, the next best thing you can do is to share it through a talk or speech. When you begin telling others your thoughts, you get the chance to seek feedback and confirm that what you are thinking is what needs to change.

 

4. Understand your connection to the universe

Recently I have been watching lots of documentaries that prove without a shadow of a doubt that everything in our universe is connected. Just like the internet, our need for connection is engrained deep inside of us. It’s this need that is deep within our DNA and causes us to use social media.

Without going all hippy, the basic concept is quite simple; what you put out into the world comes straight back at you. If you want to change your reality, then you need to start putting things out into the universe that are positive.

You have the ability to attract negative and positive things into your life through the energy you create. So how I use this practically in my life is that when I am in the zone to do something that will have a negative effect, I stop for a minute, think, and have the default response of not going through with it.

In practice, a simple example would be the decision to yell at a fellow motorist if they cut me off. Rather than reaching for the horn like I used to, my default response is to do nothing and believe that the other person must have cut me off by mistake, or maybe to believe that they had a very good reason that I was not aware of.

Over time, I have expanded this scenario out to loads more real life examples such as; losing something, bad customer service, loud noises from other people, negative feedback about me, etc. If you want to turn your reality around then, it’s time to understand your connection with the universe and change your default answer of negative events to a non-reactive state.

 

5. Start with one kind act per day

To flip your current reality around you need to continuously do the same for other people through kind acts. The reason for this is that what you do for others is what will show up in your own life. Like all of the above examples, start small and then add a new kind act every few days.

I started this practice a few weeks ago with one simple act, which was opening doors for other people. I then added letting people in front of me while ordering food. Followed by this Saturday where I asked one homeless person if he was cold and offered to buy him a hot cup of tea or coffee.

I noticed after each kind act that another kind act would come back to me, or I would learn, or feel something new each time. As I did each act, I thought to myself, what if everyone just went and brought one other person a drink or piece of food each day?

What would that one kind act do? I think it’s pretty obvious: it would eliminate most of the issues we have in our society today. The reason for this is that it would change the way we treat each other. It would make us rethink about violence and point us in the direction of kindness.

One kind act of kindness can completely change your reality if you make it a must to do one each day.

 

6. Become a connector

The behaviour that will transform your reality the quickest is to become a connector. By connector, I simply mean the art of connecting people with other people. Every self-development test I have ever done has told me that my number one trait is connecting people.

As I began to use this trait more and more, I found my current reality change significantly. All I did was attempt to connect like-minded people as much as possible. This doesn’t mean you connect everyone to anyone; it just means that you become a matchmaker.

It’s not hard to do and involves looking for common themes amongst people. Connect writers with each other, connect people that share the same hobby, connect a sick person to a great medical person. This one act has seen loads of nice things come back my way.

The key is that when loads of nice things come back your way because of the connecting you are doing, give at least 50% of those nice things back out to your network. This will compound your results further and really transform your reality.

A practical example might be that you connect two people together and as thanks, you get given tickets to an event. Instead of going to that event yourself, consider who would enjoy that event even more than you. Imagine you got tickets to the football, think about who in your network is a crazy football fan and give it to them instead.

Again, connecting will change your reality three hundred and sixty degrees just the way it did for me.

 

7. Clear your head

Our head can be a real place of noise, but it’s also where we create our reality. Flipping your reality requires you to clear your head first, and there are a few ways to do this. For me, I find that a holiday to somewhere that has a beautiful natural environment is the best way.

Leave your phone and computer behind and just enjoy some fresh air and scenery for a few days. If you are looking for an easier way to clear your head without having to venture too far away then a hard workout at the gym or watching a really emotive movie like the Pursuit Of Happyness is a great way to clear your head.

When your mind is clear from all the noise of your job or business, it’s much easier to work towards changing your reality. Any change requires you to have some level of deep thought and for many of us, this is just not possible a lot of the time.

It’s good to work out a time when your mind is most clear. The weekend, for me, seems to be the best time to engage in a deeper level of thought. Changing my reality involved me trying very hard to understand what makes me happy.

Once I was clear about my happiness triggers, I then worked towards creating my new reality and documenting it on my laptop. Even if you are not 100% clear yet about what your new reality should be just write something down. Perfection is not the answer; the answer is action.

 

8. Absorb some new information

References help shape your reality in a big way. To be able to get yourself to believe that a new reality is possible and to dream one up, you need to absorb some new information. The best kind of new information I’ve consumed is documentaries or movies based around people who achieved factual, incredible and difficult tasks against all odds.

It’s also good to absorb new information by meeting some new people. When you meet someone new, and they start to fill you with positive information about things they have done in their life, you can begin to pull different aspects into your own life.

Changing Your Current Reality Quote
 

9. Adopt one new idea

Ideas these days are a dime a dozen. Everyone has one, and they are taken for granted. As silly as it sounds, one new idea can completely change your reality. The idea that flipped my current reality was the idea that giving back through blogging could open up opportunities.

It’s easy to believe that when you blog your articles are not meaningful or have no effect. And for me, that might be true, but what the blogging has done to change my reality is that it has created a perception of me to others which directly aligns with my dream reality.

Blogging has forced me to live by what I write each day and hold myself accountable to greatness. It motivates me to get up each day and to create some sort of legacy in the limited time that all of us humans have.

