Change Your Mindset
The Myth of Motivation: How to Get Unstuck
Many of us get stuck in the trap that motivation is something we need to have first to start or finish a task. Unfortunately, that’s not always the case.
I am sure you’ve been in situations where your mind wanted to accomplish something, but your body said, “Nope, not today.” It’s almost like you are fighting yourself for the very thing you said you wanted to get done.
Many of us procrastinate until we don’t want to think about the task anymore or unconsciously find something else to do to keep our minds preoccupied.
American essayist Ralph Waldo Emerson is famously quoted as saying, “Do the thing, and you will get the energy to do the thing.” In translation, even if you don’t feel like writing or working out now, once you open your laptop and start typing or tie up your running shoes and walk out the door, the energy you are seeking to get it done will come after you start.
Even though this quote was said in the 1800s, science is proving what Emerson noted so many years ago.
Here’s the thing about motivation
For so long scientific research associated the dopamine neurotransmitter with pleasure; however, new research confirms that it is also responsible for motivation.
Many of us wait until we feel inspired or motivated to start a new task or habit. We patiently wait for the dopamine to be released into our brain, hoping it gives us the motivation to work out or start writing that new book. And we all know it rarely comes.
Here’s why: motivation comes after starting a task, not before. So, if you desire to start writing a book or hitting the gym after work – try focusing on what David Allen calls the “2-minute rule.”
The rule states, “When you start a new habit, it should take less than two minutes to do.”
So how does this work? When you want to develop a new habit, just focus on the first 2 minutes of the task, and once you do, the motivation surge comes!
If you want to read more, just focus on opening the book and reading one page. If you desire to run after work, just focus on lacing up your shoes and walking out the door. In both of these examples, you will find that once you get started, the rest of the task will flow quite easily.
The idea behind this strategy is just to start; then, your brain will start working for you, giving you the motivation you yearned for prior to starting the task.
As James Clear, author of Atomic Habits, stated, the greatest amount of friction for any type of new task is in the beginning. But when you set a goal just to lace up your shoes and walk out the door or just open your laptop and start writing – you make it so easy it’s difficult for you to say no.
“Don’t be pushed around by the fears in your mind. Be led by the dreams in your heart.” ― Roy T. Bennett
Get clear on what you need to accomplish
Another way to instill motivation for a task you want to complete is getting clear on when you are going to complete it. Schedule the task in your day!
This has been the most significant life hack for my consistent writing and reading every day. In fact, my wife and I have this saying that “if it’s not on the calendar, then it’s not getting done.” So even when we hold family meetings, we pop calendar invites on each other’s calendars because we know how busy life can be.
We have way too many distractions and demands to “hope” you’ll find the time to complete a task. Remember this: It’s not getting done if you don’t tell your brain when.
Instead of waiting around, hoping you will find time to complete a particular task, put the task on your calendar. This tells your brain that you won’t do anything else but this task.
The truth you need to understand about motivation
You’ll find that many people never start a task or pursue a goal because they “never got around to doing it.” But if you schedule your tasks daily – it almost puts your willpower and motivation on auto-pilot regardless if you “feel like doing it or not.”
For example, if you desire to hit the gym every other day after work between 5-6 pm – overtime through each gym session, you will begin to create a routine that creates less friction. And since we are creatures of habit – you will continue to deepen the corresponding neural pathway in your brain, making it easier for this new behavior to stick.
It’s almost like your body will pull you toward the newly established habit because you are consciously ingraining a learned behavior.
Many of us allow circumstances and emotions to unconsciously influence the tasks we hope to accomplish, but if you have a consistent routine – your body will naturally fall into line, making it easier on yourself.
So in the context of human change, motivation is less about having the sufficient energy to carry out a task. Instead, it’s more about understanding how your body develops its behaviors and actions. Once you gain knowledge of how your body works now, you can adequately guide yourself toward the desires you seek.
Personal Development
This Silent Habit Might Be Sabotaging Your Career
Your temper might be costing you more at work than you realize. Here’s why it matters.
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Change Your Mindset
The One Leadership Habit That Separates the Great From the Forgettable
True leaders don’t just speak their values, they live them, proving that integrity is the foundation of lasting influence.
Leadership isn’t defined by titles, speeches, or charisma; it’s defined by action. The most respected leaders in history didn’t just preach their values; they lived them. (more…)
Life
9 Harsh Truths Every Young Man Must Face to Succeed in the Modern World
Before chasing success, every young man needs to face these 9 brutal realities shaping masculinity in the modern world.
Many young men today quietly battle depression, loneliness, and a sense of confusion about who they’re meant to be.
