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Success Advice

It’s Time to Stop Chasing a False Image of Success

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Each person reading this will have a different idea about what accomplishing success involves. For some, you want to lose weight. For others, you desire to build a business that creates financial freedom. An excellent general definition could be becoming the best you in each major area of your life.

Whatever success means to you has probably been shaped and modeled over the years by the images you see of people in your sphere creating success for themselves. Social media has millions of daily users that are sharing information about their life and business. You see stories of success and what looks like impressive wins. It’s not uncommon for people to share a highlight reel without talking about the struggle on the path to accomplishing those wins.

Conceptually, we know that we don’t get to see the full picture when someone shares their wins, but seeing those images of what we feel is success feeds into our limiting beliefs. We get caught in the comparison trap even though we know better. The comparison cripples success-seekers. 

If you’re going to reach new growth levels and accomplish your goals, you’ll need to stop chasing a false image of what it takes to create success. Here’s why.

Vanity Influences the Creation of False Narratives

The Internet and social media have created a culture in which individuals can instantly get their ego fed. You post an accomplishment, and immediate praise follows. That ego hit is intoxicating and makes individuals want to experience it often. The vanity causes false narratives about what’s happening in someone’s life. 

If your image of success is this vanity-driven false narrative, you’re going to be the one left without a chair when the music stops. Your look into someone else’s success journey is a surface-level glance. You can’t base what you do and the decisions you make on the little bit you see.

It’s great to see success and be inspired by it. A smart strategy is when you see success and research the elements and steps that could help you — model success and use what you see from others as motivation. But, don’t let an incomplete narrative be your driving force towards your goals.

“Attitude drives actions. Actions drive results. Results drive lifestyles.” – Jim Rohn

Beware of Being Sold a Lifestyle 

In the day and age that we live in, entrepreneurs sell books, digital information products, consulting, and coaching. For some of these entrepreneurs, portraying a lifestyle of success is a marketing tactic. You’ve probably seen a social media ad in your feed from an entrepreneur advertising an appealing lifestyle that doesn’t require a lot of work.

You have to look at the motivation and reason behind images of success in others. If the success posters are trying to sell you on a lifestyle, it’s not likely you’ll get the full picture of their success — if it’s even real. Don’t fall for the flashy copy or good advertising. 

The reality is that you probably don’t need another course to understand your success path. You need more execution of what you already know, and you need to develop consistent healthy habits. Your intuition knows what you need. 

There is No Substitute for the Work 

Images of success can be an inspiration, but if success becomes a reality in your life, it will happen when you do the work. There is no substitute for mapping out your goals, taking daily action, and pushing through moments of challenge. The main image you should aspire to is a vision of you being consistent in doing the hard work to be your best you. 

Success is putting in the work and being motivated by the process. Success is experiencing setbacks and learning from them. You create success by understanding that it’s okay to want more from life and stop waiting for permission to step into your power. Success happens with healthy boundaries and enforcing them.

A false image of success has held you back for far too long. The image you should strive for is your vision of your dream life. Visualizing success is a powerful strategy that doesn’t involve what anyone else is doing.

Get clarity on what you want and get to work. Let the false images of success come and go. You know what you have to do — it’s time to work.

Lisa Collum is a CEO, author, educator, and mother of four with a remarkable history of working to change lives both inside and outside the classroom. She owns and operates two educational companies, Top Score Writing, Inc., and Coastal Middle and High School. She has 16 years of real-world experience helping women start and build businesses. Her focus is on helping women entrepreneurs create the strategy and tactics that consistently generate revenue, create financial security, and do it all with balance. Join her at lisacollum.com.

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Change Your Mindset

The One Leadership Habit That Separates the Great From the Forgettable

True leaders don’t just speak their values, they live them, proving that integrity is the foundation of lasting influence.

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Success Advice

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Life

9 Harsh Truths Every Young Man Must Face to Succeed in the Modern World

Before chasing success, every young man needs to face these 9 brutal realities shaping masculinity in the modern world.

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Many young men today quietly battle depression, loneliness, and a sense of confusion about who they’re meant to be.

Some blame the lack of deep friendships or romantic relationships. Others feel lost in a digital world that often labels traditional masculinity as “toxic.”