The articles I’ve written have formed a basis for how I want to shape my reality going forward. It has given me a platform to have a voice and achieve my ultimate purpose of inspiring the world. When the idea of blogging was presented to me, it would have been easy to ignore it and think that it was a waste of time.

Instead, I committed to trying it and finding a way to use it no matter what. When a new idea is presented to you, it can only flip your reality if you are able to dream big enough that the idea you have been given can be something so much more.

This idea can only be an instigator of your success if you commit to it 100% and spend every day working on it. Over time, the idea might completely change, but the original idea will be the trigger point for the eventual outcome.

“Your reality is shaped by the ideas you experiment with and commit to today”

 

10. Create one new habit

The final empowering tool you need in your toolbox is the seed of just one new habit. As with the idea concept mentioned previously, a new habit will give you something to work on each day that is directly aligned with your future reality.

The habit I decided to practice when I flipped my own reality was to have more energy. While this might seem like a pretty random habit that is very broad, it eventually led into multiple other habits that form the basis of my current daily routine.

When you change just one habit, your mind commits to shaping your reality just a little bit differently to the previous day. Don’t make the mistake of trying to change lots of habits all at once otherwise, you will overwhelm yourself entirely.

Flipping your reality is all about the small steps you take every day to improve your situation. If we diagnose what small steps are, they are really two things; the daily action we take and the habits that we have. Change just one habit and you will definitely flip your reality upside down.

How have you flipped your own reality? Let me know in the comments section below or on my Facebook or Twitter pages.

Tim is best known as a long-time contributor on Addicted2Success. Tim's content has been shared millions of times and he has written multiple viral posts all around personal development and entrepreneurship. You can connect with Tim through his website www.timdenning.net

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4 Comments

4 Comments

  1. Toño

    Mar 12, 2016 at 4:42 am

    This is the highest compliment I’ve ever received, Tim, I appreciate it very much. Your support and connection means a lot, I feel how I started to believe in myself more, even though still so much work and things to learn to actually master my mind and improve my life.

    Happy Saturday for you and everyone around (it may be already evening for, but still), thank you so much for inspiring the world and following your calling. If I somehow can give something back to you or help with anything, please let me know.

    • Tim Denning

      Mar 12, 2016 at 8:18 am

      Thanks Toño. Connect with me on Twitter or Facebook so I can stay in touch.

  2. Toño

    Mar 10, 2016 at 6:46 pm

    It was a slow day at work that turned into non-pleasant event. I reacted exactly the same, feeling how negativity got deep down as it was a poison.. For about 5 minutes I kept thinking about it, focusing on what happened, ready to judge and become frustrated. Then I just told myself to stop and reached out to my computer where already was an open tab with addcited2success. I printed a fresh copy of your latest article and dived deep into it. Reading calmed down my wandering mind and I’ve found advice I was so grateful to get, right on time when I was asking for it.

    Understand your connection to the Universe. Change your response from negative into default one. Just do the switch. I was so obsessed with that event that turned myself into negative state of mind. What I put out into the world get straight back at me. For the whole day I was thinking that negative way and got exactly what I was ‘asking’ for..

    I have changed my thoughts immediately and after just few minutes started feel better. Amzaing! Simple thing I actually quite aware of, but still, for some reason, leave behind so often. You basically saved my evening, Tim, as I’ve spent the rest of my work hours in a good mood and got home in a chilled state of mind. How grateful I am for everything you’ve done, and you still full of surprises, fresh ideas and never-ending energy! Keep on going, my friend and thank you so very much 🙂

    The whole article is powerful, I already read it twice and left a copy on my desk for my co-workers.

    • Tim Denning

      Mar 11, 2016 at 11:59 pm

      Toño you are starting to master your mind better than anyone I know. I have shared your thank you note with my Facebook friends. All of us have these days, but it’s how you come back from the low’s that counts.

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Success Advice

Success is for the Self-Taught

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Truman Capote, Jimi Hendrix, Steve Jobs, Nikola Tesla. Those are four names you never thought you’d see in a sentence together. As it happens, these four individuals have more in common than their success, ingenuity, and fame. They were all autodidacts. In other words, they were self-taught learners.

The talents and innovations that skyrocketed them to fame were the products of their own teachings. Make no mistake, this doesn’t mean a formal education is a waste of time. However, it goes to show that success is crafted solely by commitment and focus. While college and traineeships can prepare us for the groundwork of what we pursue, it’s ultimately up to us as individuals to teach ourselves how to refine our knowledge for success.

It’s the self-taught principles that allow us to distinguish our own work from that of others. With the help of the internet, self-taught success is more possible than ever. And there are plenty of ways to reach our inner autodidact.

Elon Musk had science degrees from top Ivy League universities, but he still credits most of his knowledge to the textbooks he allegedly “committed to memory.” Reading is just one way to teach yourself everything you need to know. Aspiring inventors can surely learn a lot by sacrificing some of their leisure time to sit down with a textbook.

For writers and artists, the best study is to just read. Read anything. Inspiration can be derived from poetry, works of fiction, etc. These also help you develop your writing skills, which is an important asset for any aspiring entrepreneur.