Some blame the lack of deep friendships or romantic relationships. Others feel lost in a digital world that often labels traditional masculinity as “toxic.”
But the truth is this: becoming a man in the modern age takes more than just surviving. It takes resilience, direction, and a willingness to grow even when no one’s watching.
Success doesn’t arrive by accident or luck. It’s built on discipline, sacrifice, and consistency.
Here are 9 harsh truths every young man should know if he wants to thrive, not just survive, in the digital age.
1. Never Use Your Illness as an Excuse
As Dr. Jordan B. Peterson often says, successful people don’t complain; they act.
Your illness, hardship, or struggle shouldn’t define your limits; it should define your motivation. Rest when you must, but always get back up and keep building your dreams. Motivation doesn’t appear magically. It comes after you take action.
Here are five key lessons I’ve learned from Dr. Peterson:
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Learn to write clearly; clarity of thought makes you dangerous.
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Read quality literature in your free time.
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Nurture a strong relationship with your family.
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Share your ideas publicly; your voice matters.
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Become a “monster”, powerful, but disciplined enough to control it.
The best leaders and thinkers are grounded. They welcome criticism, adapt quickly, and keep moving forward no matter what.
2. You Can’t Please Everyone And That’s Okay
You don’t need a crowd of people to feel fulfilled. You need a few friends who genuinely accept you for who you are.
If your circle doesn’t bring out your best, it’s okay to walk away. Solitude can be a powerful teacher. It gives you space to understand what you truly want from life. Remember, successful men aren’t people-pleasers; they’re purpose-driven.
3. You Can Control the Process, Not the Outcome
Especially in creative work, writing, business, or content creation, you control effort, not results.
You might publish two articles a day, but you can’t dictate which one will go viral. Focus on mastery, not metrics. Many great writers toiled for years in obscurity before anyone noticed them. Rejection, criticism, and indifference are all part of the path.
The best creators focus on storytelling, not applause.
4. Rejection Is Never Personal
Rejection doesn’t mean you’re unworthy. It simply means your offer, idea, or timing didn’t align.
Every successful person has faced rejection repeatedly. What separates them is persistence and perspective. They see rejection as feedback, not failure. The faster you learn that truth, the faster you’ll grow.
5. Women Value Comfort and Security
Understanding women requires maturity and empathy.
Through books, lectures, and personal growth, I’ve learned that most women desire a man who is grounded, intelligent, confident, emotionally stable, and consistent. Some want humor, others intellect, but nearly all want to feel safe and supported.
Instead of chasing attention, work on self-improvement. Build competence and confidence, and the rest will follow naturally.
6. There’s No Such Thing as Failure, Only Lessons
A powerful lesson from Neuro-Linguistic Programming: failure only exists when you stop trying.
Every mistake brings data. Every setback builds wisdom. The most successful men aren’t fearless. They’ve simply learned to act despite fear.
Be proud of your scars. They’re proof you were brave enough to try.
7. Public Speaking Is an Art Form
Public speaking is one of the most valuable and underrated skills a man can master.
It’s not about perfection; it’s about connection. The best speakers tell stories, inspire confidence, and make people feel seen. They research deeply, speak honestly, and practice relentlessly.
If you can speak well, you can lead, sell, teach, and inspire. Start small, practice at work, in class, or even in front of a mirror, and watch your confidence skyrocket.
8. Teaching Is Leadership in Disguise
Great teachers are not just knowledgeable. They’re brave, compassionate, and disciplined.
Teaching forces you to articulate what you know, and in doing so, you master it at a deeper level. Whether you’re mentoring a peer, leading a team, or sharing insights online, teaching refines your purpose.
Lifelong learners become lifelong leaders.
9. Study Human Nature to Achieve Your Dreams
One of the toughest lessons to accept: most people are self-interested.
That’s not cynicism, it’s human nature. Understanding this helps you navigate relationships, business, and communication more effectively.
Everyone has a darker side, but successful people learn to channel theirs productively into discipline, creativity, and drive.
Psychology isn’t just theory; it’s a toolkit. Learn how people think, act, and decide, and you’ll know how to lead them, influence them, and even understand yourself better.
Final Thoughts
The digital age offers endless opportunities, but only to those who are willing to take responsibility, confront discomfort, and keep improving.
Becoming a man today means embracing the hard truths most avoid.
Because at the end of the day, success isn’t about luck. It’s about who you become when life tests you the most.
Change Your Mindset
Work-Life Balance Isn’t a Myth: Here’s How to Actually Make It Happen
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Starting a new job often comes with excitement and ambition. Yet, beneath that initial enthusiasm, many employees quickly encounter the reality of workplace challenges, especially stress. (more…)
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