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30 Things to Start Doing Right Now to Improve Your Life

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30 Things to Start Doing Right Now to Improve Your Life

Have you ever wondered why there are so many unhappy people around? It’s difficult to meet a happy person, and that is why we consider it normal when life is full of problems and sorrow.

It is not normal. The reality should be different. Happiness and peace should accompany our soul all the time. What makes us unhappy is overestimated expectations toward ourselves, our relatives, our income, our career, etc.

People who have overestimated expectations consider their imperfection and environment a reason of their unstable internality. They are sure to jitter because the reality differs from what they want, and they think they should make all dreams come true to recover poise.

But such assurance is not enough. Every day is the starting point of something new. While we make plans, life goes by, and we don’t become happier. Don’t make plans. Motivate yourself to live right now.

Make your every day amazing with these 30 things to do right now:

 

1. Spend time with right people

They love you and have a positive influence on you. They make you feel a passion to life, they accept you for whom you are, and you want to look up to them.

 

2. Meet problems with your head high

It’s not your problems only that can tell about you but the way you solve them and react to them. Problems will not disappear until you start acting.

 

3. Be honest with yourself

Confess what you want to achieve and whom you want to be. Always be honest with yourself because you are the only person you can rely on. Look for the truth in your soul.

 

4Put your own happiness first

Your needs are important. If you do not take care of yourself and if you do not protect yourself, you make everything worse. Remember: it’s always possible to take care of yourself, taking into account the needs of those around you.

 

5Be yourself and be proud of that

Your attempts to become someone else damages the personality inside you. Be yourself, use that person inside – his or her ideas, strengths, charm — and you’ll become a better version of yourself. If you can’t do that, you won’t be able to do that with other people.

 

6Pay attention to the present

Everything wonderful happens right here and now. Right now is the only moment you have for sure, so stop thinking about your great future achievements. Stop living with your past or your future because life is what happens today. Be grateful for the moment your life gives you.

 

7Appreciate the lessons you’ve learned from your mistakes

If you don’t fail sometimes, you don’t try and learn. Great achievements always come at the end of a long road paved with mistakes and attempts. Risk, fail, try again. Build a bridge to your success.

 

8Be polite toward yourself

If you had a friend who spoke to you the way you spoke to yourself sometimes, would you be able to keep his company? Your attitude toward yourself is the example for others on how to behave with you.

 

9Take pleasure from what you already have

The problem of many people is their waiting for happiness to come after achieving something great, a level of life their boss or friends have, for example. As the result, your whole life will be spent on constant work, and you will not have time to stop and admire the moment. Learn to take pleasure from what you already have.

 

10Create your happiness

You waste your time, waiting for someone who’ll make you happy. Smile because you are the one who can do that. Choose your happiness and be the change you want to see in this world.

“Life is what happens to you while you’re busy making other plans.” – John Lennon

11Give a chance to your ideas and dreams

Life is not about getting a chance but using it. You’ll never be 100% sure you’ll succeed, but you can be 100% sure you won’t succeed if you do nothing. You will win anyway, whether it is success or a good lesson.

 

12Believe you are ready for the next step

You are ready! Think of it. You have everything needed for taking a small step forward. Use a chance and the  resources you have, and do not hide from problems.

 

13Build relations with new people when needed

Choose honest people who are a reflection of the personality you are or want to be. Build relations with people you are proud to call your friends, people who love and respect you.

 

14Give new people a chance

It’s the ugly truth, but you can’t support relations with everyone who was your friend. People change, and your priorities change, too. Relations come to an end, but new relations appear. Trust your judgments, appreciate a chance to meet new people and become their friends. Be ready to learn, get ready for problems, but also get ready to meet someone who will change your life forever.

 

15Compete with your old self

Get inspiration from people, value them, learn from them but remember: competing with them will be your waste of time. The only person to compete with is yourself.  Set goals to achieve more, and compete for becoming better than you are now.

 

16Be happy for others

Be happy for people who succeed, and be grateful for everything good they do for you. Sooner or later, your attitude toward them will come back to you, and people will be happy for you, too.