“Self-education is, I firmly believe, the only kind of education there is.” – Isaac Asimov

With the help of online Master Classes, Youtube videos, and apps – where online courses developed by some of the top U.S. educational institutions can be accessed remotely – self-taught success is more attainable than ever.

What’s more, we learn through practice. We can publish our own eBooks through Amazon without the publishing house bureaucracy. We can advertise our product, brand, or service through social media savvy without astronomical advertising costs. And as we practice, we learn. We gain feedback from our followers, learn from our mistakes, and do it better the second time around.

Even when you’re teaching yourself, others are always helping. However, you get to decide which lessons are most constructive, and you get to apply them to the real world in real-time.

The Science of Self-Taught

People have a tendency to romanticize the concept of self-taught success. It’s not a solution for laziness, or an excuse for lack of motivation. In many cases, teaching yourself is more work than being taught. The level of accountability rises when you are both teacher and student. Furthermore, it requires more discipline. Without a structured schedule or a guaranteed reward at the end of your efforts, your only hope is your dedication.

Beyond this, however, the only thing stopping most people from teaching themselves is insecurity. Fear of failure and inadequacy halts self-taught learners in their tracks. Especially because with self-teaching, inevitably, comes occasional failure. Unfortunately, the self-taught often feel they have nobody to blame the failure on but themselves – no teachers, mentors, or trainers as scapegoats.

According to Psychology Today, there is nothing that makes certain people better self-taught learners than others. The only difference is motivation, and willingness to overcome that lingering insecurity. Even the concept of “learning styles” is erroneous, says Psychology Today. While each individual is different, ability to learn is not based on preference, but expertise.

Beginners learn better from examples, while experts learn better by solving problems. This builds yet another case for autodidacts, who are more likely to learn by experience – the most effective method.

“Wisdom is not a product of schooling but a lifelong attempt to acquire it.” – Albert Einstein

The Rewards of Being Self-Taught

The fruits of your labor taste sweeter when you’ve taught yourself how to grow them. As such, success is more enjoyable when your self-education has contributed to it. All successful individuals have something in common: they’ve taken the initiative to teach themselves new things, or to supplement their formal education with self-teaching, as well.

Therefore, not all groundbreaking inventors, artists, and philosophers are solely self-taught. However, they’ve still accompanied their college training with their own individual quest for knowledge.

There is a simple reason why autodidacts thrive the most: because they’re always learning. The one mistake people who solely rely on formal education and training make is the mistake of stopping their learning process altogether once it’s over. Not only does this prevent you from being up-to-date on the latest concepts and advancements in your field, but it obstructs your brain’s thirst for mental stimulation.

By constantly learning and teaching ourselves new things, no matter how small or large they might be, we could change the course of our overall health and well-being. Research even shows that mental stimulation (consisting of practicing memorization, learning new things, and improving our skill in existing hobbies) is key to slowing down the development of, and possibly even reversing, Alzheimer’s and dementia.

Motivational speaker and entrepreneur Jim Rohn was noted for saying, “Formal education will make you a living; self-education will make you a fortune.” This does not mean you should abandon the pursuit of formal education, as it often serves as the foundation for self-education. But, it does mean we should maintain, cater to, and quench our thirst for knowledge as much as we possibly can.

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Success Advice

6 Expert Tips for Building Relationships With Those You Idolize

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Many of us dream of one day meeting a celebrity. Be it a movie star or a pro football player, we have a tendency to idolize these individuals, even looking to them for guidance as we make life decisions. In business, we can also find people we idolize. Individuals who have achieved great success with their own company or even revolutionized an industry.

From these people, we can learn key skills, gain valuable insights or even form partnerships to take our own business ventures to the next level. Yes, it is possible to form real relationships with your business idols or industry influencers. But like any other relationship, it requires work.

Here’s 6 ways you can start forming the relationships that will make a lasting difference for your entrepreneurial goals:

1. Do Your Research

Facebook stalking may be creepy for normal relationships, but doing some online research is perfectly okay for business leaders and influencers. After all, most influencers are extremely active online, either through social media, their own website or guest blogging. This basic research gives you a chance to better understand your business idol.

What do they like or dislike? What are their opinions on current trends? What do they talk like? These simple bits of information will help you better know how to approach them and determine if a relationship could prove beneficial.

“The richest people in the world look for and build networks. Everyone else looks for work.” – Robert Kiyosaki

2. Comment Carefully

Your initial research also serves as your first chance for engagement with your business idol. By liking social media posts or leaving thoughtful comments on blog articles, you can make a positive first impression.

Of course, leaving quality comments is sometimes easier said than done. As Kevin Duncan of SmartBlogger explains, thoughtfully contributing to the discussion with personal experiences or meaningful questions are a great way to get the conversation started.

“When you share a personal insight, bloggers can more easily relate to you. You’re no longer just an unfamiliar name making a comment that could have been left by anyone …the more personal your insight, the more unique it will be. And the more unique your insight, the more memorable your comment will be and the more you’ll stand out.”

3. Group Participation

Business leaders and influencers won’t only be found on blogs. Many are also active participants in online industry groups. Whether on Facebook or LinkedIn, these groups allow industry professionals to discuss current trends, ask for advice, or share new opportunities.