But the truth is this: becoming a man in the modern age takes more than just surviving. It takes resilience, direction, and a willingness to grow even when no one’s watching.

Success doesn’t arrive by accident or luck. It’s built on discipline, sacrifice, and consistency.

Here are 9 harsh truths every young man should know if he wants to thrive, not just survive, in the digital age.

1. Never Use Your Illness as an Excuse

As Dr. Jordan B. Peterson often says, successful people don’t complain; they act.

Your illness, hardship, or struggle shouldn’t define your limits; it should define your motivation. Rest when you must, but always get back up and keep building your dreams. Motivation doesn’t appear magically. It comes after you take action.

Here are five key lessons I’ve learned from Dr. Peterson:

  • Learn to write clearly; clarity of thought makes you dangerous.

  • Read quality literature in your free time.

  • Nurture a strong relationship with your family.

  • Share your ideas publicly; your voice matters.

  • Become a “monster”, powerful, but disciplined enough to control it.

The best leaders and thinkers are grounded. They welcome criticism, adapt quickly, and keep moving forward no matter what.

2. You Can’t Please Everyone And That’s Okay

You don’t need a crowd of people to feel fulfilled. You need a few friends who genuinely accept you for who you are.

If your circle doesn’t bring out your best, it’s okay to walk away. Solitude can be a powerful teacher. It gives you space to understand what you truly want from life. Remember, successful men aren’t people-pleasers; they’re purpose-driven.

3. You Can Control the Process, Not the Outcome

Especially in creative work, writing, business, or content creation, you control effort, not results.

You might publish two articles a day, but you can’t dictate which one will go viral. Focus on mastery, not metrics. Many great writers toiled for years in obscurity before anyone noticed them. Rejection, criticism, and indifference are all part of the path.

The best creators focus on storytelling, not applause.

4. Rejection Is Never Personal

Rejection doesn’t mean you’re unworthy. It simply means your offer, idea, or timing didn’t align.

Every successful person has faced rejection repeatedly. What separates them is persistence and perspective. They see rejection as feedback, not failure. The faster you learn that truth, the faster you’ll grow.

5. Women Value Comfort and Security

Understanding women requires maturity and empathy.

Through books, lectures, and personal growth, I’ve learned that most women desire a man who is grounded, intelligent, confident, emotionally stable, and consistent. Some want humor, others intellect, but nearly all want to feel safe and supported.

Instead of chasing attention, work on self-improvement. Build competence and confidence, and the rest will follow naturally.

6. There’s No Such Thing as Failure, Only Lessons

A powerful lesson from Neuro-Linguistic Programming: failure only exists when you stop trying.

Every mistake brings data. Every setback builds wisdom. The most successful men aren’t fearless. They’ve simply learned to act despite fear.

Be proud of your scars. They’re proof you were brave enough to try.

7. Public Speaking Is an Art Form

Public speaking is one of the most valuable and underrated skills a man can master.

It’s not about perfection; it’s about connection. The best speakers tell stories, inspire confidence, and make people feel seen. They research deeply, speak honestly, and practice relentlessly.

If you can speak well, you can lead, sell, teach, and inspire. Start small, practice at work, in class, or even in front of a mirror, and watch your confidence skyrocket.

8. Teaching Is Leadership in Disguise

Great teachers are not just knowledgeable. They’re brave, compassionate, and disciplined.

Teaching forces you to articulate what you know, and in doing so, you master it at a deeper level. Whether you’re mentoring a peer, leading a team, or sharing insights online, teaching refines your purpose.

Lifelong learners become lifelong leaders.

9. Study Human Nature to Achieve Your Dreams

One of the toughest lessons to accept: most people are self-interested.

That’s not cynicism, it’s human nature. Understanding this helps you navigate relationships, business, and communication more effectively.

Everyone has a darker side, but successful people learn to channel theirs productively into discipline, creativity, and drive.

Psychology isn’t just theory; it’s a toolkit. Learn how people think, act, and decide, and you’ll know how to lead them, influence them, and even understand yourself better.

Final Thoughts

The digital age offers endless opportunities, but only to those who are willing to take responsibility, confront discomfort, and keep improving.

Becoming a man today means embracing the hard truths most avoid.

Because at the end of the day, success isn’t about luck. It’s about who you become when life tests you the most.

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Change Your Mindset

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