 

17Look for good in bad situations

When everything is bad and when you are upset, remember that problems can (and they will) make you stronger. Concentrate on what you have rather than what you don’t have.

 

18Forgive yourself and others

Healing is forgiving. It doesn’t mean you forget about something that hurt you; it means you forget your pain, learn from it, and move on.

 

19Help everyone around you

Take care of people. If you know a better way, show it to them. The more you help others, the more others will want to help you. Love and kindness bear love and kindness. And it will always be so.

 

20Listen to your inner self

If it helps, discuss your ideas with your close friends, but do not forget about your intuition, too. Be honest with yourself. Do what your heart tells you to do.

“Wealth is the ability to fully experience life.” – Henry David Thoreau

21Do not allow yourself to stress. Take some breaks

Slow down and take it easy. Allow yourself to pause and go forward clearly and purposefully. When you are busy, a little break can bring you back to the freshness of mind.

 

22Notice a beauty of every moment

Look for happiness in small events instead of waiting for something great to happen: a cup of coffee in the morning, a smell of homemade food, or hands of a beloved person in your hands.

 

23Accept good even if it’s not ideal

Remember: the ideal is the enemy of good. Sometimes it’s better to accept the world and people rather than trying to idealize them. Learn to love unideal, too.

 

24Work on getting closer to your goals

The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. Whatever you dream about, do something to move closer to it every day.

 

25Don’t hide your feelings

If you feel bitter, give yourself time to take offense, but do not hide your emotions. Talk to your close friends about that, tell them what you feel. It’s not difficult to do, and it can be the first step toward your good mood.

 

26Be responsible for your life

Let your choices and mistakes be yours, be ready to do something to solve your problems. You are the only person who should manage your life. And yes, it’s not always easy.

 

27Develop the most important relations

You can’t be everything for everyone, but you can be everything for a couple of people. You do not need many friends, you need friends whom you can call real.

 

28Focus on what you can control

There are a lot of things out of our control. Focus on what you can control. If you can’t control something at least control your attitude or reaction to it.

 

29Focus on positive results

You should believe you CAN do it. Listen to your inner self, think positively. And take a step forward.

 

30Think about how rich you are

When hard times come, it’s important to see everything in the long view: you can choose clothes to wear today, you have water, you are free to have weird habits, you have the Internet access, etc. Be grateful for what you have.

 

Which one of these are you going to implement into your life first?

Lesley Vos is a private educator for college students. She writes a lot, mentoring Hugh Beaulac and blogging for many publications on education, career, success, motivation, and self-development. Don't hesitate to say hi and check more works of hers on Twitter.

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10 Comments

10 Comments

  1. John Gronau

    Aug 17, 2016 at 1:30 am

    I love point #8 that touches on being polite to ourselves. Often we do not recognize how hard we are on ourselves when trying to perform at the highest level or reach our goals. It’s such a simple message but one that can really make or break our success.

    Great article! Thank you for the uplifting message.

  2. Megha

    Apr 9, 2016 at 1:50 pm

    SUCH a value-added article Lesley!

  3. vikas

    Nov 19, 2015 at 1:42 am

    Best article I have ever read.

    • Lesley Vos

      Dec 1, 2015 at 12:31 pm

      Thanks! Happy to know you’ve liked it 🙂

  4. aspecialist

    Nov 8, 2015 at 7:43 pm

    I honestly think that this is worth reading. Getting these 30 things done will not only improve your personality, but it will also have an effect to the people around you. We must start from develop our own personality and be a good example to others to have a better society. Kudos to you for writing such an interesting blog.

    • Lesley Vos

      Dec 1, 2015 at 12:32 pm

      Thank you! Totally agree with you. If you want to change the world, start from changing yourself.))

  5. Ethan Bridges

    Nov 1, 2015 at 2:39 pm

    Hi Lesley,

    Give our ideas and dreams a chance–this is my favorite! I now realize I didn’t really do this for a long time.

    Great tips, thank you.

    • Lesley Vos

      Nov 2, 2015 at 8:39 am

      Hi, Ethan!