If you wish to make a positive impression, you should seek out, join and actively participate in these online groups. Avoid the temptation to promote yourself or your business. Instead, engage in conversations much like you would with a quality blog comment. By sharing your unique experiences and insights, you’ll build a stronger reputation among your peers.

4. Face Time

Online discussions are a great place to start, but the best relationships typically require some face-to-face interaction. You make a much more lasting impression when you have an in-person conversation. Industry conventions or lectures are great places to connect with others in your field. When you show yourself as a living, breathing human being, rather than just a name behind the computer, it becomes so much easier to make a personal connection and form a real, lasting relationship — and that can pay big dividends for future pitches.

Setting up a face-to-face meeting can be tricky. After all, you don’t want to come off as creepy. However, if you’ve already established an online rapport, asking if an influencer would like to briefly meet in person at an event you’re both attending shouldn’t be a problem.

5. Add Value

All relationships have a bit of give and take — and this is especially true when forming relationships in the business world. If you’re only approaching a business idol because you hope to gain something (like an extra investor in your startup), you likely won’t have success. Instead, find ways that you can contribute value.

As leadership consultant Randy Hain explains, “‘What can I do to help you?’ is absolutely one of the best ways to get business relationships off to a great start. Invest in the other person first, with no expectation of return. Do not keep score. Simply make the investment and over time you will benefit from the seeds of generosity you have planted.”

“Networking is the No. 1 unwritten rule of success in business.” – Sallie Krawcheck

6. Focus On the Long-Term

The aforementioned tactics aren’t “one and done” tips. Instead, you’ll need to continually practice them to show your genuine interest and build the kinds of friendships that can pay lasting dividends for everyone involved.

Relationships aren’t a short-term investment — and this is especially true if you want help on your own road to success. Real relationships need time to grow. They need continual nurturing. With a patient, long-term approach, you’ll be less tempted to jump right into a sales pitch and more likely to focus on a genuine friendship that delivers a real payoff.

Becoming an entrepreneur may put you in the role of the underdog — but this doesn’t mean you have to go at it alone. As you form genuine relationships with influencers and other business professionals, you’ll gain access to new sources of knowledge.

You’ll find friends who are willing to help or mentors willing to share their time. You may even find a new business partner. Relationship-building is a lifelong endeavor, but it will always pay off in the end.

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Stop Denying Your Negative Thoughts and Start Embracing Them

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Over the years, many of the talking heads and pundits in the personal development and success science industry have talked about the immediate replacement of negative thoughts with positive thoughts. The logic behind that particular behavioral strategy seems to make sense on the surface. Think about it, when a negative thought rears its ugly head, we should immediately dive into the repository of positive thoughts that we have available to us so that we could immediately begin to dwell on it.

Even further, some gurus of the genre suggest removing any chance of having a negative thought by the constant repetition of affirmations. Again, tried-and-true motivational technology that is very workable and still useful. I would suggest, however, that you view the above behaviors as tactics more than strategies.

I will further suggest to you that you do not abhor your negative thoughts but rather embrace them, examine them, and place them under a spotlight. My reasoning behind this goes back over 100 years into psychology with stimulus/response, that is, the cause and effect of certain behaviors. Many individuals look at a negative thought as a causative driver. The negative thought exists as a cause, and our behavior toward that cause will determine the effect.

So, following this logic, if an individual has a negative thought which makes them feel sad, and that sadness causes them to binge drink, by removing the negative thought you’ll have removed the motivation for binge drinking. Doesn’t that sound kind of silly? The suggestion here is to turn off the negative thought so that it will turn off the consumption of alcohol.

Of course, this makes sense if we view the negative thought as a primal force in behavior. So, what if we started to think of the negative thought more as the result of something else? It means that the “something else” must change first. What if we took a different approach? What if we looked at a negative thought as an effect of some larger causal factor?

“You’re going to go through tough times – that’s life. But I say, ‘Nothing happens to you, it happens for you.’ See the positive in negative events.” – Joel Osteen

By reversing the cause-and-effect motion of negative thinking (saying that the negative thought is an effect), we now can ask a deeper, more penetrative question: Why are we thinking that negative thought? What is the underlying cause of that specific train of thinking? By reversing the cause-and-effect relationship of negative thinking, it allows the negative thinker to assume the role of diagnostician!

Below is a three-step process you can use to examine your negative thoughts, the role of it in your life, and how you can get rid of them:

1. Simply acknowledge the negative thought

Recognize the fact that there’s a negative thought in your mind instead of trying to go through a process of emotionally overlaying positive thoughts on top of it. Can you see how this exacerbates the issue? You have a negative thought, you immediately recognize that it must be changed, and you frantically scurry through the museum of your mind to find a positive thought to replace it.

In the meantime, while you are trying to find that positive thought, you’re feeling anxious, nervous, and guilty! When you finally find a positive thought to replace that negative thought, the normal process is to squash it. But you can’t! It’s like trying to get rid of weeds by covering them with rocks.

They will always find another way around the rock. It is the same with negative thoughts. Consequently, try acknowledging the negative thought.

2. Affirm the negative thought

It is a part of you. Instead of denying its existence, accept that it is there in front of you and that you are now willing to deal with it. If any of you reading this are dog lovers, you will know that the best way to get a dog next to you is by attempting to push it away from you. Every time you push the dog away it gets closer. This is the same with negative thinking because the harder you push the closer it gets.

