Rejection is an ugly word and none of us – if we’re being truthful – likes to hear it. It’s here where the whole issue starts in the first place. If anyone reading this blog post thinks they can be wildly successful without a disproportionate amount of rejection served as an entrée on the side of life, then you’re sadly mistaken my friends
There are not too many guarantees in your life, but one of them is that you are going to get thrown around like a rag doll and rejected more times than you could ever hope to imagine. If you’re an entrepreneur, then triple that number and times it by three.
Where does this false dream of success without rejection come from? I blame television and Hollywood movies. We’re shown all these perfect success stories with most of the rejection cut out. Yes, we’re told to work hard and take action, but we’re rarely told to deal with rejection.
The best actors from Sylvester Stallone to Leonardo DiCaprio, have all dealt with their fair share of rejection. The reason why they’re so successful is because they didn’t give up when many of their fellow acting colleagues did.
It’s not easy to be told you have a stupid sounding voice like Sylvester Stallone or to be told you’re too short for the part. In actual fact, your flaws are what give you your distinct hidden advantage, and you probably haven’t even realised that yet buddy.
It’s time to wake up to reality and learn more about rejection. Here are 5 tips to help you to deal with rejection:
1. The less you care, the more successful you’ll be
It’s easy to take being told no personally. Rather than think this way, you need to view rejection as part of the journey. As you climb the mountain of your individual success journey, there will be stops along the way called rejection.
Rejection only takes hold of you when you pay attention to it or view a no as being “rejected.” In reality, when someone tells you no, what they’re saying is that they have an alternative plan for their life, and they view the offer differently to you.
I mean seriously, would you rather they lied to you? Stop feeling sorry for yourself and understand that the universe doesn’t exist for you and your set of rules about how life should be. Throw the rulebook out the window and take some risks.
You’re never going to get a date with that hot guy or girl you see at work every day unless you muster up the courage to ask them out. Don’t be a pussy and have a go! What’s the worse that can happen?
2. Have some confidence in yourself
Part of the reason we get rejected is because we don’t have the confidence to deliver our unique “ask.” No one is going to say yes to a request you ask of them if you don’t believe in what you’re saying. When you stand tall and deliver your request with passion and determination, people want to find a way to make your dream come true.
Even if they say no, they may just point you in the right direction if they can see your confidence (not ego) shine through in the most beautiful way. You’ve got nothing to lose so go out there and start hustling your way towards your dream.
No pursuit is easy at the start, but when you back yourself and have faith in the outcome, it’s amazing how the universe aligns to support you in every way. You’re actually damn confident when you want to be. Put on your best outfit and go ask the hard questions.
By asking the hard questions, you will learn more about yourself than you could ever expect. Pay attention to the rejection and find the area of your life that needs work.
“It’s impossible to keep being rejected if you work on yourself and try to be a better version of you each day” – Tim Denning
3. Life is a game of sales
The best salespeople embrace rejection, and they’re not afraid to be told no. I’ve been told no so many times that it almost doesn’t faze me anymore. I somehow know that the more no’s I get, ultimately, the more yes’s I get overall.
Your life is just one giant sales negotiation made up of hundreds of requests. For you to be a multi-millionaire, you don’t need everyone to say yes. In fact, out of a hundred proposals, all it takes is one to change your life.
See through all the detail and get to know just how rigged your life is in your favor. I feel like, with the right advice, there really is nothing we can’t achieve. It’s because of this belief that we spend weeks building up the courage to ask an important question and then almost expect rejection.
Sweating over a big decision won’t do you any favors. I’ve found that the more you understand what you want, and the less time you spend thinking about it, the easier it is to take bold action and get on with it. None of us are fortune-tellers, and we’re never going to know how things will pan out.
To play the game of life and win, what you need to do is figure out how you can experience rejection without letting it cripple your confidence. Could you learn to ask for things and then teach yourself not to care what the answer is? Of course you can.
4. When one door closes another door opens
Our existence can be thought of as a series of doors. As we progress through life, we peep behind different doors. Some doors lead to nothing and slam in our face. Other doors have a spectacular blue sky and rainbow behind them and feel so right.
There is an unlimited amount of doors for you to open during your life. While you don’t choose whether they close, you can choose to keep opening more doors. Sometimes the best doors you open are the one’s that appear straight after the doors that slam shut.
It’s not a competition to see how many doors you can open and not have close on you; it should be your goal though to focus your attention on the doors that have a positive effect on you. Your feelings towards rejection have a lot to do with how much you suffer from it. Emotion is what we all live for, and it does exist beyond the rejection.
“There is no point choosing to suffer from rejection when you could focus your limited effort on opening more doors. Eventually, you’ll open the door to your dream and maybe even to your heart at the same time.” – Tim Denning
Next week I’m going to practice what I preach and take a real risk in asking for something that I so badly want. Beyond my own perceived selfishness, I genuinely feel that the person I’m going to approach can benefit from everything I can bring to the table.
I have no idea what the future looks like; all I know is that I’ve spent every day I have trying to inspire others, and I feel like this person can help me do more of this work. I’m determined to surround myself with people who believe in the impossible like I do.
While I may be still in the blizzard storm of life, I see hope, strength, and unlimited possibility in my circumstances. I feel like I can do anything I put my mind to, and I honestly don’t care what the answers are to my requests.
I’ve got good over the years at re-focusing my attention quickly when rejection strikes. I have begun to accept that I will need to increase my rejection rate if I want to do things that no one else can do. We’re so damn powerful when we want to be and half the time we don’t even realise it.