      Yes, it’s always my problem, too. But everything’s gonna change now 🙂 Glad you like the article!

      Cheers!

  6. Tim Denning

    Nov 1, 2015 at 12:10 am

    Great tips Lesley thank you so much.

    • Lesley Vos

      Nov 2, 2015 at 8:40 am

      You are welcome, Tim! I am honored to see my post live here, and I am happy to know readers find it interesting to check 🙂

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Life

How One Small Step Back Backwards Is One Giant Leap Forwards

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a step backwards is a leap forwards
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For me, this conjures up a scene in Monty Python’s Holy Grail where the king is explaining about how he built his castle on a swamp, each castle sank into the swamp until the fourth one stood firm.

It’s so incredibly important to have solid foundations on which to build your life or business. There are times though where we think we have a rock-solid foundation and ignore the holes forming in it. Just like we think we’re invincible and nothing can hurt us or affect us, we think our foundations are too.

There are times when we need to fix those holes and cracks but that means taking a step backwards and many see it as a weakness. Their ego will tell them they’re going in the wrong direction. Their ego will tell them they’re letting themselves down and they’ve become as weak as a little field mouse. I disagree though. I see the act of taking a step backwards to be one of the strongest and most powerful things we can do!

We begin these journeys whether in life or in business with big plans. We’re excited, our emotions are running high and just like a kid on Christmas day, we forget about most things because our focus is on the prize (or the presents). Maybe we forget to put the battery door back onto one of our gifts properly.

At first, everything is amazing. We spend hours playing with the new toy, it seems like only surgery will remove the smile from our face. Then it happens, the toy stops working because the batteries have fallen out (remember the door?), the smile weakens, the tears begin, the special day is filled with wails of sadness. All because you’d missed something at the beginning.

“When things go wrong, go back to the basics” –Urvi Mistry

Tame our ego

One of the most powerful things that stop us taking that step backwards is our ego. It would be like asking a NASA rocket scientist if they would like to read “Rocket Science for Dummies”, they just wouldn’t do it because they would see it as belittling their existing knowledge. I’ll be honest, I would have felt the same if someone had handed me an “Archery for Dummies” book just as I’d won my second British championship title.

These are the times when we have to suspend our ego. It can be difficult and many times we have to force ourselves to do it, but when we do we massively grow. It’s like when we go to a workshop or conference. The speaker lineup is awesome, you’re excited to see them. The event begins, the house lights dim and the stage is spotlit.

The first speaker comes on stage, begins talking and your first thoughts are “But I already know that”. The mental walls shoot up and you miss all of the golden nuggets available because your ego shut off your mind to any new information.

This is exactly the same process that happens when someone suggests to us that maybe we should take a few steps backwards to strengthen our foundation. The mental walls go up and our mind goes into lockdown. It’s like sticking fingers in our ears and loudly shouting “La La La La La La” so we don’t hear someone saying things.

So what can you do?

The first step is to slap your ego around the face with a wet trout. Your ego is used to being in control so doing something to disrupt that situation gives your conscious mind the control back long enough to jump in and begin reasoning and questioning the situation.

Start asking yourself “What do I REALLY need to do to fix things?”. The solution won’t be to stick a band-aid on, it’s to fix the core issues which can be anything from lack of systems/procedures, lack of academic knowledge or lack of experience. All of these fall into the realms of your foundations and that’s where your focus should be.

All too often we complicate things to the point where we stop seeing the solution. To stop your pizza from sticking to the box lid, you wouldn’t start to develop a non-stick cardboard coating so the cheese doesn’t stick to the lid when it gets dumped around by the delivery driver. You’d keep it simple and put the little plastic thing in the centre of the pizza instead.

“It’s very satisfying to take a problem we thought difficult and find a simple solution. The best solutions are always simple.” – Ivan Sutherland

When we complicate things, not only do we lose sight of the end goal, but we forget about the simple solutions. Those simple solutions reside in the realm of the basic, that place you get to when you take this valuable but sometimes difficult steps backwards. Yes, it’s going to be hard at first, yes it’s going to give you those feelings of failure and going back to school, but believe me when I tell you they will be the best, strongest and most powerful steps you take, on a par with Neil Armstrong’s small step for man.