“Always turn a negative situation into a positive situation.” – Michael Jordan

3. Acquit the thought

Give it permission to leave you. Thank it for its past importance in your life and allow it to be on its way! At this point feel free to replace the negative thought with a positive thought. What will begin to happen when you place the negative thought under the spotlight is that you will see how insignificantly small it actually is.

This is a process I’ve been using for quite some time, and it works! Oh sure, I still use affirmations on a daily basis; as a matter fact I have them right here in front of me. I find that affirmations are a tremendous way to stay positive because it doesn’t allow any room for bad things to grow. But since the average person thinks 60,000 to 65,000 thoughts per day, let’s face it, a few negative thoughts have to squeak in there!

The best advice that I can give is to not freak out over a negative thought. Acknowledge it, affirm it, and acquit it! This is magic. Watch what happens!

How do you handle negative thoughts? Let us know your tips below!

Image courtesy of Twenty20.com

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Success Advice

One Thing I Can Teach You About Life That Will Help You Forever.

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I used to be a very anxious person.

I was embarrassed by what I couldn’t do and every day was a struggle. From the moment I would wake up to the moment I’d go to bed, everything felt impossibly overwhelming. It’s a battle I’ve dealt with most of my life.

This daily struggle with mental illness taught me that the satisfaction didn’t lie in beating it; the satisfaction was in helping other people beat mental illness through my success in fighting it.


Recently, I was at work. It was a pretty standard day — nothing too exciting. I then had a catch up with one of the leaders I worked with.

She said something that got my attention: “One of our colleagues is battling a mental illness.”

I really wanted to help. My eyes lit up. There was no need to uncover my plan with anyone else. I knew that staying discrete was fundamental.

I approached the person in question and asked for a few minutes of their time.

I didn’t ask them to admit their mental illness struggle; I just shared my story.

I talked about the anxiety stopping me from having a normal life, eating the right foods, going on dates with girls, having the career I wanted and traveling the world.

I wasn’t sure if any of it was sinking in or even helping. I felt compelled to go on. One thing I knew was that he was paying attention. I could see it in his eyes.

I then went on to talk about how I beat mental illness. Strategies such as:

  • Creating fear lists
  • Seeking professional help
  • Working on myself
  • Books I read
  • Events I attended

Out of nowhere, he started opening up about his own struggle. I was shocked.
It wasn’t pretty. He had an extreme case of mental illness that I certainly couldn’t diagnose or give professional advice on.

All I could do was show him through my own story that there was hope

I offered him access to all the resources I had. I told him that he had my full support and I’d be happy to help in any way I could. He then said:

“What was your psychologist’s name?”

I told him I’d look it up and send it to him. I didn’t have the answer in front of me, but I was determined when I got home to find it.

At the end of the catch-up, he smiled. I don’t think he’d smiled like that in a very long time.

That smile gave me so much satisfaction. It made my own struggle with mental illness worth it. All those sleepless nights, times spent vomiting into the toilet and dark days where I didn’t want to go on made sense.


“It took more than seven years for me to understand that my own battle with mental illness actually had a benefit”

That benefit was the satisfaction in seeing someone beat their mental illness because I was able to defeat mine.

It’s probably the greatest satisfaction of my entire life.

That’s one thing I can teach you about life that will help you forever.

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Success is for the Self-Taught

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Truman Capote, Jimi Hendrix, Steve Jobs, Nikola Tesla. Those are four names you never thought you’d see in a sentence together. As it happens, these four individuals have more in common than their success, ingenuity, and fame. They were all autodidacts. In other words, they were self-taught learners. (more…)

Ellie Batchiyska is a writer for Every USB, helping business and entrepreneurs with their branding through the use of custom flash drives.

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4 Comments

4 Comments

  1. Toño

    Mar 12, 2016 at 4:42 am

    This is the highest compliment I’ve ever received, Tim, I appreciate it very much. Your support and connection means a lot, I feel how I started to believe in myself more, even though still so much work and things to learn to actually master my mind and improve my life.

    Happy Saturday for you and everyone around (it may be already evening for, but still), thank you so much for inspiring the world and following your calling. If I somehow can give something back to you or help with anything, please let me know.

    • Tim Denning

      Mar 12, 2016 at 8:18 am

      Thanks Toño. Connect with me on Twitter or Facebook so I can stay in touch.

  2. Toño

    Mar 10, 2016 at 6:46 pm

    It was a slow day at work that turned into non-pleasant event. I reacted exactly the same, feeling how negativity got deep down as it was a poison.. For about 5 minutes I kept thinking about it, focusing on what happened, ready to judge and become frustrated. Then I just told myself to stop and reached out to my computer where already was an open tab with addcited2success. I printed a fresh copy of your latest article and dived deep into it. Reading calmed down my wandering mind and I’ve found advice I was so grateful to get, right on time when I was asking for it.

    Understand your connection to the Universe. Change your response from negative into default one. Just do the switch. I was so obsessed with that event that turned myself into negative state of mind. What I put out into the world get straight back at me. For the whole day I was thinking that negative way and got exactly what I was ‘asking’ for..

    I have changed my thoughts immediately and after just few minutes started feel better. Amzaing! Simple thing I actually quite aware of, but still, for some reason, leave behind so often. You basically saved my evening, Tim, as I’ve spent the rest of my work hours in a good mood and got home in a chilled state of mind. How grateful I am for everything you’ve done, and you still full of surprises, fresh ideas and never-ending energy! Keep on going, my friend and thank you so very much 🙂

    The whole article is powerful, I already read it twice and left a copy on my desk for my co-workers.

    • Tim Denning

      Mar 11, 2016 at 11:59 pm

      Toño you are starting to master your mind better than anyone I know. I have shared your thank you note with my Facebook friends. All of us have these days, but it’s how you come back from the low’s that counts.

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Success Advice

Success is for the Self-Taught

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self education
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Truman Capote, Jimi Hendrix, Steve Jobs, Nikola Tesla. Those are four names you never thought you’d see in a sentence together. As it happens, these four individuals have more in common than their success, ingenuity, and fame. They were all autodidacts. In other words, they were self-taught learners.

The talents and innovations that skyrocketed them to fame were the products of their own teachings. Make no mistake, this doesn’t mean a formal education is a waste of time. However, it goes to show that success is crafted solely by commitment and focus. While college and traineeships can prepare us for the groundwork of what we pursue, it’s ultimately up to us as individuals to teach ourselves how to refine our knowledge for success.

It’s the self-taught principles that allow us to distinguish our own work from that of others. With the help of the internet, self-taught success is more possible than ever. And there are plenty of ways to reach our inner autodidact.

Elon Musk had science degrees from top Ivy League universities, but he still credits most of his knowledge to the textbooks he allegedly “committed to memory.” Reading is just one way to teach yourself everything you need to know. Aspiring inventors can surely learn a lot by sacrificing some of their leisure time to sit down with a textbook.

For writers and artists, the best study is to just read. Read anything. Inspiration can be derived from poetry, works of fiction, etc. These also help you develop your writing skills, which is an important asset for any aspiring entrepreneur.

“Self-education is, I firmly believe, the only kind of education there is.” – Isaac Asimov

With the help of online Master Classes, Youtube videos, and apps – where online courses developed by some of the top U.S. educational institutions can be accessed remotely – self-taught success is more attainable than ever.

What’s more, we learn through practice. We can publish our own eBooks through Amazon without the publishing house bureaucracy. We can advertise our product, brand, or service through social media savvy without astronomical advertising costs. And as we practice, we learn. We gain feedback from our followers, learn from our mistakes, and do it better the second time around.

Even when you’re teaching yourself, others are always helping. However, you get to decide which lessons are most constructive, and you get to apply them to the real world in real-time.

The Science of Self-Taught

People have a tendency to romanticize the concept of self-taught success. It’s not a solution for laziness, or an excuse for lack of motivation. In many cases, teaching yourself is more work than being taught. The level of accountability rises when you are both teacher and student. Furthermore, it requires more discipline. Without a structured schedule or a guaranteed reward at the end of your efforts, your only hope is your dedication.

Beyond this, however, the only thing stopping most people from teaching themselves is insecurity. Fear of failure and inadequacy halts self-taught learners in their tracks. Especially because with self-teaching, inevitably, comes occasional failure. Unfortunately, the self-taught often feel they have nobody to blame the failure on but themselves – no teachers, mentors, or trainers as scapegoats.

According to Psychology Today, there is nothing that makes certain people better self-taught learners than others. The only difference is motivation, and willingness to overcome that lingering insecurity. Even the concept of “learning styles” is erroneous, says Psychology Today. While each individual is different, ability to learn is not based on preference, but expertise.

Beginners learn better from examples, while experts learn better by solving problems. This builds yet another case for autodidacts, who are more likely to learn by experience – the most effective method.

“Wisdom is not a product of schooling but a lifelong attempt to acquire it.” – Albert Einstein

The Rewards of Being Self-Taught

The fruits of your labor taste sweeter when you’ve taught yourself how to grow them. As such, success is more enjoyable when your self-education has contributed to it. All successful individuals have something in common: they’ve taken the initiative to teach themselves new things, or to supplement their formal education with self-teaching, as well.

Therefore, not all groundbreaking inventors, artists, and philosophers are solely self-taught. However, they’ve still accompanied their college training with their own individual quest for knowledge.

There is a simple reason why autodidacts thrive the most: because they’re always learning. The one mistake people who solely rely on formal education and training make is the mistake of stopping their learning process altogether once it’s over. Not only does this prevent you from being up-to-date on the latest concepts and advancements in your field, but it obstructs your brain’s thirst for mental stimulation.

By constantly learning and teaching ourselves new things, no matter how small or large they might be, we could change the course of our overall health and well-being. Research even shows that mental stimulation (consisting of practicing memorization, learning new things, and improving our skill in existing hobbies) is key to slowing down the development of, and possibly even reversing, Alzheimer’s and dementia.

Motivational speaker and entrepreneur Jim Rohn was noted for saying, “Formal education will make you a living; self-education will make you a fortune.” This does not mean you should abandon the pursuit of formal education, as it often serves as the foundation for self-education. But, it does mean we should maintain, cater to, and quench our thirst for knowledge as much as we possibly can.