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2 Simple Steps to Help You Break Through Your Fears

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If you are addicted to success you most certainly are addicted to fear too. Why? Because they are a direct consequence of each other. When you achieve success, it’s because you have taken actions and broken through fears that were holding you back. Every success you have comes from breaking a fear you held onto.

It is incredible to think how much energy and time entrepreneurs waste looking after their fears, making sure they are listened to. It is much harder to feed the energy of fear than feed the energy of success. I want you to think about the mental dilemma you face every single day, the battle you will probably have in your mind when it comes to taking certain actions in your business.

Shall I take that risk?

What if I’m rejected? What if I’m not good enough? What if I’ll be ridiculed in front of others? What if I fail? Just think of how hard it is to constantly listen and obey these thoughts.

The battle in your head is real and challenging. The good thing is you can win it, and the bad thing is there will always be a battle going on in your head. However, you can become a more consistent winner.

Success will always require a new level of expansion which will result in a new level of fears needed to be broken. Imagine this like an elastic band. Every time you face a fear, the elastic will stretch more and more, and the tension will be greater. When you become brave and take the action, the tension will be released and the elastic band will fly further creating a bigger expansion.

“The biggest risk is not taking any risk… In a world that changing really quickly, the only strategy that is guaranteed to fail is not taking risks.” – Mark Zuckerberg

Fears are normal and essentials to your success

If there are no fears, there’ll be no stretch and no expansion from you. If you want to succeed, you must break through some fears, and this is obvious. But how can you break through fears with ease? I personally used all the possible solutions available in the world to win my fears: meditation, counseling, talking therapies, exercises and many more.

Although those helped, the ultimate way to conquer your fears is to go straight through them. I won some of my biggest fears since starting my entrepreneurial journey that no one else and nothing could help me break. This seems better said than done, but by following a few simple steps, you can do it too.

Here are 2 simple steps to help you breakthrough those fears:

1. Becoming aware of what your fears are

Often they’re very well camouflaged, and they’ll appear in your life as if on autopilot, in the same way electricity comes when you flip a light switch. They’re often triggered by someone else’s actions or words, or by your idea on what the consequence of a certain action will bring to you.

Fears contain so much energy on their own, so imagine what you could do with that energy if you could use it to your advantage. Imagine fear being a close wrist. Every time you activate the fear, you give more energy to it. Every time you think of the fear, you feed the wrist with more power.

As you live your life controlled by fears, the wrists will get more and more powerful. Picture that. Then you try to take certain actions in your business like going live for the first time, proposing a deal to a certain client, writing an article where you express your very own controversial opinion about something, or invest money you currently do not have.

Fears will come in, fully charged. You try to win by punching towards the wall of action. You want to break through, and you know that on the other side of the wall there’s success.

You punch and keep punching but nothing happens. Then, imagine you taking the leap, pointing the wrist towards the wall and BANG! You break through.

Now, the energy of fear has been released and is now ready to be used to your advantage.

The energy will disperse and free itself and it will transmute into freedom and power to take further actions.

“If you are not willing to risk the unusual, you will have to settle for the ordinary.” – Jim Rohn

2. Figure out why you fear that certain thing

After you realise what the fear is, ask yourself, “Why do I fear to take this action?” Explore the consequences that breaking that specific fear will bring you. “What will happen if I break this and I achieve the results I desire?

These questions are vital, as you’ll realize your fears are just trying to keep you safe. Humans are not wired for success, they are wired for survival. So anything to do with success will be filtered through your lens of fear.

Once you realize WHAT will happen if you achieve the success you desire, which usually are negative scenarios, calm your mind and imagine a positive scenario instead. Write this down for each negative scenario your mind will create.

One of my biggest fears is the fear of being successful as I believe (my scenario) that people won’t like me anymore, and that I won’t be able to spend time with my family. So once I detected the fear, I changed the scenario. Instead of thinking people will not like me anymore, I create a new reality I desire which could look something like this: I will be able to help and impact more people and I will make sure I take lots of days off and delegate stuff to my team so to spend time with my family.