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Success Advice

6 Expert Tips for Building Relationships With Those You Idolize

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Many of us dream of one day meeting a celebrity. Be it a movie star or a pro football player, we have a tendency to idolize these individuals, even looking to them for guidance as we make life decisions. In business, we can also find people we idolize. Individuals who have achieved great success with their own company or even revolutionized an industry.

From these people, we can learn key skills, gain valuable insights or even form partnerships to take our own business ventures to the next level. Yes, it is possible to form real relationships with your business idols or industry influencers. But like any other relationship, it requires work.

Here’s 6 ways you can start forming the relationships that will make a lasting difference for your entrepreneurial goals:

1. Do Your Research

Facebook stalking may be creepy for normal relationships, but doing some online research is perfectly okay for business leaders and influencers. After all, most influencers are extremely active online, either through social media, their own website or guest blogging. This basic research gives you a chance to better understand your business idol.

What do they like or dislike? What are their opinions on current trends? What do they talk like? These simple bits of information will help you better know how to approach them and determine if a relationship could prove beneficial.

“The richest people in the world look for and build networks. Everyone else looks for work.” – Robert Kiyosaki

2. Comment Carefully

Your initial research also serves as your first chance for engagement with your business idol. By liking social media posts or leaving thoughtful comments on blog articles, you can make a positive first impression.

Of course, leaving quality comments is sometimes easier said than done. As Kevin Duncan of SmartBlogger explains, thoughtfully contributing to the discussion with personal experiences or meaningful questions are a great way to get the conversation started.

“When you share a personal insight, bloggers can more easily relate to you. You’re no longer just an unfamiliar name making a comment that could have been left by anyone …the more personal your insight, the more unique it will be. And the more unique your insight, the more memorable your comment will be and the more you’ll stand out.”

3. Group Participation

Business leaders and influencers won’t only be found on blogs. Many are also active participants in online industry groups. Whether on Facebook or LinkedIn, these groups allow industry professionals to discuss current trends, ask for advice, or share new opportunities.

If you wish to make a positive impression, you should seek out, join and actively participate in these online groups. Avoid the temptation to promote yourself or your business. Instead, engage in conversations much like you would with a quality blog comment. By sharing your unique experiences and insights, you’ll build a stronger reputation among your peers.

4. Face Time

Online discussions are a great place to start, but the best relationships typically require some face-to-face interaction. You make a much more lasting impression when you have an in-person conversation. Industry conventions or lectures are great places to connect with others in your field. When you show yourself as a living, breathing human being, rather than just a name behind the computer, it becomes so much easier to make a personal connection and form a real, lasting relationship — and that can pay big dividends for future pitches.

Setting up a face-to-face meeting can be tricky. After all, you don’t want to come off as creepy. However, if you’ve already established an online rapport, asking if an influencer would like to briefly meet in person at an event you’re both attending shouldn’t be a problem.

5. Add Value

All relationships have a bit of give and take — and this is especially true when forming relationships in the business world. If you’re only approaching a business idol because you hope to gain something (like an extra investor in your startup), you likely won’t have success. Instead, find ways that you can contribute value.

As leadership consultant Randy Hain explains, “‘What can I do to help you?’ is absolutely one of the best ways to get business relationships off to a great start. Invest in the other person first, with no expectation of return. Do not keep score. Simply make the investment and over time you will benefit from the seeds of generosity you have planted.”

“Networking is the No. 1 unwritten rule of success in business.” – Sallie Krawcheck

6. Focus On the Long-Term

The aforementioned tactics aren’t “one and done” tips. Instead, you’ll need to continually practice them to show your genuine interest and build the kinds of friendships that can pay lasting dividends for everyone involved.

Relationships aren’t a short-term investment — and this is especially true if you want help on your own road to success. Real relationships need time to grow. They need continual nurturing. With a patient, long-term approach, you’ll be less tempted to jump right into a sales pitch and more likely to focus on a genuine friendship that delivers a real payoff.

Becoming an entrepreneur may put you in the role of the underdog — but this doesn’t mean you have to go at it alone. As you form genuine relationships with influencers and other business professionals, you’ll gain access to new sources of knowledge.

You’ll find friends who are willing to help or mentors willing to share their time. You may even find a new business partner. Relationship-building is a lifelong endeavor, but it will always pay off in the end.

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Stop Denying Your Negative Thoughts and Start Embracing Them

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Over the years, many of the talking heads and pundits in the personal development and success science industry have talked about the immediate replacement of negative thoughts with positive thoughts. The logic behind that particular behavioral strategy seems to make sense on the surface. Think about it, when a negative thought rears its ugly head, we should immediately dive into the repository of positive thoughts that we have available to us so that we could immediately begin to dwell on it.

Even further, some gurus of the genre suggest removing any chance of having a negative thought by the constant repetition of affirmations. Again, tried-and-true motivational technology that is very workable and still useful. I would suggest, however, that you view the above behaviors as tactics more than strategies.

I will further suggest to you that you do not abhor your negative thoughts but rather embrace them, examine them, and place them under a spotlight. My reasoning behind this goes back over 100 years into psychology with stimulus/response, that is, the cause and effect of certain behaviors. Many individuals look at a negative thought as a causative driver. The negative thought exists as a cause, and our behavior toward that cause will determine the effect.

So, following this logic, if an individual has a negative thought which makes them feel sad, and that sadness causes them to binge drink, by removing the negative thought you’ll have removed the motivation for binge drinking. Doesn’t that sound kind of silly? The suggestion here is to turn off the negative thought so that it will turn off the consumption of alcohol.

Of course, this makes sense if we view the negative thought as a primal force in behavior. So, what if we started to think of the negative thought more as the result of something else? It means that the “something else” must change first. What if we took a different approach? What if we looked at a negative thought as an effect of some larger causal factor?

“You’re going to go through tough times – that’s life. But I say, ‘Nothing happens to you, it happens for you.’ See the positive in negative events.” – Joel Osteen

By reversing the cause-and-effect motion of negative thinking (saying that the negative thought is an effect), we now can ask a deeper, more penetrative question: Why are we thinking that negative thought? What is the underlying cause of that specific train of thinking? By reversing the cause-and-effect relationship of negative thinking, it allows the negative thinker to assume the role of diagnostician!

Below is a three-step process you can use to examine your negative thoughts, the role of it in your life, and how you can get rid of them:

1. Simply acknowledge the negative thought

Recognize the fact that there’s a negative thought in your mind instead of trying to go through a process of emotionally overlaying positive thoughts on top of it. Can you see how this exacerbates the issue? You have a negative thought, you immediately recognize that it must be changed, and you frantically scurry through the museum of your mind to find a positive thought to replace it.

In the meantime, while you are trying to find that positive thought, you’re feeling anxious, nervous, and guilty! When you finally find a positive thought to replace that negative thought, the normal process is to squash it. But you can’t! It’s like trying to get rid of weeds by covering them with rocks.

They will always find another way around the rock. It is the same with negative thoughts. Consequently, try acknowledging the negative thought.

2. Affirm the negative thought

It is a part of you. Instead of denying its existence, accept that it is there in front of you and that you are now willing to deal with it. If any of you reading this are dog lovers, you will know that the best way to get a dog next to you is by attempting to push it away from you. Every time you push the dog away it gets closer. This is the same with negative thinking because the harder you push the closer it gets.

“Always turn a negative situation into a positive situation.” – Michael Jordan

3. Acquit the thought

Give it permission to leave you. Thank it for its past importance in your life and allow it to be on its way! At this point feel free to replace the negative thought with a positive thought. What will begin to happen when you place the negative thought under the spotlight is that you will see how insignificantly small it actually is.

This is a process I’ve been using for quite some time, and it works! Oh sure, I still use affirmations on a daily basis; as a matter fact I have them right here in front of me. I find that affirmations are a tremendous way to stay positive because it doesn’t allow any room for bad things to grow. But since the average person thinks 60,000 to 65,000 thoughts per day, let’s face it, a few negative thoughts have to squeak in there!

The best advice that I can give is to not freak out over a negative thought. Acknowledge it, affirm it, and acquit it! This is magic. Watch what happens!

How do you handle negative thoughts? Let us know your tips below!

Image courtesy of Twenty20.com

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One Thing I Can Teach You About Life That Will Help You Forever.

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I used to be a very anxious person.

I was embarrassed by what I couldn’t do and every day was a struggle. From the moment I would wake up to the moment I’d go to bed, everything felt impossibly overwhelming. It’s a battle I’ve dealt with most of my life.

This daily struggle with mental illness taught me that the satisfaction didn’t lie in beating it; the satisfaction was in helping other people beat mental illness through my success in fighting it.


Recently, I was at work. It was a pretty standard day — nothing too exciting. I then had a catch up with one of the leaders I worked with.

She said something that got my attention: “One of our colleagues is battling a mental illness.”

I really wanted to help. My eyes lit up. There was no need to uncover my plan with anyone else. I knew that staying discrete was fundamental.

I approached the person in question and asked for a few minutes of their time.

I didn’t ask them to admit their mental illness struggle; I just shared my story.

I talked about the anxiety stopping me from having a normal life, eating the right foods, going on dates with girls, having the career I wanted and traveling the world.

I wasn’t sure if any of it was sinking in or even helping. I felt compelled to go on. One thing I knew was that he was paying attention. I could see it in his eyes.

I then went on to talk about how I beat mental illness. Strategies such as:

  • Creating fear lists
  • Seeking professional help
  • Working on myself
  • Books I read
  • Events I attended

Out of nowhere, he started opening up about his own struggle. I was shocked.
It wasn’t pretty. He had an extreme case of mental illness that I certainly couldn’t diagnose or give professional advice on.

All I could do was show him through my own story that there was hope

I offered him access to all the resources I had. I told him that he had my full support and I’d be happy to help in any way I could. He then said:

“What was your psychologist’s name?”

I told him I’d look it up and send it to him. I didn’t have the answer in front of me, but I was determined when I got home to find it.

At the end of the catch-up, he smiled. I don’t think he’d smiled like that in a very long time.

That smile gave me so much satisfaction. It made my own struggle with mental illness worth it. All those sleepless nights, times spent vomiting into the toilet and dark days where I didn’t want to go on made sense.


“It took more than seven years for me to understand that my own battle with mental illness actually had a benefit”

That benefit was the satisfaction in seeing someone beat their mental illness because I was able to defeat mine.

It’s probably the greatest satisfaction of my entire life.

That’s one thing I can teach you about life that will help you forever.

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