It is that simple. Once your subconscious mind is reassured with the new positive outcome, it will become easier for you to take action. In the end, always remember you’re in charge of your life, no one else, let alone your fears.

How do you conquer your fears? Let us know your advice and thoughts below!

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Being Alone With Yourself Is the Most Important Skill We Have Lost

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We live in a world where we’re always around people either at work, in the store, and on our phones through social media. In fact, our society tends to label anybody who wants to be or is alone, as a lonely person or even more terribly, a depressed person. We have forgotten how to enjoy our own company.

This is particularly surprising since some of the admired and highly celebrated icons in human history are well known to be “loners.” We have mastered a lot of skills from society, but perhaps we have neglected the most important skill of all. The ability to learn alone, to learn about your strengths and weaknesses, to reflect on the way forward in life, to just sit and appreciate nature, is invaluable.

Here are 4 ways to make being alone fun and productive:

1. Change scenery

You don’t have to do this all the time, but one way to enjoy your time alone is to take a trip or a very long drive or run. It can be difficult to spend time alone when you’re around familiar faces. It’s one of the reasons why people go on vacations away from home. Just get out and spend some time alone reflecting and enjoying your own company.

2. Switch off everything

We live in a world of digital communication. If you truly want to be alone for a while, it would be better if you didn’t login to Facebook and Twitter at all. Better yet, turn off your phone.

3. Reflect

Now that you are alone, it is time to reflect on what you want, what you have done, what you want to be doing. Silence or cool music might be good here. Whichever way, one of the things that make being alone rewarding is the fact that it affords you the opportunity to reflect.

“I’m reflective only in the sense that I learn to move forward. I reflect with a purpose.” – Kobe Bryant

4. Give yourself a treat

Go see a movie, buy a plate of food or a cup of ice-cream. Being alone is not only a time to think, it is also a time to pamper yourself. Treat yourself to the best things that you can afford and be happy and proud about it.

Now that you know how to make being alone fun and productive, it’s time to see the benefits of being alone. Here are 6 benefits you can expect from embracing being alone:

1. It aids personal growth

Apart from all the skills we get from self-development books, being alone helps build us. Through it, we are able to make plans, to ask critical questions and put our lives in the proper perspective. To grow, it is important that you take yourself out and properly assess your life alone, away from friends, families and colleagues.

2. It energizes

There are times when we’re stressed out by work, family, and friends, so being alone is a wonderful way to renew yourself with extra energy. This is the time to give yourself treats and plenty of rest and leisure, away from the stress of the world.

3. It increases the value you place on relationship

When you come to a point where you love being alone, it makes it so that you’re very intentional about your relationship with others. Being alone can also help you properly evaluate and see all there is to love and enjoy about your relationship with others.

4. It increases self-confidence

Another wonderful benefit of being alone is that it helps to boost your self- confidence and self esteem. The more time you spend alone with yourself, the more comfortable you are with your skill and with your strengths and weaknesses.

“You have to expect things of yourself before you can do them.” – Michael Jordan

5. It helps you become more empathetic

One thing about having friends and those we relate with very often is that we unconsciously develop a mentality that makes us empathetic towards them rather than others. Findings have shown that the more time you spend alone, the more compassion you’re able to show to a wider range of people.

6. The difference between being alone and being lonely

The desire to be alone is quite different from loneliness and sometimes, we do not take the required time to be alone because we don’t want to be perceived as “lonely” by others. To be lonely is to deeply want to relate and have communication with someone or some people but to be unable to.

It’s an ache that you carry around throughout the day, and it seriously affects all you do. It could make the entire world seem frustrating. The death of a loved one can lead to loneliness after a while.

Being alone on the other hand, as seen earlier, is intentionally deciding to get away from everybody and enjoying being with yourself as you reflect on your life and all that’s to come.

Taking time to be alone is very productive and it can be a wonderful thing for you. Take time away from social media and friends and find a nice spot to relax with yourself and analyze your habits and see how they affect your life.

Do you enjoy spending time by yourself? Share your thoughts below on if you think it benefits you and helps you recharge!

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Life

Simple Meditation Techniques To Enhance Your Productivity

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At times, the workplace can be a stressful place to be. Whether you are faced with demanding clients, even more demanding colleagues, or just the incessant activity of the environment itself, the workplace can at times feel like it is exerting a pressure down upon your shoulders that is difficult to extricate yourself from.

Not only is this unhealthy and detrimental to your wellbeing, it is also highly counterproductive for your organization. A stressed or unhappy employee is, for the most part, an unproductive employee who you do not necessarily want interacting with valuable clients, while its difficult to forge fruitful relationships with co-workers.

However, with these easy-to-use techniques, you can help turn your business space into an oasis of calm, boosting your work productivity at the same time.

At-desk meditations

It may be that you want to invoke some form of meditative state, but the last thing you want to do is draw attention to yourself from wide-eyed colleagues. If this sounds like you, then there are a number of at-desk meditations you can perform which will not only assist in destressing and boosting performance, but will do so without attracting unwelcome glances.

Here are a few of the most easy to use:

1. Tap your fingers to the rhythm of time

Put both of your hands on your thighs or on your desk, and proceed to start tapping each finger individually, starting with your pinky finger. It is important that you use a sequence, and time it effectively to a slow rhythm. The last part is to then recite a five-word mantra that relates to time.

There is an infinity of options here, but you could go with ‘I do have enough time’ or ‘Time is my best friend’. The idea is to create a zen-like state where you are breathing regularly and focussing on the small activity at hand (literally). Continue until your breathing has become regular and the repeated-mantra has eased though you to your core.

This is an immensely achievable meditative process that I love to utilize in any number of situations because it is so private.

“Nothing can bring you peace but yourself.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson

2. Shake it off

Now is the time to focus on exactly what or who is causing your stress. Take some time out, sit quietly on your chair, and take a few deep breaths while you think about the origin of your stress. Next, start to recite to yourself a mantra along the lines of ‘It’s OK and I can move on from this.’ Then, start to take a few deeper breaths and use the time you breathe out to really sigh away your frustration.

Finally, shake your body to release the tension from you. There is no need to make any deep noises or draw unwanted attention to yourself, but that really shouldn’t be a consideration anyway, and will only exacerbate your stress in the process. This is about breathing and release.

3. Eyes to the flame

If you are feeling a little braver, and you understand that an open flame will not cause any undue disquiet in the workplace around you (or that you are breaking any health and safety regulations), using a candle can be a wonderful tool to help create a meditative state. Start by switching off your computer. In fact, this is a good place to begin with any meditative activity as the glare from the screen will distract your attention.

Light the candle and then bring the flame towards your eye level, holding it approximately 20 inches away, or into a position that is comfortable. Then, stare into the flame for up to 2 minutes, remembering to breathe regularly as you do so.

“Calm mind brings inner strength and self-confidence, so that’s very important for good health.” – Dalai Lama

Meditations for a private space

If you have access to a private space in the workplace, there are other types of meditative positions which you can undertake, including, lying on the floor. Lying down immediately helps to put you in an unfamiliar position for work, which is helpful in itself, but a familiar position for feeling comforted and relaxed.

Close your eyes and then once again, start to breathe in a rhythmic manner. It is essential that your breathing becomes your primary focus, so you breathe in and out with a deep concentration on what you are doing.

When starting out, five minutes is more than apt, as long as that’s five minutes of a concentrated nature. You can then start to push out those times, and there is no reason why before long you shouldn’t be able to manage 20 minutes of perfect meditative calm. This can easily be done during a lunch break or even a mid-morning break.

There are also walking meditations for more adventurous types, which involves focusing on your steps and breaths simultaneously, concentrating always on a forward motion, both literally and figuratively. Emotional calmness and wellbeing in the workplace is just around the corner.

Have you tried meditation? If so, do you like it? Let us know your thoughts about meditation below!

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